Moral dilema
@Weasel_Sponge (1069)
Canada
November 16, 2006 1:01am CST
I recently had an old friend over for dinner, and after dinner we were chatting about what has gone on in our lives since we last saw eachother. He mentioned that he had converted to a different religion, and when I was asking him about it, I realized that one of the dishes I had served had something in it that he is not to eat. I didn't say anything at the time because I didn't want to upset him, but I'm wondering if I should tell him. It's not like I did it on purpose, and he obviously didn't know that what he was eating was not allowed by his beliefs, but should I tell him, or is he better-off not knowing? I think it's wrong to not tell him, but based on the fact that it wasn't his fault, I don't know if it is worth telling him, and possilby causing him turmoil over it.
1 person likes this
7 responses
@Signal20 (2281)
• United States
16 Nov 06
Wow, that's a tough one. Well, since it wasn't done on purpose, and he didn't tell you ahead of time he couldn't eat certain things, really no one's fault. I'm not sure on his religion, but I'm sure he can be "forgiven" for it. But, now you've let some time lapse, and he may get upset that you didn't tell him sooner. I'm sorry, I'm no help, I really don't know how to answer that. Sorry!! maybe post what religion it is, and maybe someone from that religion can advise you on what to do?
@Weasel_Sponge (1069)
• Canada
16 Nov 06
It actually has only been a couple days and he is currently travelling (which is why he stopped by) and I won't be able to reach him until he gets home, in about a week. He's checking his voicemail, but this is definitely something you don't just leave a message about. For what it's worth, he follows the Jewish faith, so if anyone is reading this and has suggestions bases on that, feel free to advise.
@SirElmo (9)
• United States
18 Nov 06
The fact that he didn't tell you before hand puts a lot of the fault on him. If a major change has happened in his life that effects what he can eat, he should have mentioned it before coming over knowing you would be eating.
However, when you found out about it, you should have told them right then. You might want to leave him a voice message asking him to call you so you can tell him as soon as possible.
@HerShe (2383)
• Canada
18 Nov 06
Hi Weasel_Sponge. I don't understand your problem. You said that AFTER dinner he told you that he had changed religions. That would mean that before dinner you didn't know that he had changed religion and therefore how could you have told him about what you were serving before dinner. I suppose you could tell him. I don't think it would matter, because he ate it without knowing what it was. If he had any concerns about what you were serving, he should have told you about his religious beliefs before dinner.
@floramwaters (1595)
• United States
17 Nov 06
I think you should call him when he gets home and say something like this. After you left I was thinking about your new religion and I relized that the dinner I fix had food in it that you could no longer eat. Tell him that you did not want to leave a message like this on his phone. That you really want to be able to tell him your self and not a message. He should be understanding about you not wanting to leave that type of message. All religions have some type of forgiveness. So it should not be that big of a deal because it was not done to go against his believes. It was no ones fult some times things just happen.
@helpful_ideas (1620)
• United States
17 Nov 06
Wow! Good question. I think that telling him eventually in a passing conversation would be cool, like maybe when you are discussing his religion. I know some denominations of certain religions enforce eating restrictions more than others, too.
@inkedmama1111 (824)
• United States
17 Nov 06
I don't think you should tell him. You didn't know ahead of time, and I'm pretty sure he is going to get in big trouble by his religion for slipping up once.
