adopted child...when is the right time to tell that he/she was an adopted child?

this situation is very difficult. this all depend on what kind of child is she. is she sweet and understanding then you can tell it to her already. is she somehow very soft and gets teary eyed at once then you have to say it gradually. or she can invent a story and tell her a story about a couple longing to have a child... and so forth and so on, during the story she can have a question and answer about if the parent needs to tell the child that she is adopted or not... then from there she will know the answer.

Well, i think the earlier the better for your sister to tell the child that she is adopted. Kids are smart than we take them for nowadays. I'm sure the she will understand. She may be hurt a little but when she realizes that her adoptive parents loved her very much, everything will be ok.

there's no right age for that..but if you're sister felt that her adopted daughter is matured enough to handle such situations then she can tell the situation..it is always better that it comes from her than anybody else..but your sister should be ready for the consequences..her adopted daughter might start looking for his/her real parents..

As soon as possible. You don't want to tell them too late, then they'll wonder what else you are hiding from them, and they won't trust you. The only risk is that she'll be curious about her parents, but that's only normal. When I learned about my mom I was curious to meet her. Its just about knowing where you came from so there's not an empty space in your life.

Wow! I think she should already know. It should have been something she "grew up" knowing. I was adopted when I was four but I just always knew it because it was discussed in front of me. Probably the younger the better really. If they wait until her teen years it will more than likely anger her and those years are already tough enough trying to figure out who you are. If they wait until she is much older there's the chance she'll find out herself and become very angry. That's normal because she's basically been lied to all her life by then! I'd say go ahead on those "where do babies come from?" talks and explain that she didn't come from mommies belly but that mommy and daddy actually got to pick her out because they wanted her and loved her!

Well, ur sister should tell at this age. otherwise when ur neice comes to know of her true identity herself, she will feel very bad. Usually the orphanage where ur sister adopted helps in telling the truth. these volunteers come home and explain everything to the kid. My cousin too has an adopted daughter. They took assitance of the orphange people. My neice is very normal and accepted that she is an adopted kid. she loves my sister more than anyone else. she never questioned about her biological parents. They are a very happy family. There are many cases where the family welcomes a biological child after the adopted one. These are normal now a days. There are number of social workers and volunteers who would come to your rescue.

My mother is an adopted child and she was told that she is adopted when she was eleven years old, the time when she was able to understand between blood relationship and adoption and foster parents too, however nowadays I would consider telling my child when he/she would be around eight to nine because they are smarter now.

My cousin had same situation like your sister. Her adopter daughter is now 10 years old,and since the child is 7 years old,she started to tell her about her true identity. My cousin first tell her daughter what is an adopted child,and why parents give their children for adoption. And,she explain everything why some parents give their kids for adoption,and she asks her daughter if she is happy with her life. Then,slowly she tells her daughter that,she is an adopted. And when the little kid ask my cousin why her parents give her for adoption,my cousin asked her daughter about her explanation why parents give their kids for adoption. Of course,there was confusion on the young kid's mind. But,slowly the little girl is happy that,even if she is only an adopted child,she was loved and cared by my cousin as their very own. Now,the next step is,when she turns 12,my cousin told her,that,she'll going to meet her real parents. Actually,the young kid doesn't want to meet her parents,she say's she's afraid that,they might took her from my cousin. My cousin again explain to her that,they can't take her from them,becoz,she is legally adopted,she show'd the young kid her birth certificate and tell her what is all about. But,still the kid is not prepare to meet her real parents. So,my cousin keep telling her the good sides of knowing the little kid her biological parents and her roots. The good side for telling the truth is,we never knew if we can keep the adoption issue forever. So,it is better that,we tell the adopted kid about the situation,before other people will let her know. The kid will understand,just a matter of explanation and perseverance to make the kid understand. I hope your sister will find the courage to tell her daughter about the truth. Have a good day always and good luck to your sister

For me I think now if you noticed that she can accept her situation and be humble to say so that the result is she can understand.

What is the purpose of telling her? Her adopted parents are her REAL parents, since the biological parents could not or would not raise her. She is so lucky she found a family that would love her and give her a good life.

my psychology teacher told us that she adopted a child and since he was 2 years old she teld him that he is not his real mother that she adopted him and grow up like that knowing that thei are not his real parents and he is very happy whit them and never tought to search for his real parents becouse he dosent whant to know them the real parent for him is the once ho adopted him and hi will be forever gratefull with them for adopting him :), your sites should have goten an adive frome a specialist frome the begining to avoid major conflicts . Good luck to your sister

Hi jessicaryan, I want to know if there are other people know this girl is adopted. If the answer is "yes", I think your sister's family should move to another new place to live. This girl is too young to accept this news. Even she maybe leave from home. Every child can't grow healthily without mother's love. In our country, the adopted parents tell their adopted children when they are going to pass away. Hope my reply can help you. Best wishes.

The right time is when the child is at the right age mature enough to understand the situation...For her age at 8 maybe it's still too early to inform her, and might cause some insecurities as compared to other kids out there

I am planning to adopt a child but i was having a debate with my man whether she should know she was adpoted and he says yes but i was suggesting at the time she gets married. but from this discussion i think she should know at an early stage so that she grows up knowing. Thanks hey

I think she should tell her as soon as she can. I know it's difficult to give a good opinion on something that you haven't experienced yourself, and I haven't adopted a child before, but I am a mum, and I think that it's important to always try to be open and honest with your child. You want them to be able to trust you, and also not be afraid to ask questions about things growing up. It's also important that they're not scared or confused about who they are, where they came from and how the world works. My daughter started asking questions about where babies came from when she was three, and this would have been the ideal time for your sister to start introducing the idea that babies grow in their mummies tummies, but sometimes when ladies can't grow a baby in their tummy they get to choose a baby instead. And that she's extra special because out of all the babies there were, her mummy chose her! She can have a discussion like this any time of course, because the 'where do babies come from' talk is usually a series of talks that lasts for years! You ask about risks, but I'd say that there are more risks to not telling her than telling her. Best to be honest.

I think the right time to tell the child that he or she was adopted is when she is still young but has the capability to understand the situation before he or she heard from other people.

adopted child is really difficult situation...if we told the child that she was adopted that kid probably couldn't understand the situation is....better the kid know about her background when her mind ready to take the action...8 years old is not the best time to tell her everything...just take your time slowly told her about her background little by little...maybe she can understand...if she want to know who her family is...just let her be but not letting her go that easily...dont force her too much...