When does friendship ends?

@setsuna26 (2751)
Philippines
March 29, 2010 9:17pm CST
I have lots of friends all my life but there are few whom i cherish alot, makes me feel good and makes me feel happy whenever im sad. But sometimes these friends are the main reason why i feel so bad, the feeling of your friend not able to understand your true feelings hurt me alot.Now i ask you my mylot friends when does friendship ends? or does it end at all? if someone whom you call a friend keeps on hurting you is he still worth calling a friend?
2 people like this
26 responses
@irent23 (148)
• Dubai, United Arab Emirates
7 Apr 10
It ends when you don't feel happy about the friendship you are into. Why it ends? maybe because of the grudges of both parties. She/he hurt her/him in a way that the friendship that they are sharing was greatly affected or by some reasons that they don't want to happen but it happens without their control. If that's the situation, I can say that friend is not worth my friendship. I know that it hurts me that much but I should let her/him go. Moving on is the best solution to that..enjoy mylotting!
1 person likes this
@joepat (129)
• Philippines
7 Apr 10
Hi setsuna26 and hello to irent23. Do you really want to know what a true friend is and what friendship really means? A friend is someone who is always there for you through thick or thin. That someone may be your dad or mom or kin or just anybody whom one can always rely on anytime especially when the chips are down meaning when times get rough and they are always there to give help even without being asked. A friend may be human or could be your pet animal, cat, dog, bird, whatever, whom you can pour out your problems and sentiments without expecting anything in return except a listening ear. A friend is a shoulder you can cry on. And friendship is a bond, a relationship where no amount of betrayal nor intrigue can crumble. It is an attachment between individuals based on blood relations, camaraderie, fraternity or even love. If this relationship exist between people of all races then who needs war?
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
7 Apr 10
Yes i believe thats what we really need to do,to at least move on and carry on with our lives instead of thinking bout something thats not going to happen anymore. Thank you for sharing your attention and thoughts with this topic of mine , it means alot to me.
@Ysabel (1201)
• Philippines
6 Apr 10
For me, friendship end when there's betrayal. It is very valuable to have loyalty, faithfulness even in friendship. And for me, this is non-negotiable. Something that is always there, no matter what. And when a friend betrays me, i could not forgive. If time permits, I may forgive but not forget. So if this happens, i could no longer continue with the friendship.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
6 Apr 10
I have to agree with you when betrayal is committed friendship will fall. We should trust each other no matter what thats the essence of being a friend, how would you be able to call someone a friend if he or she keeps on hurting or betraying you. It might be a lil bit too much but if the foundation of friendship is shaken then if not mended it is bound to fall. Again thank you for your comment and ideas ysabel hoping to see more of you in my other topics too. Yeah you are right lets help each other out! glad to have friends like you in this site
@mr_pearl (5018)
• India
30 Mar 10
Hello... I think you know the answer to this question and you need to confirm it from your friends on myLot... Friendship between two people means mutual understanding, caring, looking after each other, trust, faith etc... If your friend fails to understand you frequently, then it can't be called friendship... If someone acts with me that way, I give up on that person for life... Respect can't be demanded, not from friends, at least...
@mr_pearl (5018)
• India
4 Apr 10
yes, I think whatever you are going to do is sane, if you believe in yourself. Confidence is the key here. From your post, it is quite clear that some person in your life doesn't care much about you. I don't see any reason to continue with it, because any such continuation is going to damage your self-esteem and pride- that is real dangerous.... Take care...
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
Thats exactly what im thinking bout, i just want to find out if what im about to do is pretty much sane and normal for someone whose pretty much hurt ... Thank you for responding my friend ;)
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
4 Apr 10
Again thank you for the reply and i will take your advice into consideration . Its really hard when your dealing with this kind of situation .Its as if your disowning your own brother thats the effect on me. Thank you again my friends
@sender621 (14893)
• United States
30 Mar 10
Only your heart knows when a frriendship truly ends. It is painful for friendships of any kind to come to and end. When the love and trust that was such a soecial bond becomes broken, it is the beginning of the end. Some friendships can stand the test of time. These are the moments we treasure, good or bad.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
Indeed i believe ending friendships especially long ones is pretty much painful but when its not working anymore id rather end it now or be hurt with it everyday .Small sacrifice are needed for life to move on Thanks for commenting and sorry for the late reply my friend ;)
@sender621 (14893)
• United States
3 Apr 10
Your thoughts are very moving. Thank you for responding. It is appreciated.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
4 Apr 10
My words ring a bell to our hearts because as we are talking and exchanging ideas i can still fell the pain that this friend of mine caused me. I gave him almost all of the keys in my life , trusted like a brother, and he just blocked me away just like a nobody is his life. I feel betrayed by this act but life has to move on. Thats why i just cant thank you enough people who gave your opinion, your words of encouragement and wisdom makes me even more stronger to face reality and life itself. God bless and happy mylotting
@joepat (129)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
Friendship ends where betrayal begins. But this does not necessarily mean that one becomes an enemy of the other. Both could still be friends but on a different level of relationship or cordiality. For example, an incident of hurt may alienate the other like avoiding his company or withholding a certain amount of closeness from the offending party. Of course an apology is expected and usually accepted unless the hurt is too much to merit revenge and therefore friendship is altogether lost. In this case, for civilized people, the best way is to just avoid each other's company.
@joepat (129)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
Friendship is like your favorite food - it's good while it last. But when the relationship turns sour, why do you have to stay around and suffer. Move on with your life, look further beyond. Who knows, you may even meet a more wholesome friend/s who will shower you with the love, trust and endearment you deserve. Your feeling of being unwanted is just temporary and sooner or later will fade as a thing of the past.
@irent23 (148)
• Dubai, United Arab Emirates
7 Apr 10
great respond joepat...like it!*wink^_^
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
31 Mar 10
Thats what i just experienced,i mean i was betrayed by the one i really look up to and trusted the most. Thats why i feel this bad about this situation and im having a hard time moving on.
• United States
7 Apr 10
you need to talk to him why he keeps on doing it to you. from there you will find out why then you can decide either to still stick with him as your friend or just keep a distant from him. friends come and go sometime some of them leave good memories to cherish and some leave you a scars. if you are not in good friends then stay away from them why do you allow people to hurt when you are not hurting them..? you must have friend that makes your life happy, learn from and grow with them. not to give you destructions or hurt feelings.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
7 Apr 10
I really want to find out whats wrong too, but the thing is he blocked me out from all his contacts already. I cant call him email him even facebook accounts were blocked too. And i dont want to insist on something that will never be repaired anymore. I just think its time to move on and just let him be with the decision that he made. Although im just clueless about what really happend to us...
@jugsjugs (12967)
30 Mar 10
I think that a friendship ends or finishes when the so called friend starts being two faced or if you find out they have been stabbing you in the back aswell as if the person makes arrangements all the time with you and then keeps letting you down and worse still if they let you down at the last minuite,not just once but loads of times as in the end you know they are not a true friend and that you are being used as all the other times they had nothing else better todo.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
Sorry for the late reply but i think your right , when a friend starts stabbing your back then you should start thinking if the said friendship is even worth it at all.Im hurting alot because this friend is doing all sorts of wrong thing to me. Now because of what you people are telling me my mind is clearer, thank you for your time commenting and for participating friend ;)
• United Arab Emirates
30 Mar 10
I would say good freinds are rare now, todays freinds are mean and they hurt...
@jugsjugs (12967)
30 Mar 10
Most of them are like that and alot of them you are better off without them.
@lady1993 (27224)
• Philippines
6 Apr 10
I don't think friendship ever ends, unless you make it official by saying to your friend that you are not friends anymore..even if you lost contact or that certain friend "disappears"; when you see each other again, it'll be like old times...friendship is one of the best relationships people have, even if friends may hurt you, don't give up on your friendship- when it's broken, it's hard to mend.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
6 Apr 10
But the problem is what if its broken already? even if i want to fix it its just so hard to fix anymore. And my friend blocked every communication and any social network that we have with each other, i think theres no other way anymore but to just call it over. Anyways i still have alot of friends with me and thats what matters the most . Thanks for joining
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
In my opinion, friendship has no ending for as long as you can stay connected with each other. I have lots of friends from school, work and those I met on some social occasions. But I only cherish a few. True friends for me are those who can manage to keep a contact with me no matter how far we are from each other. They may not be physically available for me due to distance, but they can keep their contact with me thru phone calls, text messages, or online means (i.e emails, YM, Skype, Facebook etc). They are always there for me at times that I need them most -- may not be physically present but it's alright simply knowing that they care for me. I have not experienced having a friend who hurt me so much. So I'm not in the position to say yet if friendship is worth ending for if that is the case. I guess the decision is all up to you based on the extent of you getting hurt by a dear friend. If you think you can't take the hurt anymore, it's maybe better to end the friendship. But of course, think 100x first before you do it. The friendship can still be repaired somehow but then it's only you who know what's best for you & for your friendship. :)
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
4 Apr 10
I know frienship still lives for as long as you have communication, but in my situation my friend is the one who blocked everything and severed our ties. Thats why even if i want to talk to him email him it wont be possible, thats why im hurting alot i dont know the reason but he blocked everything.Thats why somehow i feel betrayed. Thank you for taking your time to read and participate my friend
@paopao11 (10)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
where is the true meaning of friendship if you cant turn on or if you cant count on to him or her.. the word friends it involves sharing, consoling, cheering up in order to pull and push you up and never makes you down but if things doesn't exist what was the sense of being friends, if you're not happy at all?
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
Hello paopop, thats what im longing for right now but sadly he just deprived me of those feelings that he should give to a friend. I think its just better to move on and just treat him as a memory of the past instead ;) thank you for participating my friend
• Germany
31 Mar 10
friendship will never ends;D friends who disappear from you or friends who hurting you is not someones who valuable in your life.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
I know when a friend is doing those bad stuff to you thats the time they are no longer your friend anymore. A friend should consider the feeling of his friends no matter what, now if he dont value that anymore then its not worth calling friendship anymore. Thank you for responding to my topic ;)
@greyz7 (859)
• Philippines
1 Apr 10
i think friendship ends when the trust is badly shuttered and when the other one leaves the place for a job and when there is no communication anymore..because for me, communication is vital in a relationsip/friendship..if the other person stops communicating, no matter how hard the other person extends the communication process, still it's crucial..when communication stops and trust are broken, the friendship ends.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
1 Apr 10
Hello greyz im glad that your taking your time reading some of my comments and topics.And i have to say im impressed with your answer on this one. The reason why i posted this because a good friend of mine betrayed me big time...Glad to have you as a friend in mylot! thanks for the comment and happy mylotting!
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
i think friendship never ends, it just a matter that your communication gone but when the time come and you see each other you will have a couple of minute or maybe hour to talk and give some latest info about yourself, for me friendship is for eternal!
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
How i wish thats the situation my friend but this one right now its different, he blocked me from his social networks and dont answer txts and emails that im sending him. if you dont call that betrayal i dont know what to call it anymore. Thanks for giving me some of your time my friend and enjoy my lotting!
@chiyosan (30183)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
for me, i think friendship never really ends when you still keep in touch no matter how far you are from each other. the closeness may fade, but this can be regained, the communication may lessen but we can still catch up when we meet.... Sometimes we just grow out of the bonding we used to have years back. friendship like flower needs nourishment, daily watering, daily sunlight, otherwise it may die. So if you totally forget all about your friend, the friendship may just not be there anymore and you will be less comfortable with each other when you meet again.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
If thats the scenario i will have to agree with you too distance wont be a problem at all .But in my scenario the friend itself is causing pain to you. Hes hurting you with all his actions i dont know if its intentional but hes hurting me with what and how hes reacting , can you still consider someone like that a friend?
@chavezrmc (6095)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
A friend is someone who is always there through good and bad times. Can accept you for wheoever you are and don't change you for the friend he/she wanted in their lives, Love, trust and respect must always be present. when a friend started to do something against your views you can always give them a few chances after we are all humans we do make mistakes. Communication must always be open from both sides. But when things are getting worst that's only the time you can give up on a friend. You will not be guilty of ending a friendship coz u have done your best to save it. Be patient after all that's what friends are for... when things got worst then give yourself a break.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
Yeah i think thats what i should do , give myself a break and try to find some other ways to divert my attention. its get pretty bad and sad when someone betray you just like that specially a very dear friend
@enciel (368)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
I totally understand what you mean. I think when your communication is cut that's when friendship starts to dwindle. You lose contact and you lose information on what is happening on that person's life and vice versa. I think it is inevitable that some friends will just fade away due to schedules and different life choices. But sometimes friends can still come across that. Constant communication is important.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
Yeah it breaks my heart to lose a friend but what can we do thats how life if.Its more like losing a brother thats what i feel now that i lost our friendship its pretty hurting me everytime i remember it.
@aries12 (60)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
friendship ends when both of you stops to make you relation ship going......... friends are easily to find but true friends are really hard to look for them.........
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
What if its just the other one who stopped? can you still call it friendship? or am i being selfish for still hoping that the friendship will be saved?
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
I think friendship ends when the trust between you and her is already gone or broken. for me, if you can't trust your friend anymore then there will be a gap between you and i think that is the start of your friendship to diminished.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
3 Apr 10
Thats what im thinking bout too, maybe he for some reason dont trust me anymore and it will be pretty much wrong for me to still hope for any continuity i just have to move on with life and find my own happiness again. Thank you for participating my friend ;)
• United States
30 Mar 10
I have my close friends, I have my friends and then I have my girlfriend. Girlfriend is only between me and her, close friends aren't even as close as you might think they are and friends are simply people I talk more often than not. There is one good reason to never have REALLY close friends, especially if it's more than one, and that's because friendships tend to end on non-mutual terms quite often. It's not to say you're better off not having friends that care in the first place but you got to be careful on who you're sharing your things with. It could lead you open to some big hurt in the long run.
@setsuna26 (2751)
• Philippines
30 Mar 10
And thats what happened to me i totally got too close to a friend to the point that we shared so much together. Now that things are getting worse for us its as if i lost a brother and its very painful and im having a hard time coping with it.