What would you do if your Ex contacted you after several years?

Just accept him as a friend happily but do keep some distance between both you. Don't let him have the chance to hurt you again.

Maybe it is just that you have friends in common. Facebooks is a site where you lose some of your privacy when you accept some contacts. They get out of hand after a while. If you feel like that about your ex, there´s no reason why you have to answer. I wouldn´t. No matter what he says. Take care!

If my ex-boyfriend called me after several years I would want to know why he would want to contact me. I would simply ask him why he sent a message after so long and if your instincts are right and he does want to be a part of your life tell him you are dating someone and be honest say he hurt you and it may be hard to even be friends with him at this point.

I found my first love on facebook he also hurt me many years ago. But i have found him heavensent recently he makes me so happy and i can't believe it has taken this long for us to find each other the world is a small place but we get lost within it. There are plenty of fish in the sea but there is always that 1 that got away. Maybe he really does care and feels sorry for hurting you in the past, or maybe he is a player looking for a new or easy target. It depends on the person and how u feel about them too. Follow your heart your head can be too rational.

maybe he just realized how stupid he was when he left you thats why he tried to win you back. just try to get to know first whats his intention and his attitude towards you. and if you think you really cant accept him then just be frank to him by telling him "no" but then if he tried to do everything to get you back then think about it. in my case my ex came back and he did every thing to win me back and i give him another chance since my boyfriend who happened to be the father of my baby that time also left me without a words. so i was thinking that maybe its a coincidence also since i still have feelings for my ex and so i accepted him again and i his been true to his words as he really change a lot now. and speaking to the father of my baby, if time also come that he will come back in spite of leaving us without any support nor words then perhaps i will give him another chance but not for me but for my baby sake, so he can see or talk to the baby but never to me, theres no way that i will let him come back in my life again.

At this point in time, if my ex would call me I will do nothing. I mean there's nothing special to do. It won't be a big deal for me if he would call because I am now married. Maybe we could be friends.

An ex and I have been 'on and off' for years. Finally we were off for good, and have been for about 4 years. Everytime he splits with his current girlfriend, he gets ahold of me. I don't know why he does, I've finally gotten over him. It's like we are drawn to each other though, and I don't know why. I really don't. As far as being searched for on the net, that's a bit too far. It's not his business if you have webpages or not, and if you do, he shouldn't request you. That choice should be yours. IF you want to add him, YOU add him. That's a bit stalkish if you ask me.

Gee, it sounds like my ex fiance. It took nearly 20 years to get over the hurt from the man, and when I was putting my life back together he contacted me and wanted to get back together. I told him in no uncertain terms that I wasn't going to be second choice and to go somewhere else to find someone to fill the void created by his divorce. I then slammed the phone down on him. With the kind of pain the man inflicted on you, don't be sucked in by kind words and reminders of what was. So what if he is still using that gift that you gave him before you broke up...you're still using the gift he gave you- your freedom. Now answer these questions: Is your life happier without him? Are you really that dumb to go back to a man that made your life a living hell? Are you ready to give up what you worked for the past six years? Does it really matter what he wants? There are a LOT of wonderful men out there, and obviously he isn't one of them if he could make your life a living hell. To be honest with you the only reason I would go near the creep is to vent the anger that is still in my heart for the jerk. I only have one person on the face of the earth that I want to vent all my hate and anger on...and if I were to ever cross paths with him there wouldn't be enough of him left to blot up with a paper towel. Your ex is testing the waters to see if there is a chance for him to connect with you again, because I am sure he hasn't found another woman to put up with his crap. Don't fall for it, just tell him to get lost and don't look back!

That happened to me two years ago. I checked my inbox and I found a note from my Ex with his sweet nothings and an apology about what he did back then which was really terrible, and it's a good thing that I figured out the real him before I said 'I do' in front of a judge in a municipal hall near our university. Anyway, in his note, he even asked, actually 'demanded' that I respond. The nerve of that guy! I replied, but only to tell him that he's not worthy of my time. He sent me a few more notes which I did not respond to. What I did was, I uploaded a photo that shows how happy (and gorgeous!)I have become without him. I guess he just wanted a formal closure, and well, I guess I was just too wise not to give in to what he was asking for.

This has happened to me a few times.. and it didn't used to bother me... until i realized that two of in particular just liked having me around to boost their egos and to be their fallback. .. so i pretty much dont do the reconnect thing anymore.

Well, I'm not really sure. On my part though, I just recently contacted one of my ex. It's just to say Hi really and nothing more. We have both moved on, and I know that he has already forgiven me for whatever it is that I have done to him. I guess, I really did that just to see if we can bring back the friendship that we had before we were a couple, cause we were really great friends, and it's just a shame that that ended because of what happened to our relationship. Maybe he just really wants to say hi, or ask how you are. I mean, a simple message cannot really hurt can it? As long as you're sure that you won't let him into your life the same way again.

If I was you, I would respond and politely say that you wished to be left alone. If he isn't being hostel to you then you shouldn't be hostle back even if you know what type of person he can be at times. You should try a polite method approach in rejecting him before getting angry even though that's obvious how you feel. Relax and take it very slowly.

If that ever happens to me, I won't be putting malice to it. I would just take that she contacted me for old time's sake. As simple as that. I am already in a wonderful relationship. If my ex and I didn't work out then I should be able to learn from it, by making sure that I don't do anything that would make my new love feel insecure or get hurt. What would transpire between me and my ex during that facebook conversation is just as plain as "Hi!" "Hello" and "Goodbye" Just be civil. If she tries to win be back, then she's gonna be blocked from my friend's list. LOLZ.

I think it is a bit creepy. There was a guy I broke up with when I was in my 20's. He looked me up when I was in my 30's. I went out with him again, thinking maybe he wasn't as bad as I thought he was. Besides, people change. I know I did, so I went out with him for a bit. He did improve some, but you know what? He was more abusive than I thought he was. Being older and wiser I noticed things that weren't right that I did not see when I first dated him. Needless to say I broke up with him. About a year or so later, he stopped by my church to give a letter and a cd to my priest to give to me. Since I had moved he could not find me, and I began using a cell phone exclusively because of him. A few years later, he ended up on a message board I belonged to. I recognized his name and some of the twisted theology he holds, and never posted a thing there again. I believe your instincts are correct in that he wants to get back with you to hurt you further. The final decision is up to you.

if i were in the same situation as you are, i will definitely show my ex that i am better off without him. that i am prettier this time and he's such a loser for treating me that way and look what he had "dumped", a treasure! :D

Even if men say that they're extremely simple, they're not at all, and you never know what are they thinking. Something similar happened to me. He just said that he remembered about me and wanted us to be friends again, but in the end what he wanted is to go back with me. I rejected him, of course. If your ex is trying to do this, reject him, as you don't deserve to be hurt again.

If you think that he is trying to do that because he's going to destroy your life again then I cant see any reason for you to be in contact with him. You know him and you know how he is and you know what he is capable of so you'd better be careful. You never know,he might be doing that now just to let you fall again and then give you more heartaches later on. Or if you are tough enough then maybe you can just make some plans and have some connection with him and take the chance of giving him a taste of his own medicine. I dont know if you are that kind of person who wants to get even, cause I am. And if I were in your position, I would do it.

A little bit confusing. Or shocked? or sort of surprised. But for me it wasn't sound more interesting. Past was just gotten away by time, and it was over. Well, for now we don't talk much about the past. And I don't really expect more for him to restore what we had. We both mature and we both busy since we separate ways... though we both single in a away. We ended that way. We still be good friends.

I had a similar situation. Broke up with my ex 5 years ago because he was a jerk and I was naive. Anyway he went back to his homeland but after 6 months he contacted me long distance through my cellphone, then he would call every now and then. He emailed me even when I did not email him back. He came back to my country and he wanted to start all over again but I guess I've had enough and I said no. He kept pestering me that I had to change my cellphone number. He stalked me through my emails so I deleted my email and created a new one. Finally he tracked me in the social sites and eversince I have not opened any of those. I was okay to be his friend but it was another thing to be his girlfriend again. That's something I can't do. Be friends but tell him that's all he could expect from you. If he bothers you change your emails, your phone nos and create a new profile in the social sites. Don't give him false hopes just be straight even if you sound so brutal.At least he would not be having high hopes.

It is your choice because I think it will still depend on how much you love a person regardless if he cause you pain before. Love is more than that it is accepting who he is and hoping he will change. But in your case, if you do not want to get hurt again then I believe you should start moving on because he may be is confuse as well and in a stage that he can not move on by himself. Imagine the opportunity of being free and the chance to choose another person that may love you more and you may love even more than that guy. But even after of all many advises and options that you can choose from, when you love a person... I know you are thinking to reconnect with that person again. Listen to your heart and know where you are happy. Good luck and God bless