Overly phony and nice people.

Hope you do not classify all polite and nice people in that category. :) I am presuming I am one of them. I am polite, not sure whether I am nice. :)

Yes, yes! I know what you mean. There are people who are like that, who seem to be very nice and sweet and yet at the back of their minds there lies poison. They say nice things and have the tendency to show goodness to everyone you may not be able to see the phoniness of the person. That's what happened to this person who posted photos of a very ill colleague under the pretense of being nice and helpful when actually the effect was cruel and malicious.

Hi megamatt, I think we have all dealt with people like that at one time or another. Still there are people that are really really nice. My aunt came across as being overly nice and some thought her phony. She was really sweet and nice. That would could find something kind to say about a rapist. I know this because I'd heard her in action. Now many people including myself could be accused of being how you describe i think. I talk nice to just about everyone including people I don't particularly care for. Unless someone is confrontational to me then I don't see a need in being anything but pleasant and polite to people. I don't feel that I'm being phony but just treating them with kindness and respect. I don't lead them to believe we are best buds. I mean we don't hang out and they don't come to my home.

I am real. I don't fake being polite on mylot, or in real life. I hate people who act like something that they aren't. My policy is to be myself, no matter what and I don't apologize for that. Some people like that I am brutally honest, others don't. I would rather have people who know the real me, than fake being something I really am not.

My mom dated an guy like that. He was always really nice but he had such a shady side to him. I picked up on it pretty fast, it took a while for my mom. He lied about alot of stuff, and acted like he was all that and a bag of chips. He definitly wasn't!

I have dealt with people like that all the time. I'm simply very, very irrated with those types of people. I try not to talk to them. Quite frankly I seriously don't see the point. I know when they are trying to be fake, and it just keeps me from slapping them all over the place.

I regularly have to deal with a woman just like you described but the problem is that we live in a small town so her false face is very well known. She will be so nice to your face and then talk about you behind your back. Of course, her comments always get back to the person she talks about but she never learns...she was running her mouth about someone just last night at a meeting I attended.

I've worked with people like this. They were super nice to your face while working behind the scenes to get you fired. It is particularly unsettling when you know this person for their dastardly deeds, but no one else can see it. One learns to just bide your time. The true person always surfaces for the world to see.

I know a lot of people like this, but I don't associate myself with them anymore. I hear people talk bad about other people because they don't like them but when they see them they are talking really nice and acting like they are best friends. Why do they do this? I don't know but it sure is phony. I used to have a lot of friends that would always talk about me for some reason. Then when I would get around them they'd act like I was their best friend. A bunch of phony lames. If I ever became like that I couldn't deal with it. But I don't have to worry about that because I'm never going to be like that.

I have dealt with this kind of people too. They appear nice alright, but there's just something fake about them compared to those who are actually undeniably nice. I talk to them as I would normally talk to a friend but carefully with what I say, and I do not take them seriously. Once I've heard that they are stabbing me at the back or proven that I was right of their hidden intentions all along, I usually confront them with brutal honesty.

There is a reason behind their niceness. They don't know how to be rude. It is the problem. They are not really phony. It is just that their parents told them to be tolerant of irritating people and so it has got into their habit. But after a few minutes they feel bad and thus they end up talking about this to their friends.

No I have never met anyone who has been phony about being kind.I can always tell when a person is phony though.Still their is a lot of kind people in our world today.

The X Files said it best... "trust no one" Yeah, I've dealt with this alot too. Sometimes not just overly nice, but just fakeness in general, and that gut feeling that someone just can't be trusted. I say it's better safe than sorry, and to heed your warning signs, but try not to ever get caught up in a liars game, as they can be very clever and others might not be as perceptive or as responsive as you. "Never argue with fools, 'cause people, from a distance, can't tell who is who."

yeah ..dozens of times. i just do mind. i can be sometimes like that. lol.

hi megamatt yes but if a person looks or sounds phony then she or he is not at all what I would call nice. Nice is not something you put on like an aura or cosmetics. Either a person is just born nice or not. I can spot phoniness a mile away as the person is not overly nice,they are instead overly polite. for one thing our American culture is more and more casual to the point to too much so at times. so when we do meet someone who is really polite we at times think no nobodys that nice, but really politeness that comes naturally to a good person is never phony. Most people can tell real goodness from phoniness. For one thing good people will look you in the eye as they have nothing to hide, a phony nasty nice person will not do this. We could all at times take a few lessons in good manners and being polite.

I guess what irritates me most about nicy nicy people is that I know that they are not being themselves. And I love being around people that are comfortable in my presence and can be themselves. Because if they are comfortable, then it makes it much more comfortable for me to associate with them. And when people are themselves, they appear to be much more trustworthy.

Hi megamatt, Yes, I've been through the same situation countless times, it's unbelievable. Sorry to say, but these people are hypocrites. Some of them are being nice because they have ulterior motives. Some of them love to gossip and they want to know what you think. Then they make it more interesting by editing your story when they relay it to others. They are troublemakers. Yet, you'd turn out to be the villain. How's that? I'd rather deal with those who are frank and honest coz with them I'd know where I stand. But don't you worry. When all is said and done, they will be accountable for their own actions.

Hello megamatt. I really like this topic too. I have met several of these types of people and they make me nervous as well. I find that those are the people that should be avoided unless you want to be back stabbed. I don't think it is normal to be either nice or happy all the time. People who are nice all the time are usually looking for private information about you that they can tell others behind your back. In the past, when I have started a new job, I have found that there were 1 or 2 of these kinds of people and they were always trying to cozy up and invade my space and it usually turned out that they were trying to get information about me to tell others. Of course, these were the ones who mostly "befriended" me from the beginning. Being nice is a good thing and so is being happy, but over doing it is revolting and suspicious as far as I am concerned. In the end overkill is overkill and it isn't natural to be too nice and sweet all the time.