Do you know of anyone who has autism?

@rosekiss (30414)
Eugene, Oregon
July 4, 2010 12:23pm CST
Hi Mylotters: This question has come to mind since my daughter just found out recently that my 4 yr old grandson has autism. He is her youngest child of 3, and it is upsetting to her since her other 2 boys don't have it. She is not sure how to deal with it, and I certainly don't know what to tell her. He was diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome. She is going to send him to head start in the fall, so hopefully, they will be able to help him with the issues he has by having autism. I do feel for her, as he is the very first grandchild of all I have to have it, and now that she is 18 weeks pregnant with her 4th, she is hoping that the baby doesn't have it. I think right now she is scared and I am scared for her. She is 35, and at high risk, so anything but nomal really worries me. I know maybe I shouldn't be worried, but I am, and I guess it is a mother's right to worry. Anyway, my grandson hates change and there are days that he will just scram and say things he wouldn't normally say. He will make her get out of his room as he doesn't want to talk to her, and it really upsets her when he does that. I just hope that anything that anyone can do for him to hlop me with his autism, will sure make me and my daughter feel better. Share your experiences with all of us, as I am puzzled as to what to tell her to do, and how to handle him when he acts out and gets angry. Take care all, and have a very good day.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
4 Jul 10
One of my customers child is Autistic. I know they have a lot of problems with her, but I'm not familiar with how they deal with it. Doctor's will tell you that it is only possible to have one Autistic child in a family, but that just isn't true. I was watching a show on the TV yesterday where a woman has 6 children & 5 of them are Autistic. Of course, that is a RARE case. It is very possible that your daughter's unborn child will NOT be autistic. She should be thankful that the other 2 children aren't. Your daughter needs to join a support group for parents with Autistic children & learn more about the disease & how to cope with it. It is my understanding that it affects every child a little differently, but similar in some ways. Instead of freaking out, you & your daughter need to learn more of what to expect & be as prepared as possible. Some Autistic children learn to play a musical instrument & find it is the only thing that calms & focuses them. One little girl had to listen to Billy Ray Cyrus' Achy Breaky Heart in order to calm & focus her.Out of the 5 children yesterday, ALL had a different way of coping. One was playing the guitar, one was drawing on the wall, one was rocking ALL the time, one was seeing pictures of Penguins, the last one couldn't speak at all & she had taught him sign language.. The MAIN thing that I see as a layperson is that ALL the children just needed to be LOVED first & foremost!!! Through love, parents can deal with anything!!!! The Mother yesterday said she was asked why she kept having children after seeing that she had a problem. She replied Which one should I get rid of??? She loved each of her children EQUALLY. Her only guilt was for the pressure put on on the only non-Autistic child who had to help take care of the other 5 thereby robbing her of her own childhood. The child that drew on the walls problem was solved by painting 3 walls in her room red & leaving ONLY ONE wall white. She was told she could draw in the white spaces & a couple of whiteboards were put on the red walls. She seemed to understand & only drew on the white areas.
@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
4 Jul 10
I will have to tell my daughter what you just told me. She is willing to do anything that she can to help minimize what he is going through, with the understanding that he will never be normal again. I think though, that right now, she is dealing with his autism better than I am, but that is only because she is around him everyday. He has good days and bad days, and so she never knows when he will act out again. At least now she knows why, so now she is more patient with him, than she would be if she didn't know he had autism. I am glad though that possibly the baby won't have it. It will be a girl and it will be devastating if she were to have it too. It is the girl she has always wanted. At least right now, the other 2 boys will be a big help to her, before the middle one goes back to his dad. Then she will sitll have the oldest one that can help, and I am sure he will. Thank you for responding and happy mylotting.
1 person likes this
@LadyMarissa (12148)
• United States
4 Jul 10
I don't have any children of my own, but good number of members here have Autistic children. There is an Autism category if you're interested... http://www.mylot.com/w/lists/9_10602/default.aspx Maybe you can join it & read some of the previous discussions or posts some of your questions there . Or even get notifications when a new discussion is started. That could possibly be your own little support group!!! My prayers are with you & your daughter!!!!
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@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
4 Jul 10
Thank you for the info on the autism forum. I might just check it out eventually. Like I had told one user, that he has his good days, and his bad days, and she never knows when he will act up.
@de_toya (2429)
• Indonesia
5 Jul 10
I am sorry about your grandson. Now days autism case is increasing. I never found kid with autism in my place. Autism is caused by contaminated food contain Pb when the mother was pregnant. Our world is now contaminated by many pollutant. There is therapist for autism kid while gradually pollutant are removed by medicine therapist. This cleansing process need much time. It is not easy but still possible. Use herbal medicine for remedy the kid autism.
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@Foxxee (3651)
• United States
9 Jul 10
I can tell you that contaminated food does not cause Autism. There is more to the story. A lot of people feel vaccines play a part, but there are also other cases where they even think it could be a DNA pass down. Everyone has a theory & everyone has a story. What's important is to learn about Autism the best you can. Trying to find a cure or guessing what caused Autism isn't the answer. You need to get involved & learn what you need to know to help the child cope. Yes... some say certain diets help, but it doesn't work for everyone. The best thing is therapy & having a really hands on teacher.
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@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
5 Jul 10
I never knew what caused autism. All I knos is, he has his good days and bad cays. That days that are bad, she is almost ready to pull her hair out, for sure. It gets bad, when he tells her he doesn't want to talk to her and to get out of his room. I think she feels that has failed as a parent in some way. I hope that things get better for him, and I realize that he could be much worse than he is, but still not having had it to deal with before is very hard. Thank you for taking the time to respond, and happy mylotting.
@de_toya (2429)
• Indonesia
12 Jul 10
Foxxee is right. It's not important to talk or discuss causes of autism. It's better how to remedy the autism from your grandson. He really need therapy soon. So, start the therapy as soon as possible.
@koalatbs (2229)
• United States
4 Jul 10
So sorry to hear about that rosekiss. I don't really know someone personally but a classmate of my son's at high school has a brother with it. I see him occasionally at school events.
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@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
4 Jul 10
What is the hardest for my daughter to deal with is the fact he is so young and when he acts out she just doesn't know what to do for him. It really is frustrating, that is for sure. Since she lives in another state, all I can do is pray for her to have the strength to cope with his condition. I really don't know what to tell her, since her nor her brother have autos,. so this all new for all of us, but I amsure we will get through it with God;s help. Thank you for responding and happy mylotting.
@bhanusb (5709)
• India
4 Jul 10
Hi rosekiss, there are many institutions who take care autistic children. They treat them and make them almost normal. Your daughter can admit her autistic boy in such an institution. I think your daughter should stop to carry another baby. She is only 35 years old and have four children(including the baby to come). This is enough. To nurse four children is a tough task. Now she should look after herself.
@Foxxee (3651)
• United States
9 Jul 10
Institution? Now that is really easy for someone who doesn't have children to say... Why would anyone want to put a child in a institution? This mother has 2 legs & 2 arms & should have no problem helping her son with his Autism. I'm sorry, but Autism doesn't mean you have to put the child away. That is sad & wrong. You do realize that would cause more harm? Besides, Head Start, the one I know about, is not a institution, it's a program that the child will go to for so many hours a day & have therapy. But I don't know what Head Start in your area does, but if it's like a institution, well I would rethink that... thats what they did in the 70's-80's when our children were a little off we were adviced to lock them up. Plus rosekiss said he was diagnosed with Aspergers, thats really not that bad. People with Aspergers can grow & learn & even have their own family. My son was diagnosed with Classic Autism & I still didn't give up. I worked with him everyday & got him the help he needed. I would never think of putting him in a institution & anyone that would suggest that to me & were in reaching arms, would probably get hit.
@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
4 Jul 10
She is planning on having her tubes tied a few weeks after she gives birth, as she feels it is enough too. The oldest boy is 15, and the other one is 12. She is putting him into headstart and I guess they will be able to work with him. Where there is a will there is a way I always say. Believe me, she wishes she weren't having another one, but she doesn't believe in abortion and this is her husbands 2nd child as the 2 older boys have a different father, she never married. Anyway, having an autistic child is new for the whole family. Thank you for responding and happy mylotting.
• China
18 Mar 11
No i don't know anyone who has Autism. Autism affects information processing in the brain.These problem sign usually can see before 3 years of child. I do pray that he will be fine soon friend. Good day!
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@rosekiss (30414)
• Eugene, Oregon
18 Mar 11
You are lucky that you don't. I am just hoping that his baby brother doesn't have it. One will never know until he gets a certain age. the 4 year old doesn't act like a normal 4 year old, as he has issues that need to be dealt with, and my daughter is hoping that he will overcome them, but from what I understand, he probably won't. It is so hard for her to have to deal with him not knowing how to handle his situation, and being able to stay sane at the same time. I do feel for her though, and I do hope that something can and will be done to help them both. Thank you for responding and have a great day.