Guys, please help me!!

Malaysia
March 3, 2010 8:56pm CST
Hi guys, I am in such confused for my younger sister. We are so closed. Nothing happened I mean I never talked to her in such rude way or those related things. But, in these days she is so mad to me. I could not think at all why she mad at me. There's only two things that I could discover. 1. I may did some mistakes without realizing it. 2. Some of our friends may tell her something bad So, I need you guys opinion. Should I let it be like that (I just let her in that way without trying asking her what happen since she is not the frank type. I am sure she will say nothing. Or wait her to ask me what happened as if any person did tell some bad things since I think if she trust me she will not trust the words from others easily. Or ask her what happened although I know for 95% percent she will say nothing.. I'm totally confused with this situation.
4 people like this
20 responses
@victorywp (3524)
• United States
4 Mar 10
you need to ask her what you have done wrong that makes her so mad at you. you should not wait any longer, otherwise things might gone worse. if it's hard to talk face to face, you can always try other ways like email her, call her through her cellphone, message her through her cellphone, write a letter/note to her, send her gifts with a card/note, etc.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
thanks vic,I reallly don't want the situation get worse. I love her so much. But I'm thinking to give her like couple days more to make her cooler and I'll try to avoid her in these days. Is that fine? Thanks again for your suggestion!
1 person likes this
@victorywp (3524)
• United States
4 Mar 10
while waiting for her to cool down, maybe you can treat her one of her favourite food & see what's her reaction.
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
I did try last two night. I didn't work at all.
@akuler (3531)
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
Hi money_maker, I think you should talk to her. But wait till she has a "good" mood and not when she has that sour face. But do not expecting some answer for her (as you expecting she will be). It is only to show her that you are care. If you do not get the answer as you expected, do not push to hard. Calm down and let her be like what she done right now. I am sure, one day she will ask you what ever goes in her mind. Good luck. Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
Hi akuler, thanks for your suggestion. I'm thinking to give her some few days to cool up herself. So I have a question, is it good for me to avoid her in these days in order to cool her down?
1 person likes this
@akuler (3531)
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
If you could do that, then it is better. But do it normally. Do not show any sign that you are trying to avoid her. I am afraid the worst if she knew it. Do like what you always do.
1 person likes this
@jammyt (2818)
• Philippines
5 Mar 10
Like what others here have told you, I suggest you talk to your sister even if you know she won't tell you. The reason for this, is that you cant go on not knowing what you did or why she is mad at you.For sure there is a reason and you will never know if you don't ask. You can also tell her that you're not a mind reader to know everything. In time, things will be okay. Another option is for you to write her if you cant really talk to her. Goodluck and I hope things will work out.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
5 Mar 10
Hi jammyt, I did exactly what did you tell me in this morning. As I expected she won't tell anything and she just kept saying nothing. But then I gave her sms since she didn't want to talk with me in that long time.
@ghieptc (2522)
• Philippines
5 Mar 10
In the first place you said you've done anything wrong with her but she got mad at you maybe there a reason why. Apparently, some people forgot things and can't remember until someone tell it again so maybe that's why you sister got mad at you. However, if you don't even know what you've done wrong, try to figure it out again and again. But then if you realize that you really haven't done anything wrong maybe you should wait for the perfect time to talk about the issue and if she's also in a good mood. She was still young as you said most young people looking for so much attention and caring. Maybe she is just jealous to something because you said are so closed to each other. Maybe you became busy to something and that time she need your attention. There's a lot of possible reason that I can see why she got mad at you or for without any reason why she have to got mad. I believe that everything will be back to normal and your closeness soon...
1 person likes this
@yresh12 (3212)
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
Maybe she's just having a bad day.. sometimes we could just not be in a good mood.The best part is your the only person that she could just get mad at. Just simply ask her what's the problem so that you would be able to know what the real problem is.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
Hi yresh, thanks for your opinion. Yup, maybe..Yresh..you are absolutely right. She talked and laugh normally with the others except me!!!
• Indonesia
5 Mar 10
i think you must talk with you sister like you don't have any problem with her, talk with her as someday before you have a problem with her, if your conversation with your sister is coming, so you can asked about that problem, i think she will answer your question i hope you and your sister will be back nice
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
5 Mar 10
Thank you so much for your opinion. I do appreciate that :) I did ask her this morning and as I expected she said nothing and tried to be pretended nothing happened.
@rajaiv0810 (1012)
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
I think you should still exert an effort to speak to her. Maybe there could really be something that you've said or did which hurt your sister and you haven't realized it. And there wouldn't be a way for you to find out if you're not going to talk to her. If she's not ready to speak don't push her hard on the issue then. Just tell her that you're willing to listen for whatever she got in her mind. Tell her how important she is to you and your closeness and you wouldn't want to be destroyed by something you don't know.
1 person likes this
@donna22 (1116)
4 Mar 10
I would try to talk to her to find put what is wrong. At least then you will have tried. If you wait for her to tell you you may be waiting forever. Also, theres the chance that she might be waiting for you to ask her. Step forward. Even if she does not say anything as you suspect, you have tried and thats all you can do really. You do not say how old your sister is. Is she a teenager cos that could explain a lot :)
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
thanks donna for your opinion. I didn't think that she may wait for me to ask it from her. She is 21..
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
4 Mar 10
I think you should at least try talking to your sister even if you believe that she won't open up to you. If she insists that nothing is wrong, let her know that you will be there to listen when she decides that she wants to talk and drop the subject. Continue to be kind to her until then. Maybe she's going through something that has nothing to do with you but is taking it out on you. It's impossible to know until she's ready to talk about it.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
I tried to talk to her (talking about the other stuff) in these days but her response was so bad. So yesterday night I did say nothing to her. I do consider your suggestion Thank you so much for that. I really wish her "windy monsoon" will be end soon
• Canada
4 Mar 10
In my personal opinion I think it is always better to get things out in the open. It is very important to not let resentments build especially between family members as it can manifest itself into something worse. I think that what you need to do is take your sister out somewhere for dinner, or even just for coffee make it laid back and bring up the conversation in passing say something along the lines of what happened to us we used to be so close and see what she has to say.
1 person likes this
4 Mar 10
It's worth a try talking to her.
1 person likes this
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
hi money Then there must be a reason why she act that way, then try to talk and ask her what's the reason and she is mad at you., to correct her if she's wrong,and to stop from being confused. This is usually a common problem for sisters..I hope everything would be alright
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Mar 10
Maybe try asking: Why won't you talk to me? It is worth a try. It couldn't be that bad, if you don't know what happened it's better for you to know being confused like in a mathclass where your lost in the topic
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
4 Mar 10
Hi, thanks for your suggestion. Yeah, I think so..it's worth enough to give a single shot.
@RHIAZAH (26)
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
if you know what happened you should be the to open up or to talk to her maybe she will not say anything, but still if you really love your sister and your bonding you should make it fix you should be the one to make it right becasue your the eldest
1 person likes this
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
maybe you could ask your mom to ask your sister what is wrong and maybe then you can ask your mom about it.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
4 Mar 10
Hi! I would just talk to her and ask her why she's been a bit rude to you lately. Maybe she'll tell you why she has. It could be for none of the reasons you've thought of. Well I hope that you figure it out anyway!
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (166761)
• Boise, Idaho
5 Mar 10
Is there some reason why you can't just ask her? If you feel uncomfortable send her a card. I wouldn't let her get away with the 'nothing' bit. Surely you want a better relationship with her than that. I would ask her straight out. How would you want to be treated? Treat her the same way.
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
For me let say first sorry to her so that she knows that you sad of what you doing to her and said Jehovah God forgive the sin each and everyone of us how much you don't forgive me. Try to tell her that.
1 person likes this
@Ladyslipper (1327)
• Philippines
4 Mar 10
I'd say it's better to ask her so that you can clear things out with her. It's not healthy going on like this especially if you are so close to each other. Tell her that something is bothering you and this is something important to you. Why? First, because she is your sister and you care for her. Second, it's hurting you because you love her. Eventualy, even if she is the silent type she will be opening up to you what happened and what the reason is for the cold shoulder. If you would continue to just ignore this it would continue and might even become worse. She might also think you don't care ant that the sitation does not bother you at all.
1 person likes this
@nangisha (3496)
• Indonesia
4 Mar 10
maybe u can ask your mom for help, maybe your sister will talk. if it not work you can ask for help from your sister best friend. I hope its not a boy thing!