Part II: URGENT PRAYERS: This is for my cat Pyewacket
By pyewacket
@pyewacket (43903)
United States
April 20, 2010 5:49pm CST
By this time many of my friends do know what happened to my beloved Pyewacket but for those who don't want to share the sad news.
On Monday, April 19th around 5:20 a.m. is when it happened. As many of my friends know I'm a night owl and was still awake and sitting in front of the TV. Pyewacket was sauntering about in his usual manner, I called him and he came running over to me and started cuddling up with me. About ten minutes later he made a horrible howling as if in pain. I asked him what's wrong and tried to sooth him. Since I have a tad know how in vet care I was running around like a maniac trying to think of things to do...his breathing seemed hard so I quick heated up water and put some Vick's Vapor rub in it to see if that would open up his lungs if he was having some respiratory problem--I also was messaging him, soothing him.
For awhile he seemed to perk up. While all this was going on, I rushed and posted my URGENT PRAYERS post here...odd how I first thought to ask for prayers here. I got back to him and continued to soothe and message him, but I felt and knew he was going--I've witnessed this too many times with my former cats to know the end was near. I continued to soothe him, call his name, picked him up and held him close to me, like one holding a baby, and he was in a sense my baby. Then he was gone at around 6:15 a.m. My dear Pyewacket was forever gone from my life.
I didn't go to bed on Monday until a little after 12 noon..and not to sleep though, couldn't...Kissy, my other kitty cuddled up with me the whole time I was in bed..I was a zombie when I woke up and didn't even want to get out of bed. I still expected to see Pye around.
I'm not taking Pyewacket's passing very well. When my mother died I handled it better as she had been sick for near a year, and then when she went into the hospital for the last time and was in a coma for two weeks, it prepared me. But I just wasn't prepared for Pyewacket's death due to the suddenness of it.
I woke up today and had to force myself to be "functional"--I even had to go out and as I did my errands I felt my legs were like jello..I tried to have a pasted smile on my face to not let people know how I was feeling.
I'm in the process of making "arrangements" for Pyewacket. I live in an apt building so no backyard to bury him, so I found one place that can pick him up, cremate him and send his ashes back....he needs a dignified means and wonderfully, many of my on-line friends are helping out with the costs, since I'm on SSI benefits and limited funds. Thank you thank you thank you...you know who you are that are helping me and words cannot express my deep gratitude.
I know many of my friends out there are pet lovers and have suffered losses of their "babies"---It never gets easy to lose a cherished furbaby does it? If you wish, tell me of how you felt. Did friends understand your grief? Yes fellow pet lovers will, but how about non-pet owners? Did they think you were deranged for being in grief over a pet?
RIP~~Pyewacket June 11, 2001~~April 19, 2010
22 people like this
40 responses
@moondancer (7433)
• United States
21 Apr 10
Honey, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I know that no words can comfort you right now. You know I lost my precious boy a couple of weeks ago.
I have a feeling that I know some of what you are going through. I was the same way. I still am to a huge degree. I go into these silent moments that last sometimes all day.
It is so hard to loss our babies.
We become so very close to them. They ARE our babies. Some people understand this and some don't. My friends and others that know me, they know how I am about my babies. They are a huge integral part of our family.
I'm lucky that everyone in m,y family feel the same way about the babies we all have. We all feel the loss of Ninja.
Please know my heart and thoughts are with you. A candle is lit for you and my prayers will not cease for you to find the comfort and some sort of acceptance that you need.
Hugs to you.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
21 Apr 10
Thank you moondancer. Yes, I know of your recent loss and yes, our "babies" really are our children and part of the family. Thankfully, I have so many on-line animal lovers who understand what I'm going through...oddly enough, it's the people in my "real" life who don't since many aren't pet lovers--they tend to think "Oh it's only an animal" so isn't surprising I'm not too friendly with them--they just don't understand
1 person likes this
@moondancer (7433)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I'm so sorry that you have no support from the ones around you physically. It is a sad thing that these people just do not understand what your baby means to you. Animal lovers or not, they should know how you feel about your babies and respect that fact and offer the support that you need.
I know people like this as well and like you I am not close to these people. Most people I know love their babies just as we do.
It irritates me to see what some of my neighbors do with their pets, because that's all they are to them unless they tick them off for some reason and then they are gone all of a sudden. These kind of people don't deserve the love and loyalty of the babies they have and have had.
Try to hang in there. Pye would not want you to be sad and hurting. Neither do I.
2 people like this
@quita88 (3715)
• United States
21 Apr 10
My heart soo goes out to you. As you know I'm an animal lover like you are. I too lost a cat not too long ago but really was expecting it and she went quietly and that was good. KiKi was hubby's cat and hubby himself is an ivalid and neither of us thought we could bury our beloved KiKi so I asked the neighbor across the street.
My hubby wrapped KiKi in a blanket and buried her himself while I had to go run some errands.
It was amazing that hubby was able to pull that much strength together to get her buried and let her rest at last.
Yes, people think I'm nuts for loving my animals and just Sunday somebody dumped a black lab pup here and I have taken her in :) she is fed and loved but I cannot let her in yet as she eats things LOL
But, my prayers were answered for a puppy:0) and now my aunt is telling me how stupid I am for taking in another dog.
I feel good about taking her in! I would die to think she was out in the street homeless and no food.
She's safe here:)
TAke care sweetie, God has his plans and you will be rewarded for your caring and loving of Pye:)
God Bless,
quita
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
21 Apr 10
It's hard even when a pet gets sick and one can kind of expect their passing...but was really hard for me to deal with since this was so sudden..thought I would have so many years more with my Pyewacket.
I'm glad to hear that your prayers where answered and your new puppy is in your life. I'm hoping perhaps I might get another black cat like Pye too. so who knows?
@quita88 (3715)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I can only imagine how hard it was to deal with Pye going so quickly. Yes, KiKi took a while to die but we made her comfortable and warm.
I understand thinking about a new cat but give that some time and don't replace Pye with just any cat. It has to be special.
This pup tho about 6 months old was JUST here.............I had asked God to bring me a pup, a dog and here she is.
But you take time for a mourning period and let the thoughs of another cat take it's time in coming.
Bless you and prayers,
quita
1 person likes this
@Polly1 (12645)
• United States
21 Apr 10
Oshy just told me about you kitty. I am so sorry, I just lost my Polly today too. It was expected with her, she was about 16 yeas old. She lived a good long life. I do miss her and at the same time I am relieved for her. I have beep praying that God would just let her go to sleep and not wake up. Take care.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
23 Apr 10
I'm so sorry to hear about your Polly. We both are sharing a loss
@saigonwarrior (1331)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I am so sorry to hear about your dear sweet pet. I know how much you cherished Pye and was just shocked, he was so young and it was so sudden.
All I can say is I am sorry and hope that you are able to heal soon and not hurt so badly.
My heart goes out to you.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
22 Apr 10
Yes it was so sudden...I thought I had many more years with Pyewacket
@nova1945 (1612)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I am so sorry for your loss. I have lost many of my extended family (dogs and cats)over the years, the last one being just a year ago. Bandit was almost 20 years old and was born under my bed in California. She had a long and good life and I miss her, but having another kitty (that Bandit helped raise) actually did help to fill the hole that losing her created. But it never gets easier to lose a friend.
Time will help to heal the pain, but the memories will last forever. May they all be good ones.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
22 Apr 10
I guess I'm so affected by it all since it was so unexpected and sudden. Yes, I've lost so many "babies" since I've had pets since I was five years old
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
21 Apr 10
Oh Sweetheart,
As all your friends here, my heart is breaking for you. I know how much Pye meant to you so I know how deep the pain goes. Don't worry or think twice about what anyone else thinks if they see you in pain. Pye was the center of your world and everyone who loves their fur babies know your pain. It was only a year and a half when I lost my precious Bogie. You and everyone here that I know and love helped me get through his loss. That is what we are here to do now. My heart aches for you Sweetie. I wish I could help you financially but I'm afraid it will have to be my love and prayers that I send you. Just take it one step at a time. Believe me the pain will subside a little as each day passes. But every time you think of Pye, your heart will always ache a little. But eventually all your memories will put a smile on your face. I don't know what else to say except I will be close by.
Love You
Leenie
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
22 Apr 10
Thank you leenie50 and I'm glad we were there for you when your Bogie passed on to Rainbow Bridge. I guess I'm feeling it more since it was so sudden, but at least I was there for Pyewacket during his final moments
1 person likes this
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
22 Apr 10
Melanie,
The strange thing is, My Bogie went in a similar manner as Pye. He suddenly started to act like he was having a siezure and then he seemed paralysed. I grabbed him up in his blanket and hubby drove us to the vet. While I was dealing with the receptionist, they took Bogie to the back room and the Vet came out and told me he had been poisoned. She said he wasn't going to make it. I wanted to go back with him but for some reason they delayed me from being with him. By the time I got back to him he was gone. It was so sudden that it was difficult to understand. I was angry that I was prevented from being there with him.
I hope you are feeling a bit better.
Hugsss
Leenie
1 person likes this
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
23 Apr 10
I've wondered that off and on since then. Maybe they didn't want me to see him in that condition. But I kept saying I want to get in to be with Bogie and she just kept asking me questions about what I don't know. But All I wanted to do was hold him. He was a mini dachshund. I love my Dexter (a shi tzu) but Bogie always had my heart completely.
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
21 Apr 10
Pye I am so sorry about this
I have sent you an Email, you know that Pyewacket is now over the Rainbow Bridge but he is also very close to you Sweet
He is here as well
this is not a Referral Link
http://www.freewebs.com/gabs8513/memorialpageoffriends.htm
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
27 Apr 10
Aww--thanks for remembering Pye on your website..am sending a picture of him..my avatar photo isn't him...LOL
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160600)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I am sad for you Pye. It sounds as if he might have had a urinary blockage. I lost one like that. It does seem almost as if you still see them there. Peace to you and prayers my friend.
1 person likes this
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
21 Apr 10
Oh Girl I'm so sorry.He will Always be with you in spirit, I Know that. If you need to talk , send me a private message. You are not alone . We all share your grief. Just take it one moment at a time.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
21 Apr 10
I am with you in your moments of grief. I am also still grieving for my pet mongolian dog who has been run over by a truck in front of my house a few days ago. He is the only one that is guarding the house day and night and with his demise I am left with no security guard for my house. But luckily I still have 4 indoor dogs that can pacify me of this lost.
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
21 Apr 10
It's not easy...I still have sadness over former cats that passed on many years ago..some just strike a stronger bond that others
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
21 Apr 10
As I read your discussion, my eyes filled with tears and I almost never cry. The last time I did, was probably when I lost my 3 babies. They were from the same mother and 2 from the same litter. They all got cancer and I finally had to put them to sleep. They were all gone within months of each other. I had time to prepare for the end but it was still hard. A few non-pet people didn't understand why I was so upset over losing an animal. Some people suggested that I replace them. I never did. They were all so special in their own ways, I didn't think they could be replaced and I still don't! That's like losing a child and saying "Well you have another one so you shouldn't miss the one you lost".
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
27 Apr 10
When I start "healing" more I actually am thinking of getting another kitty, if anything to keep my one remaining cat company. She probably misses him too.
@EvrWonder (3571)
• Canada
28 Apr 10
R.I.P Pye.
My heart is with you hon.
There are never any words appropriate to say how sorry we feel for you, for your loss.
I am so not good with any one passing.
I have had friends, family and pets pass and the result for me, for several days, sometimes weeks is a zombie. Dumb founded. Can not speak. In a total daze.
I still think about pets I have had that passed and can this day bring tears to my eyes.
That was some fifteen to twenty years ago too.
I recall being at a friends memorial, crying. Another friend there attending said to me to stop crying, that it was selfish.
I have always thought about that and can hear him saying that to me.
He was right, in a sense.
I mean if Pye was in any pain, he certainly isn't anymore.
You have another angel, a sweet loving angel, looking down on you now.
Bless your heart.
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
22 Apr 10
I am so sorry for your cat...it is so hard to lose someone that is so close to you. I know your pain is deep and time is the only thing that will help but try to remember that Pyewacket is not truly gone...when your time here is through you will be reunited.
When I lost my Petey, I was just like you. I couldn't eat, sleep or even function, all I could do was lie there and cry. It felt like a piece of my heart had been ripped out. There were only 3 things that pulled me through...the poem of the Rainbow Bridge, knowing that I'd see my Petey again one day and I talked to him...I keep a photo of him by my bed and every night I talk to him...I tell him how much I miss him and love him...it really does help.
I hope you find some comfort here and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your dear Pyewacket. Hugs!!
[b]**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~[/b]
@irishmist (3814)
• United States
23 Apr 10
I am so sorry for your loss. I was so surprised to find out that Pye had passed away. I hope you are doing okay, though I know it must be really hard for you right now. Thank goodness you have Kissy to comfort you in this time of sadness.
@writersedge (22563)
• United States
21 Apr 10
Normally, I do pretty well because I have my rescue cats for such a short period of time less than 1 to 4 years, that I'm not as attached. I see yours was 9 years. I also used to be working and at college, so didn't see them much. But I've had baby since 1998. I've been home and out of work a lot since I've had him. He's my best buddy. He became so attached, he chased my car down the road one time. I had to stop my car and bring him home. He likes to sleep with us. So this cat, it's going to hurt. It's really, really going to hurt.
@writersedge (22563)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I'm sorry for your loss. It sounds like Pyewacket was such a wonderful and dear friend. You thought so much of Pye that you named yourself that here.
I'd help out $ wise, too, but I don't have enough money to pay my bills. I'm not sure how I'm making it through the month. This $3.01 to $3.05 a gallon in gass is killing me.
I'm sooo glad others are able to help you. I hope you are comforted by the support here. Take care. Peace and love to you.
@K46620 (1986)
• United States
22 Apr 10
I'm sorry to hear this.
The same thing happened to our cat- Jasmine- in May 2004. She was fin then suddenly within less than an hour she weakened and passed away. It was quite a shock.
Once difference though is that she was nearly 17 years and 5 months old.