do u go with a mother who left her chid for other guy
By deepamoorthy
@deepamoorthy (239)
India
November 16, 2009 6:47am CST
surely i can't go with such a thing.we read a lots of incidents in newspaper and hear
about such things in our daily life.i incident which i heard from my sis .it was one of college girls .she loved a guy and married him and she had a child also and suddenly one day she went with her parents and married someone and has a kids also.
she left her 1st child with her 1st husband and till today had never came to see the girl.won't that child miss her mother she should have considered her child before taking any decision.according to me a man can leave and go but a mother should not do such a thing.motherhood is a gift given by god .what do u think about it friend.
1 person likes this
17 responses
@JayShay82 (78)
• United States
16 Nov 09
No good mother would chose a man over her own child. A child needs their mother. As painful as it probably will be for her child, she may be better off without such a person in her life. If her father is there for her, loves, and supports her through life; she may have questions later on, but atleast she will know she was with a parent who gave her all the love he had.
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
16 Nov 09
u r right. her father takes care of her like a mother .he didn't even marry another
another person.i feel sorry for the guy also think how hard it is to bring up a child.moreover a child should have both the parents love.
@JayShay82 (78)
• United States
16 Nov 09
I think all kids should have both parents in their lives as well. Imagine if the mother would have stuck around. She may have just made her child feel as if she were unwanted or just a bother to her and her new husband. As much as she may want and need her mother around when she starts to become a "woman", the damage to her may be far worse to be treated as an outsider by her own mother. Tell your friend good luck and even though it may be hard, it will be worth it and mean so much to his daughter in the end.
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
16 Nov 09
hey he is not my friend or i have seen this person .but i get to know about this guy from my sisters friend.i will pass this message to my sisters friend.
@Skyeblue25 (545)
•
16 Nov 09
My husband had this situation happen to him with my step daughter. His ex-girlfried, his daughters mother, walked out and left him with her, she was only a baby. She didn't get in contact for three years. Then when she did it was when she could be bothered to turn up.
One day she decided she wanted her daughter to live with her. My husband wasn't happy at all about this as she clearly hadn't put the child first at any point. Plus she wouldn't turn up to see her daughter when she was supposed to or anything else.
They ended up in court and she won custody, though my husband had the right to see his daughter each weekend.
Anyway, his ex didn't allow him to see his daughter at all. So after bringing her up for 3 years by himself, he then had no access at all.
You can imagine what he went through, you say a mothers love is very special, but I believe a fathers love is just as great. He fought for 6yrs in total, just to gain access to see his daughter. By the time he saw his daughter again she didn't know him very well and it took a long time to reestablish the bond between them.
His ex still makes contact extremely difficult, she even tried moving further away so he couldn't collect her. Luckily his daughter took to me really well and together we will keep on fighting to keep access.
Its really hard on the child when either a parent disappears or refuses to let the child see the other parent. It has a huge effect emotionally on the child. My stepdaughter now has her own mobile phone, she is 13. She phones all the time and we see her as often as is possible
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
16 Nov 09
it is a bad thing happened to your husband his ex did't have any responsibility on her child what right she has to claim her child .court should have considered
these points .i can understand the pain he might have gone through .it is a sad part
the child did't remember ur husband .we can't blaim the child.how is their bond now.how do u feel about the child .can u accept her .don't feel bad that i am asking u this.
@Skyeblue25 (545)
•
16 Nov 09
I met her when she was four. She is wonderful. She accepted me from day one, I actually think I made it easier as she had my son to distract her while bonding with her Dad. She was our bridesmaid at our wedding, and she gives me a big hug everytime she sees me or leaves to go home. If she phones her dad she always wants to speak to me to.
I had no problems accepting her at all. My heart went out to her, as there was a time when she was four and my hubby went to pick her up at 11am in the morning. She had got herself up and was making a cup of tea in the kitchen. She burnt herself. Her mother was asleep in her bedroom, the front door was wide open.
Right or wrong my husband picked her up and took her to ours. We didn't hear from her mother for two days. Now I will never understand her Mum, I think she is selfish and spiteful for various reasons. But I would never blame the child. We never put her Mum down in front of her either. I believe the child will make her own mind up in time.
Also as much as I disagree with the courts decision, a child does need a mothers love, we are not all blessed with ideal mothers.
@Ithink (9980)
• United States
17 Nov 09
I dont care if it is a male (father) or female (mother), children should always ALWAYS come first. I myself dont understand some people nowdays, we have 7 biological children and have had our 1 granddaughter since birth.
The thing is not everyone is made to be a mommy or daddy. Anyone can sleep with someone and produce a child but it takes the someone special to be there for them to raise them. I would never have choosen a man over any of my kids EVER! That includes our granddaughter that is now 2 years old. I would fight for her just as I would for my biological child. I write biological because I have had it told to me but she isnt really yours. She might not have been born from me but we love her as thou she is and for all purposes she is ours. To just up and leave a child.. I dont understand how anyone can do that.
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
17 Nov 09
yeh u r right if the girl had made the mistake her mother could have thought for her granddaughter.any how (the child's) fathers family is taking care of their grand daughter.
@msedge (4011)
• United States
17 Nov 09
Sounds familiar to me.I had known one that really did the same.A mother who left her 2 very young kids and husband in replace with another man.Then they got married and had 3 children which she also left behind for another man.I dont understand what kind of heart she has.I did everything for my child.I tried so hard to give her a better life.But she never has a heart to think of her children.I think she is so selfih to just think of her own happiness.I cant imagine myself leaving my child for a guy.Children are gift from God.We must take good care of them and show our love.Thats all they need...
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
17 Nov 09
i don't know how a man accepts such kind of a person.if they avoid such a women then maybe we can avoid such situation.as u told kids r gods gift .i remember lots of parents wanting for a child.
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
17 Nov 09
Obviously the mother didn't love the child or care about what happened to it. I imagine she was pretty young being married out of college probably to the wrong guy. She probably felt trapped to this man due to the child and this was her way of cutting the strings. I am not in away saying what she did was correct. Just saying that maybe that was her thinking when she did what she did.
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
17 Nov 09
maybe u r right but whatever her situation was .a good mother will take her kid with
her.normally mother hesitate to leave their child in a daycare also .i know lots mothers crying before leaving in a daycare. they leave their kids in a daycare because they have no other go.while sitting in the office their thoughts will be filled with their child, worrying what the child will be doing. this is the nature of mothers.it goes with from human to animal.so a mother doing such bad things never goes in animal category also.
@bentoyhk (202)
• Hong Kong
17 Nov 09
Nowadays things happen like this a lot. People get married in their early age. They can't even take care themselves. It happens with a trend. Therefore elderly should educate our teens more about their responsibility to themselves and their kids.
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
17 Nov 09
yeh u said in case of early marriage .here the girl got married after completing her gradation even though we consider her as young age .she loved this guy got married and even changed her religion and had a child .they were happy ,no one knows the reason for her behavior. i guess that her parents have a great role in her behavior.they changed her mind and made her leave her family.here the elders have made the mistake.i am sure the girl might have felt for her behavior and may be she is not able to fight her parents or leave the situation she is in now(hope so she realized) .
@ladygator (3465)
• United States
16 Nov 09
That is a very immoral thing to do. I think that there are really no good reasons to leave your own child, especially for a man. I think that is the worst thing you could do. But apparently if the mother could leave for another man she is not much of a mother. The worst part however is the emotional wreck the child has got to be in since a child loves their mother no matter what. Even when they aren't the greatest parent. I have seen this and in this case all of her sons are incarcerated. Way to go mom!!
@saifulbabe (74)
• Indonesia
16 Nov 09
The problem is why do we repeat the same thing occasionally. My dad left me and my mum. Just back to our self and don't do what the dad or mum had done, will you ? We need to concern about it and get a quality in life
@animegirl334 (3263)
• United States
17 Nov 09
That really is a horrible thing. Neither a mother nor a father would abandon a child. When two people decide to have a child together, they should to ready to commit to the responsibility.
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
17 Nov 09
You right mother should not leave her children without any other reason. Or even do there is case beyond that family she should stay for the sake of her children...That is an immoral things for me. Because As far as I know mother will do anything for the sake of her children but to leave them without any reason is really bad...
@xannebull (1793)
• Philippines
17 Nov 09
She's not a good mother, she's selfish since she only considers her own happiness without thinking of the welfare of her child. A mother must not leaver her children no matter what.
@mrssator2002 (281)
• Philippines
18 Nov 09
No matter what her reason she is still wrong in leaving her child. In every angle she did a big mistake. I really do can't understand why there is a mother who can afford to left her child. For me no matter what life could bring I should have my child beside me.
@hokaido (30)
• Malaysia
17 Nov 09
Felt sad after reading the case, i hate that, she only care of herself happiness, selfish and not responsible. She should step on her child shoe to think that if she was being treated like this, how will her feel ? a cruel heart mother.
@sarwanever (435)
• India
16 Nov 09
its really hard to listen on this i feel bad really bad about the mother excuse me not mother just lady. mother is one who leave anything for her child fights for her child so i can never call that lady as mother of kid i can use some bad word to call her ...totally not good leaving kid and lover for some other guy i don't like girls leaving their lover but this is too much if the person is know to me i will kill her how did her parents allowed to do these non sense ...these people can die instead of living ..sorry about hard words used in this post bit angry after reading the post
@deepamoorthy (239)
• India
16 Nov 09
her parents didn't her 1st marriage .so they supported her.who ever supports her as a mother she should only think of her child .we all feel for the small child but she or her family don't have a heart .it is best they didn't take the child with them .they could do any thing to the child.but now she has a good father and the guys family takes care the child very well.
@Hazelrose (2179)
• Philippines
17 Nov 09
Hi deepamoorthy,A mother who left her child for another guy is irresponsible.She should take care of her child,It is really bad for a mother not doing he responsibilities, maybe she did'nt love her child.Good Luck!
@happy2512 (1266)
• Philippines
17 Nov 09
On my own idea that mother is irresponsible and is only after of his personal satisfaction. She is still immature she thinks everything she did is a game. I pity her child for having a mother whose mentality is like a men.
@kannanmohan1988 (36)
• India
17 Nov 09
Hi
She spoiled the era of motherhood i hope so the child is with the father...! Laws should be strict and it should be treated equally for both men and women
This kinda a sin will never leave her
Any way the child is in stake lets pray....!
Regards
Kannan
