Secret bank account!

Hi prikayjo2436. I was wondering why bf-gf should have a joint-account when in fact they are still not married. I believe that it is ok for you to have your own "secret account". You have all the right to keep your own money , save it and spend it on the things you want. You should not feel guilty at all because you are not yet married.

its ok if you hide your mony with your boyfriend. he is not your husband yet and I think it i your right because as a woman you have to secure your future together with your daughter.

I think everyone should have a safety net so to speak. What happens if he leaves yu and since he is the only bread winner by some standards,then what are you to do? I haven't done it myself with my husband because well I never have any of my own money,well I take that back I do have my paypal. I don't see anything wrong with it really.

hello prikayjo2436, i guess not. you don't need to tell him about that and don't feel bad either for not telling him. as they say, his money is your money and your money is yours too. you'll be needing that when time arises. it's for your own protection and your kids too.

I think that is not bad. That is your bank account and your private money. For me, my wife money is only for her. My money is for my family. I have big responsibility for my family

I don't think its bad because you don't have a bad intention for creating a secret bank account. I believe that you do it for reassuring the future of your daughter which your boyfriend might understand if he will know the truth.

To be completely honest no I don't think you are wrong! I am also a stay at home mom of two kids and my boyfriend is the only one that works. And I have a stash of money that he doesn't know about. I feel guilty sometimes about it, but at the same time I like having money for myself, like when we run out of "bill money" I like that I can get some cash from my little stash and go out to eat or something. It sounds silly, but whatever lol

humm not really. nothing wrong for a woman to stach some money away because never know what will happen with you and him. but if you get married then i would tell him.

You don't have to feel guilty about that. You should do that being a clever women. I have my own personal account and my husband doesn't know my account balance. He never cares about it too. I work and keep the money with me eventhough we spent together for common things related to both of us without taking into account how much each person spent.

When I was with my ex, I had one account he knew about and 2 others he didn't know about. I also have a house up until today he doesn't know about. It best you shut it, don't tell him anything about it and don't feel guilty as everyone now needs a plan B. Think of that one as a plan B. At the rate of divorces and people breaking up and leaving one person with nothing, you should be thankful that at least you have some sort of safety net. I have seen too many singles mothers who get dumped by their boyfriends and leave them with nothing. So if I were you, I would continue to keep it a secret, I wouldn't feel bad or guilty. It certainly is a brilliant idea from my perspective.

I think, thats not bad. You has done right activies. Remember, any time you need a cost of living and it is not possible not met if you did not prepare earlier

Income from babysitting? If you won't mind, can you tell me how much you're earning from this job? So now you're also earning money online?

No I dont think it is. Especially since you and your boyfriend aren't married. Incase you need to get out of where you are now, you need to make sure that you have money put aside of your own. Don't feel bad. Even when I get married I will probably have my own bank account seperate from the joined accounts. I probably wont keep it secret but I will have one. That way should divorce arise or anything, I'll have my own money to fall back on.

no this is not wrong, you going in correct way. even i have my own account. don't feel guilty, be brave... thankyou.

You are your own person and you are entitled to having your own money. However, why are you hiding the money from him, that's what I'm curious about. Is it because you're saving it to leave him because he's abusive? Or because he's not a great spender and you don't want him having access to your money? Or do you just have some sort of ulterior motive for saving all of that money? If it's not really a big deal for saving the money, then it probably shouldn't be a secret unless you've got some specific reason for keeping it hidden.

I guess my question is why do you feel that you need to have a secret bank account to hide money? In some situations some do feel the need but I would think that is if they are secure in their relationship or something is off. Not saying this is how you feel or anything. I guess Im just trying to understand the need unless there is something wrong.

There is nothing wrong with having your own money. I do wonder though about the secrecy. Is he controlling? Would he have a problem with you putting a little money aside? You definitely want a safely net if he is.

There are times when I will get money for doing something on the internet, and not tell my husband about it. Mostly it's just because I know how we are. If there's extra money somewhere we'll assume we can spend it, and sometimes I just want to save it or do something particular with it. So I guess it depends on why you're hiding it from him. I don't think I'd hide large sums of money from my husband. Or at the very least I'd tell him about the account, and let him know you'd like to save some of your own money, then you don't have to tell him how much. At the same time, I do believe that you do have a responsiblity to help with the household finances, if you're capable and if it's needed. In my situation, we could certainly use a lot more money than my hubby's making, so it would be very wrong of me to hide money from him and just save it up. Why should we ONLY use his money if I can make some of my own... KWIM?

I think that depends on how guilty you feel. Otherwise I wouldnt worry about it. Although you have been together awhile, it helps to have a little bit of a safety net. you can tell him that you have it if you want, because there is nothing that he can really do about it, besides gripe and complain, and if he cant understand you saving for a personal rainy day then that should confirm your right to have one.

in my point of view, you have to tell your partner about your secret bank account especially that you are feeling guilty. he might get angry but if you'll let him understand why you did that then surely, if he truly loves you, he will forgive you. but if he'll learn about this from other people, there is a great possibility that your relationship would shatter. would you like that to happen? i believe you do not.