a marriage doomed to fail from the start. Do you agree?

Hi Manong.. In my own opinion, age gaps is not a major factor for a relationship or marriage to survive all its challenges. As long as they are committed to each others pledge to live through thick and thin, then there's no problem to it. Most people think that relationships can survive if both partners are in the same age level or generation. Age is not the main concern here but the maturity of the young girl to accept the responsibility of a wife to a 57-yr old man. The man has more maturity and experience to handle such relationship because of his age. I think he has already seen the ups and downs of life. By the way, my uncle (70 years old) is happily married to her wife (25 years old) for 6 years already with 3 lovely daughters. Their family lives in a simple life..

Love has no limits to many individuals, and if they want it to work, it will work. I agree couples should have some common interests, and most people can find something to build on. When families come along, there is a big common interest right there, and that makes it worth all the extra effort you might have to put in to keep a marriage or relationship alive. Many couples have survived worse feats and a simple matter of age will not keep them from having a successful marriage. Also, as a friend, we should praise our friends' choices and wish them all the success, because the last thing they need is someone reining on their parade, friends can help keep the marriage and relationship strong just by being a good friend and supporting their friends' decision.

yes as you are saying that later or sooner they will realise the mistakes of their love as they will start facing harsh conditions of their life. but in my accordance see if they love each other very much than they will face life challenges easily and will stay together but still as me have seen till know age difference,than creates a lot of problem and if it is too much than it cannot succeed because than their views will not match. younger one will not be satisfied with its married life and slowly she will start feeling bored and unhappy from this life as it looks good and interesting in the starting but as you go on this way for a long time than you will realize that this is not correct way for me to go so in my accordance you should love people of your age than only you can succeed because then only your views will match.

I think the best you can do for them is shrug and let them make their own decisions. Yes, you're probably right..There are MANY generational differences between a 19 year old and a 57 year old; it's more than just an age difference. It's a generation difference. Eventually, things will probably not work out. But they are two consenting adults, who can make their own decisions - and make their own mistakes. So I guess you'll just have to wait and see how it plays out. Like you said, I personally agree with you - it DOES cross a line. I'm 19, and I could never imagine dating a 57 year old - let alone getting married to one (that's older than my dad!, and almost three times my age!) I think this happens a lot, though. Two people - regardless of age, get caught up in puppy love or just plain lust - and don't always remember that marraige is a LIFE-LONG commitment, and these "flings" and love affairs don't usually last for that long. But what can you do? The best you can do is be happy for them, and let them make their own mistakes and learn from them. (And who knows? They could find happiness and have a successful and happy marraige..Only time will tell!)

Hello friend, This is what they calls MAY-DECEMBER AFFAIR i guess. Well,we have no right to judge them,maybe they are destined for each other,and fate did played a great part of it. Yah,she maybe too young to be his wife,she can be his daughter(ugh!)But,love has truck them. Just hope she did the right decission and so with him,hope he is ready to face all the consequences for marrying a girl 3x of his age(almost) My parents age gap was 17 years,and i don't see any problem with their age gap until now,only the looks maybe,becoz my dad really looks like a granfather to us(his children whew lolz)and my mom looks as if our older sister only (hehehe) Let's just hope for the best...for your friend and his bride to be.

Yes manong05 age doesnt matter in marriage.But it depends upon the reason behind the marriage if the reason is love towards one another will then there is a possibility of a lasting marriage because both couples understands one another and acceppts one another no matter how young or how old their partners will be.There are a lot of things to consider in marriage.But if the reason behind the marriage is money will i dont a marriage will succeed because what if the other individual cannot support the need of his or her partner in terms of financial so there is a tendency of misunderstnading plus without patience can lead to separation.

38 years apart I agree it is a lot of gap, 4 generations at least. I wouldn't say anything against it though. I would however speak heart to heart with my friend, see if I can bring logic into the plan. Not to ruin it, but to make him more prepared of what he puts himself into. Being a lot older he must have more experiences in life that would help the young girl in her journey, but he never experiences marrying a young girl before so that will be something he has to be prepared for. I would also try to talk to the girl, only to see if her heart is in the right place and she is ready committing herself. I don't see why this marriage can't last. If both are prepared, it will. I'd imagine first years would be turbulent. My husband is 10 yrs apart from me and our first years were really hard on both of us. But we love each other so whatever people say it matters not.

How is she going to feel about this marriage when she is 39 and he is 77. I think some things just shouldn't be. I think it is very unfair of him to encourage this young girl. She deserves someone who can be a true partner to her and not someone she has to be a constant caretaker for. It may seem exciting now, but I don't think this is going to make either of them happy in the long run.

You are right there friend. Hey you know what, you should atleast tell your friend how things will be in the future. Being a 19 year old girl, I don't think its her fault that she has fallen in love cause 19 is the age these things happen. But the guy should understand the realities. One more good thing is that the guy wants to marry the girl and not just be in a physical relationship. But however nice this relationship may sound right now, its gonna be difficult in the future.... I wish all the best to the couple whether they marry or not...

One thing I have discovered is that true love has nothing to do with age. Time will catch up on this marriage. There will be lots of learning as well. I wish them every Joy and Happiness!

It would be difficult to say if this marriage would succeed or not without knowing this couple. I have a friend who married a guy over 20 years her age . . . and they are still happily together. Another friend just turned 25 and her husband is fifty something too - apparently they are doing well. In both cases, I don't see (and no one else sees) the connection as they are completely different from their spouses . . . but for them, it works out. If they are happy, what can anyone say? It wouldn't be fair to say they are doomed to fail unless you see something besides the age factor - like if he was abusive or she was a gold digger. Give them the benefit of the doubt . . . the marriage is their choice. It is quite possible that the young girl has never had anyone "love" her like this - and he is her first man in her life . . . and he's totally swept her off her innocent feet. But, sometimes it can work - if not, they're certainly find out later - and it will be their choice what they do from then on.

There is always a chance. Who knows they might have more in common than you realize. I am a firm believer that love grows in unusual places. If they were my friends I would just try to be supportive of them both and let nature have it's way.

Age doesn't make a difference, to a certain degree. But also consider that they each want different things at that age, and that may cause them to want to go down separate paths. When, I was 18, I was with a 34 year old. It didn't last long. However, I am 21 now and with a 29 year old, and he's the best thing that's ever happened to me. I guess you could consider also that it depends on how well you connect and relate.

In everyones life you reach that point where a person will love another person refardless of what the circumstances are. Life is life and sometimes you have to let people make their own mistakes. It's proven that most relationships fail till you reach a certain age, and it greatly increases when there is no common interests or activities to share. However, people grow and love and learn how to live when they make these "mistakes" (and by mistakes i mean them dating people that you just know will not last). So i agree that this relationship is in time doomed to failure, but there is so many things that one can learn in life by loving another person. Both of them will grow in this mistake, and though they might end on a bad note, no matter how bad a relationship is you always take some good from it, and you are always changed even if you were in love for only a few short months... I'm not sure if this helped at all, and this is my first reply to a discussion, so i hope i didn't do something wrong, but i hope this advice does help you to know that although all relationships like that won't last, it's nothing you need to fear or be uneasy about.

Hello manong, First of all, I would say, don't interfere in their 'love' story. But realistically, what I see is, they have not had a big circle of friends hense what they see, they grab. It might be love to them, it might be lust. Only they know. Will this marriage succeed? Some marriage made in heaven failed miserably. Everyone should be given a fair chance in marriage and let's just hope for the best.

You might be surprised though. Give them a chance, be a good friend to them. You never, ever know, they may have more interests in common than you think.