Just ended, but I feel so bad
By bananamen1
@bananamen1 (442)
Bulgaria
March 29, 2010 3:48am CST
I've just ended a relationship that I know was not good for me or maybe for both parts actually. This is not the 1st break up, we break up several times and every time we decided to be just friends. Well..didn't work, just couldn't be just friends. Anyway, I feel bad and lonely now mostly because I lost a friend, not so much that I've lost a lover. But I know if we continue to talk it will become just the serial break up. In spite of this I'm very tempted now to call and say -let's be just friends. I need someone to pour some common sense in my messy head.
15 responses
@Geomos (322)
• South Africa
29 Mar 10
At least you knew that the relationship was not good for both parties. That is a start. It is very difficult to be friends and lovers and then expect the relationship to continue as "only friends". You might have to be strong and resist the temptation to call and say "Let's just be friends" because that would only help to start the cycle all over again.
You should be trying to change your lifestyle slightly by visiting different restaurants or clubs (or whatever you visit) and by doing that you would meet new friends. Maybe even take a holiday to another country where you can meet people with completely different views. You will probably find it so interesting that your mind will be preoccupied with meeting new people and making new friends.
Good luck
@bananamen1 (442)
• Bulgaria
29 Mar 10
Thank you, I really needed to hear exactly the first part. Because my mind tells me I took the right decision, but my heart don't want to accept it.
@bananamen1 (442)
• Bulgaria
29 Mar 10
Unfortunately I don't have time to socialize a lot. I go to work, then back home, work-home,work-home. I'm a single mom with little child and it's hard to find a time for myself.
@HOW2DO (226)
• India
30 Mar 10
First thing you have to realise that it is painful that a loved one relationship is break up.It may hurt both of you but the one thing you have to understand that friend didn't understand you all the time.So think again to love that person again because there may be a chance repeating the same mistakes again.So try to make friend if that person comes with true friendship and forgiveness.If you continue again with friendship you should have to much care about not to break up again.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
Just take some time and realize that it's normal. we all feel that way when we're rejected or dumped. just do some things that would keep you busy. it could help you go through the day without thinking about it.
@bananamen1 (442)
• Bulgaria
29 Mar 10
Thank you for your response! Yeah probably you're right some time has to pass, even now I feel a little bit better.
@lingli_78 (12822)
• Australia
29 Mar 10
i think time is the best medicine to heal a broken heart... i'm sorry to hear about what is happening to your relationship... but i believe that you will be able to get over it as time passes by and move on with your life... just try to do something that you like and keep yourself busy to try to forget about this incident... take care and have a nice day...
@mr_pearl (5018)
• India
29 Mar 10
I think, you have taken the right decision if there were many break-ups followed by patch ups in the past. There is no use staying in such a realtionship. And your decision to break all communication with him is wiser one...
The fact is, if both of you get in touch with each other again, the same thing will happen, which you (and he too, I guess) dislike... So why contact? Lets be a little practical...
I know it is hard for you to stay away from your love... But hey, there are other things in the world, too... Indulge yourself in the world... do what you like! You like reading or cooking etc? Yes! then, do it... Keep yourself busy with something... And with time, all will be well...
Good Luck and have a nice time!
@maanrodriguez (604)
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
it's not easy to get over someone. it will take time and tears and sad days. keep in mind that it is okay to cry sometimes, there's no crime in that. if today you felt like crying, then go ahead and do so. claim your emotions. one day you'll realize you actually feel much much better already. take care!
@myramae19 (667)
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
It hurts at first...but, you'll get use to it, time will heals everything.
How could you move on..if you're going to ask her back now??? allow time to pass by, and there you would realize if you could live or couldn't live with out that friend of yours!..
But, allow some time first friend
It's normal to feel lonely now, cheer up!
It's normal to feel lonely now, cheer up!
@xtremelyperfect (94)
• Malaysia
29 Mar 10
Be strong!
It's just a phase. You can have friends everywhere.
@umit_umit (1984)
• India
29 Mar 10
well its very sad that when arelationship ends its very painfull but what happens happens for the good only!
@sylqqmedin (116)
• Bulgaria
29 Mar 10
Every break up is painful.As time go on,your wounds will be healed.You've got to be outgoing.Find yourself time and spend it with your closest friends.
Communicate with them,share what exactly you're feeling.Everything will be all right.
;)
@chairine (1)
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
true, its pretty hard to manage a break-up when you were too attached to that person, my boyfriend was my former "shoulder to cry on" type of friend,, after all of our precious times,, it end up NOTHING!!!
its hard =(
