Have you ever felt like you have spoken too soon?

haha =D 5 months is not too short a time. To me, spoken too soon means having to retract my words really soon, barely it's being digested and yet i have to take it back.. lol =D It seems like your brother is quite strict to the children huh?? BUt after all, they are not his own children, and maybe his punishments are too harsh for the kids, thus his gf refuses to do it?

i firmly believe in jinxing things,if it's said outloud then it's been jinxed,this is a tough situation,as your brother has been living at home for so long he was probably finding it hard to cope without his mum,it's not right i know but think of it like a prisoner being in prison for years and years and then being let out,they find it really hard to adjust to the real world

The best thing my dad ever did for me was tell me I could no longer move in with him. I was 24 and had bounced back and forth for years--when I couldn't afford to live on my own, I moved in with him. He forced me to take responsibility for my actions and the next time I was broke I took a second job and starting cleaning up my finances--made a budget and stuck to it, stopped buying wants and confined myself to needs, etc. I'm 56 now and at least once a year I thank him for doing that for me. It hurt him to do so but it was so worth it to us both! Maybe your parents need to do the same thing. And if they say what if he lives on the street, big deal. I've done that and believe me, it's a powerful motivator!

yeah i think i get that feeling, having spoken too soon , and if only i waited a little longer i would've said something which sounds better or something which i won't regret later.... or something more credible, exact, precise, or simply more accurate... well sorry i've never read about your earlier post(s) about your brother.... good luck to you and your brother's family....

Hello jugsjugs, Yes, i have spoken way too soon and the ending of the conversation was not ending in my head or thoughts. Sometimes people talk too slow for me or the story is too long and they do not get to the point for me. I seem jump people like this. i know it is annoying and rude even. I am trying to do better and let them finish. Some got sorta cranky or they say Let Me Finsih etc... yes, i have done this quite a few times. Thanks and have a great day! Sincerley Unique16

Leaving home at 41 sounds pretty late in the day. I would somehow imagine that he'll be stuck there now. He clearly is not up to living on the 'outside'.

I have found that I do that a lot. I say something and then it turns out the person proves me wrong. I know there was an instance where I was sticking up for my child when my husband decided he didn't want to let him do something because he was afraid he would get into trouble. Well the very next time we let him go out he did do something to get into trouble. It wasn't anything major and he didn't break the law or go to jail but it was enough to make you say "I told you so".

I feel that way a lot. I guess I have got to learn to keep my mouth shut. It is a hard habit to break, however. This is really going to take a great deal of practice to get use to.

yep i have put my foot in my mouth several times saying something too soon.. or even worse.. knowing something would happen and saying it would and no one believing you then it happens and if its a bad thing i almost feel guilty and some people get mad at you for predicting it like you made it happen!!

It's never wise to make a judgemental statement about another's life. It's sure to get you in trouble. All of us have ups and downs but this doesn't make us good or bad people, it's just life.

Sometimes...I remember once telling my husband how lucky I was not to break a precious china teapot I had for years just as he lifted his arm and knocked it off the cabinet and onto the floor! These things happen I guess but in regards to your brother, maybe it is up to your parents to ask him to leave and be responsible for his own life.

At 41 he should have moved out and stayed out and had a lasting relationship long before now. There is always and argument and kids are not going to mind. He's not a realistic person and if he starts drinking and what woman would want him?

I have had this happen to me too. I say something and then a few days or weeks later, it is not true. Sometimes I hate to say anything for fear that it will "jimx" it. If your brother waited so long to move out he is probably used to somebody doing things for him, and not being responsible. Moving in with someone that has kids would be hard to get used to. It also doesn't help that his ex is always contacting him. I hope he doesn't start drinking again. If he does, your parents should tell him to move out. Maybe they should anyway and force him to grow up!

Yes, that's often the case for me. I'm someone who likes to get my voice heard and i'm someone impatient. I don't like to wait for results. When i see things going my way, i tend to be overjoy, and those joy proved to be short lived. Though i'm proven wrong, but that's just my own opinion and i don't care much. In the case of your brother, he needs some peace and thus he's home right now?

Yes, I have done this a lot. Just when I feel or thought like someone was going to change, and I am so sure that the worst is over, I am wrong. One time I said, "Now that my brother is in college, he will get his act together." Oh yeah, I spoke too soon. He was gambling in the dorms, partying, and he wasn't taking of his Type 1 Diabetes. He wasn't taking care of himself, he was getting into trouble.

Yes. I thought I wouldn't see a older co worker again but she is coming back. No biggie but I had Just thought about how everything was smooth since she was gone But I think at least hope everything will be ok.

Oh Jugs, at age 41 this is almost too predictable. I can't really imagine living with the parents at that age but I do know people that do. They protect their comfort zone. It's pretty sad because their will come a time when mom and dad are not there for them or mom and dad will grow to need him more than he needs them. Anyone that is living with mom and dad still at age 41...well...you know.

Why doesn't he try getting a place of his own without any women?

That's what I would do if I had to move back home with my folks

Speaking to soon is but common to many. Your brother needs moral and emotional support to get over this problem. His confidence is a bit low and he needs to understand and find himself. I hope he'll not resort to drinking. Advice him without condemning him. Talk to him as if you are talking to a child. His ego is already down and hurting. Goodluck.