A point of view
By savypat
@savypat (20216)
United States
May 14, 2010 1:34pm CST
I have a story that shows how we are ruled by our points of view. (A women lives in and apartment in a large city and a man lives above her. Now like many such places the walls are very thin and so is the flooring. These people can easily hear what is going on in each other's apartment. The woman works during the day at a very stressful job and often works overtime and week-ends. the man works nights and seem to often work in his apartment. The woman hates this man, he is up all night, his phone rings at all hours, he steals her paper early in the morning and does his laundry in the basement, often leaving his clothing around for days. He is totally inconsiderate as a neighbor. The man thinks the woman is a total looser, she works long hours and week-ends, never seem to enjoy herself always does the same thing at the same time. She talks to her mother for hours about nothing and is a total bore.)
Now isn't this so true of all of us, we judge others who we have never met by what we can observe.
The two people above stumble into each other one day and in the world of fiction find true love.
Of course that doesn't happen to us often, but by reading about this situation doesn't it make you want to maybe take another look at folks around you and get to know them a little better? Blessings
7 people like this
14 responses
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
14 May 10
If we would do that there wouldn't be so much conflict in the world!
A lot of times I'll hear complaints about a person--a neighbor, a sibling, a friend--and I'll ask if they've talked to the person about the problem. The answer is usually no! People should talk to each other more.
2 people like this
@flowerchilde (12529)
• United States
15 May 10
Absolutely! I'm all for cutting people some slack, after all none of us are perfect or w/o flaw.. And I like the old saying "there are no strangers just friends we've yet to meet"..
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
15 May 10
Interesting story of how it 'all begun'. Love is something we can't define why and when it happen. We are all affected and infected by the people around us and despite not hopeful for the blossoming of love to the person we despise because of attitude problem but fate had it that the heart has every reason not to listen to the head. Like the pull of magnetic force, like pole repel, unlike pole attract and this story is a fine fine example of the happy endings of two people with different attitudes.
1 person likes this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
15 May 10
You are so right, pat. I’ve found myself doing the same thing, judging someone in my mind to be a certain way only to discover that individual is nothing like I presumed that person to be! I don’t know why human nature does that. It causes people to wear ‘masks’ when out in the world in order to portray an image that is ‘acceptable’ because folks are so quick to judge. You know the saying, “You shouldn’t judge another person until you’ve walked in his shoes for two weeks ...” it is true because, let’s face no one know is really ever going to know what it’s like being anyone else doing what they do
1 person likes this
@hala718 (4)
• United States
15 May 10
I totally agree. we usually judge people when we first meet them without knowling really who they are or how they think. You would find it very common to judge a person based on the first impression and then became your close friend. It happens to us a lot. That is why we worry so much about our first impression on people when having a job interview, meeting someone, or just in public. Because we know that we will be judged based on how we look and what we do.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160720)
• United States
14 May 10
We need to look with our eyes, minds and hearts. Otherwise we are making snap judgments and missing many wonderful parts of life. I do not mean to imply that everything will always be rosy and good, but it certainly can at least be an improvement.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
14 May 10
Hi savypat, You are absolutely right, it seems we do that all the time. We judge people without really knowing them and certainly without knowing anything about their past. I remember someone once telling me how awful a certain person was, there just wasn't one good word she could use to describe her. Sometime later I was talking with another lady and the same person's name came up. You could never imagine they were talking about the same person! Kind, considerate, loving, were just a few of the adjectives used to describe the same person about whom another couldn't think of one good thing to say. I suspect the first person just didn't take the time to get to know the lady and I think at some time, that is true of all of us. Blessings.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
14 May 10
Not at all what I expected. :-)
At work once, I was in a meeting, which was being run by this guy who came across as a totally arrogant azz. I disliked him at first sight. One of those people who act like your long lost best friend 2 minutes after you meet. But it turned out that I really ended up liking him and we are still friends 20 years later. So yeah, sometimes you judge people and find that you're totally wrong once you get to know them.
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
14 May 10
Hi, savypat. This reminds me of my old downstairs neighbor. He never took the time to get to know us. He would complain about the noise that is coming from above him. Which was from our apartment. If he had to get to know us better from the start, then he would have have discovered that we did not mean him any harm whatsoever. We were decent folks that were nice and caring. He was just so disturbed by the noise that he judged us by that. Which was very unfair. Whenever he would make any noise in his apartment, we never once disrespected him. We compromised with this guy without him even realizing it. If he is gone, which I am glad that is. But he left without ever getting to know me at least. He did talk with my husband, only because my husband's dad did some work for his family a while back.. For the ones that try to get to know others, is being fair. But for the ones that are so quick to judge one another, without getting to know them first, is just pitiful.
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
15 May 10
Hey pat! What a nice story, at least the ending was! I used
to "see" my strange next door neighbor for awhile many years
ago! It was a bit after his breakup with his girlfriend! We
were always friends, but we started "seeing" each other, but
it was always a bit weird, us living right next door to each
other! He is eight years younger than I am and very intelligent,
has a Doctor's Degree in Computer Science! So, it never really
got anywhere, but we are still friends at least! He is still
a "weird" guy who keeps to himself, no girlfriend since the
last one and that was many years ago! So, you just never know!
I am still very fond of this guy, although I live with someone
right now. Am glad that we at least were able to remain friends!
1 person likes this
@chibiXpudding (340)
• United States
14 May 10
Yes, I definitely agree with your conclusion from the above story. People are truly ruled by points of view, and that's how most conflicts occur.
One person looks at an issue or en event, has his thoughts, and makes his decisions on what to do about it. Another person comes along, and has his own thoughts. But if those thoughts and decisions don't agree, conflict tends to happen.
That's just the way our minds work, but it would be simply amazing if everyone took the time to get to know others before making judgements.
1 person likes this
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
14 May 10
That's true. We only believe what we see and refuse to go deeper into understanding another person cuz it's a lot easier. We save ourselves time to think for something more important, or so we thought, cuz it's also important if we understood each other more clearly. Good day sir!
1 person likes this
