How can some mothers treat her children soo differently?

What you say is so true though I really don’t know the real reason behind it. I am a single child and I have only one son but I have seen this partiality in so many families…even in my own family, immediate and extended. As far as the youngest child is concerned, I can still understand as we women are more partial to babies and its our last motherhood so naturally the youngest child is pampered more, but as for other children…you know the middle one out of five or maybe the one before last…I really don’t know why they too get the special treatment. Another thing that gets my goat is the treatment meted out to the eldest child…s/he is always expected to grow up fast, take care of his/her siblings, behave in a matured way and shoulder the responsibilities of the family if anything happens to the parents! As if they don’t have a right to have a normal childhood, to be pampered, to act silly or show sibling rivalry!!!

mothers are probably figuring thats where their child went wrong with other siblings and are determined that not to repeat this same misstake again with you. they are teaching you responsibilty and how to survive on your own. i think its difficult to treat all your children same because your children are different and they have different habbits and nature.

hi, well... I have 2 and they are still a little. I never treat them differently cuz I Love them both the same way. we should not treat our children differently cuz they will have a bad feeling if we do that, do you agree with me?

jugsjugs I have seen some moms with three or four children and they treat each a little differently because they are all unique, each child may have different wants and needs and she does not favor one over another she just makes each child feel special as it know its mom thinks she is one of a kind. so maybe that was a little of what you were seeing, I dont know but I do know no two kids in a family are quite a like so I would treat each one as an idividual if I had been lucky to have more than two. I lost one at age 8, and could have no more children. My son is now fifty. My little girl did get more special care as she was brain damaged but they were loved equally believe me.

I have 8 children, they are all grown and on their own now. I always love them the same. I never had a favorite, they are all special in their own ways. As for the money part....That was based on age and needs. Like when the youngest was 2 and the oldest was 16 they did not get the same. They got what they needed. I always tried to do things as a group, and i always tried to give each child some special time alone when ever i could. Not all children are the same so they all need different things. at different times. and each of them need different special attention at different times.

I have just two children, but I do see that I treat them differently. I think a big part of the reason that I treat them differently is that one is a girl and the other is a boy. I will rough house with my son but not as much with my daughter. With my daughter I will sit down and play quiet games fairly often but I don't do that nearly as often with my son. Why do I think that there is a difference in the way that I treat them? I think it is because there is a significant difference in their personalities. I know that I love them both the same way.

I really dont know as I set here and watch GrandmaKK treat grandkids differently

Maybe because some kids are easier than others. Then again it could be preference. My late MIL thought her son hung the moon(boy was she wrong) and tried to treat my son special until I put my foot down. I treated mine all the same, even my stepdaughter who still thinks of me as her second mom.

perhaps she was prejudiced towards them from the start. perhaps they are just more active, or less well behaved. perhaps it's not her, it's them? even in teaching, some children are easier to love than others. but the important thing as parents is not to let it show. to always treat all fairly, not to let them have any excuse to cry favoritism.

We may love all our children the same but treat them differently because they are different. It is not always appropriate to treat children exactly the same. I have known parents who were so hung up on treating each child the same that what they bought for one child they bought exactly the same item for the other child. If one child was enrolled in a dance class, both children were enrolled in a dance class, even though one of them would rather be playing baseball. The child's attitude toward the parent will also affect how the parent reacts to the child. One would be inclined to be more lenient to a cheerful loving child than one who is surly (maybe because he didn't want to go to dance class).

Well I have 4 children all grown up[ thank goodness] and I loved them equal but I did treat them differently according to their own personality, they are their own person so no one is the same what is good for one is not good for the other I always spend one on one time with each other and I still do it today! and I Am happy to say today they are very succeful people each to their own chosen profession which are quite related somehow. So back to your question love them all the same but remember they all are different human beans.

i try to treat my 3 the same,disipline wise i'm slightly different with the youngest because of his behaviour problems,i have to disipline him in a different way than the others,like the older ones i just tell off,but the younger doesn't understand that so i have to sit and explain everything before getting to the punishment,,i think that's the only way i treat them different

Hello, Jugsjugs, in our area, lots of parent treat boy much better than girl. They even give their baby daughter to others in order to give birth to a son later... And all of their property will be heritated by their son... I do not understand why as well...

Hello, jugsjugs! Do you mean favoritism? I can relate to parents who treat their children differently depending on their ages and needs. Treating them differently in just a matter of a day to correct their mistakes, for example as a punishment for them is understandable. But treating the child totally different for the rest of his/her life is not good. Parents should treat their children equally. I don't really understand parents showing favoritism towards their children. I feel so sad for those people who experienced being left behind by their own parents. I only have a child, but if I have more, I will never do that to them. I will love them fairly as possible. Thank you for this post. Have a wonderful day!

yeah i dont understand that myself. but my mom did treat me different from my one brother, she would spoil me but it was because my one brother was so bad growing up. me and my sister was the only two there always for my mom

I don't know the answer to that question although I have witnessed it first hand. My aunt and uncle had 3 children the first 2 were girls the 3rd was a boy. The mother always favored the boy (the baby and the only son) And she would always single out the oldest and I heard her say on many occasion that she was her father favorite. Well, where did that leave the middle child? I always felt bad for my middle cousin as she was always pushed aside. But I was closest in age to the oldest so whenever I had sleepovers my mother would invite her. In retrospect we should have invited both girls. But my cousin (the middle one) is now an adult and she has always had a harder life. She didn't do well in school- no wonder with her self esteem being shot down publicly all the time by her own mother.. She was always angry, at someone or something or life in general. very confrontational.. I never blamed her and in fact as we got older I made it a point to talk to her more and be kind. She didn't deserve the upbringing she got. All because a Mother chose favorites.. She screwed up her daughters life!

it may be that the mother whom you are referring is having step children. It is very rare that a mother can ever discriminate among her children. Mothers are the best in the world when it comes to loving their children. Give are ready to give their life for them. they do every possible thing to make their child comfortable.

because favoritism exist and those children are likely to receive a lot of privilege than those other child whom the mother have less interest. those child who feel unloved are likely to rebel and become disobedient while those child who receive most care are likely to care for their parents when they become old.

Mothers should treat their children equally. It is wrong to give all of your love to just one child or two. There are enough hardships and disappointments to face in life without carrying the burden of your parents attentions with you. Show all of your children the same kind of love and the criticisms too. What you do for yur children now determines their future.

as far as I am concerned, I think the treat just can be distinguish between the diffierent mothers.But I think the mother just want to make a child who can be good enough. If they all are good enough. I think they will be treated well equal. Happy mylot.