An update on my brother

I don't have someone with alzheimers, but I had a grand mother that my brother insisted on keeping at home with him, no nursing home he said, she fell while he was at work, and when he took her to the doctor, doc said, you are doing her more harm than good by keeping her with you. This made my brother mad for a bit, then doctor said that a person old and sick needs to be somewhere where they can get constant medical attention. I know when my mother in law was sick with cancer, my sister in law would not let her go to a nursing home and even though we all went to help when she needed it, it was really hard on her. I know we love them and want to keep them with us, but are we doing the best thing for them. I think in time it will wear you down, I know it did us. But you can be sure that your brother has the love it takes to take care of him at home. Most kids just throw them in a nursing home go by once a week or a month and it done. Have you talked to the doctor about him staying with his daughter, I'm not saying put him in a nursing home just saying is he getting what he needs other than love where he is. I hope never to have to be put there and I don't know if I would want to be a burden on my children, but putting someone there can be awful hard on the love ones. Good luck and maybe ease up a bit, if you get worn out you won't be good to help at all. My prayers are with you all in this struggle.

Alzheimers is a very difficult desease. I worked with them for many years and found that if you have patience things can be just fine. On the good days get him talking. Get him to tell you all his stories. The biggest thing is to build trust. When he becaomes upset try and get him to talk about some thing else. The thing about the desease it's like becomeing a child all over again. They will best remember the years between 18 and 26 years of age. As much as I hate to say it at times you will have to be firm with him like you would be a child. Another thing is try not to make sudden movments take things nice and slow. Ask him to help you with small things. It is said that on some level they remeber everything they just can't communicate it like they once did. I wish you the best of luck with your situation. Also check out www.alz.org you may get some useful info. from there.

HI Pose I really admire you that you are giving a helping hand in times of need. i am sure that even if your brother is not in a position to appreciate what you are doing for him, his daughter does. Even if no one does I am sure that your good deeds won't go unnoticed with our Creator. I don't have a relative with Alzheirmers and during my brief nursing career I did not had the chance to deal with such patience so I am not the person to give you an advice. I hope that you ll persevere to keep taking care of your brother until it is humanely possible.

You don't have to have a support group where you are, you can have an online support group. I just did an Alzheimers support search on line and found several different sites you can go to. If nothing else you can find the most up to date information and treatments if any. This is what I would do, if nothing else I could find out what to expect in the future. I'll be more than happy to chat with you anytime you need a shoulder. Just PM me. Pat

There is a great deal of information on the Internet about Alzheimers and in most areas support groups to help caretakers. Please make use of a support group, there is nothing as healing as being with others that are going through the same health situations. Blessings to all of you.

Hi Pose, You are a good-hearted person, and you truly love your brother. You niece must be lucky to have you around in her struggle to keep her dad, you are a gem. I've seen one of my uncles suffer from Alzheimer's when I visited him in California. I don't know if you can call it mild (or is there such a thing?) because one moment he's like he's really there when I talk to him, then some other times he seem so distant and he talks so differently and out-of-context. But my aunt was there for him until the day he passed away, and she refused to have him confined in a home care, even when their children have already insisted. My aunt would always recall how good my uncle was as father and husband. I think I've seen very few couples who really stick it out with each other, and with so much fondness even as they age.

Hi Pose I am so sorry about this I used to visit an elderly Lady who had Alzheimer but I did not have to take care of her she was also very confused, I used to visit her with Gissi as she loved Gissi and it always made her happy to see him, her Daughter had her sectioned before Christmas which saddened me I do not have the Experience of looking after someone with this Illness, but I have heard it is not an easy task please do not tire yourself out doing this Pose I know he is your Brother, it is wonderful you are doing this but also take care of yourself

Wow, I really admire you for taking care of your brother because I know that is probably not easy ,but try to do this for as long as you can because you still have the opportunity to enjoy time with him.