i still love him

I have been in that situation before and I could only tell you this "you both will know the right time". Don't rush, just do something else. Regardless how much you miss the person, you know that you're both not ready yet, it'll end up ugly in the end. Be patient with yourself. Don't rush to change, instead do things that you normally did before your relationship. It will help. It doesn't mean that you don't love him, it simply means that you can live without him. It's better to have a relationship with someone who isn't overly clingy. It's healthier for the both of you. This time, wait for him to contact you. When he does, do not rush in and act as if everything is the way it used to be. It may be that you feel a great love for him but you need to know as well that he's ready to change his ways as well. Being mad to the point of no longer talking to you when he feels like it is an immature way of saying 'I will only love you if you do what I want'. That isn't something you would want to build a future with. Love yourself more. Do things to help you cope. It doesn't mean your relationship is over, just don't focus too much on something you don't have full control of. I assure you, things would be better when you start doing things that doesn't concern him.

Hi monmon20, after reading your post, I started going back to my past. My boyfriend and I became a couple seven years ago. I was so immature that time that I would make an issue about a small thing or even something that happened in the past. He always says that I am talking as if that thing happened just now. Meaning, I always bring back something that is already past. For the past seven years, couldn't really count how much pain I gave to him, from simple things like going to his office uninvited and appearing in the supermarket without telling him that I will come. Before, I thought that he doesn't want to see me because he always got mad after seeing me instead of being happy which I expect him to be. But after 7 yrs of being together, I could really tell that he cares and really loves me. I now understand him. Last year, we have had out biggest fight ever. And it is all because of me. I started being close to another guy and he could feel it. He knew it from the very beginning but he said nothing. But later on, when I got mad at him for being so insensitive and accused him that he doesn't care about our relationship, then he told me that he knew that I am having an affair with another guy. Then he started talking. He told me everything I've done for the past years which I realized are inappropriate and could ruin our relationship. I realized that I am so wrong. All the while, he was suffering because of my immaturity. He made me choose between him and the other guy. On the spot, I told him that it was only him that I love. After that incident, he did not speak to me for almost a week. And that's the time I realized how much he mean to me. I thought I already lose him. I was so scared but I did not call him or talk to him. I gave him time to forgive me. After two weeks, he sent me a message saying he woke up that morning and forget everything that had happened. I was so thankful for the second chance. I started to be more careful of what I say and do. I became more appreciative of him. I discovered so many things not only about him but more so about myself. I can't help laughing remembering the things I have done in the past - from arguing him if he missed sending me message in the morning up to pushing him to bring me with him and marry me. I really could not really imagine what would happened if we really got married seven years ago. I could not even handle my own emotions that time, how could I probably face being a mother and a wife.

Hi, Be strong and always look forward to your future. Do you think it is worthy for you to love this man? Is he the right person that you are looking for as your partner in life? I can sense from what you mentioned above that this man may not be serious in your relationship. He can't just ask you to change yourself,whereby he never try to understand you more. You guys are supposed to spend time together,then will get to know each other better,instead of having a cold war. You should ask him what changes that he wanted from you. and what mistake you have done,so that he can ask you to change. It happened to me when I was dating with my boyfriend. We do have argument on and off and sometimes, I even can't stand of his stubborn character. But when I think back, for a relationship to stay forever, we have to see the situation and need mutual respect, give and take is one of the way to establish stable relationship. I tried to change myself,not to be that stubborn and try to understand him better. Now, we are married and sometimes, I still can feel his stubborn character is still there,it is hard for him to change it.But I never force my husband to change his character,but I need him to understand me more and put himself in my shoes before he said out some words who may hurt my feeling. For your case, it is best to have a chat with that man and get it settle as soon as possible. There is no point to drag it for long which may not have the ending. I do believe there are many nice guys out there who is worthy for your love and cares. Hope my idea can give you a solution to your problem.

Hmm.. what an interesting story you have monmon. But quite complicated. Honestly I can't really tell who has the right side of the story because you haven't mentioned which "change" does he want you to do.. Well if that "change" is for the better of you then why not give in to his request? If it's something negative about you then prove him you can change it for the sake of your relationship. But still, I know a change in a person isn't done overnight.. I guess you could refer to it as prevention so as to avoid him getting mad at you again.. I think he still loves you. well that's how I see it.. If it happens that he wanted you to change but you couldn't understand which part of you that he wants to be changed then try to talk with him about it. That would help the both of you to understand everything.. Take it easy monmon.. Good Luck and I hope everything would be fine soon..

what have you did? (something to change)... I'm a boy so I know what guys want to say when acting that way,... Maybe if there's a matter with yourself that he has seen then you know ...LOVE IS WORTH SACRIFICE" If you honestly love him ...then you know what ? ..If you call him up..He'll be expecting that you have change ...and to bring back those happy days of the two of you...must have to take effort the two of you... everythings gonna work out alright ...He will forgive you on whatever it is...and it happens ,,,you'll end up with the thought ..." YEAH..HE LOVES ME TOO.."

you don't have to change for him to love you the way you want it to be loved...why he keeps on telling you to change first....if he truly loves you then he must accept whatever you are.... if that guy really loves you then even you have the ugliest characteristics ever, he will still love you of who you are...

You know our heart does not stop loving this is the big problem. If we love someone we feel the love until we are not giving up. If you still love him I cannot blame you because that is the heart that dictates us we will make a patience until we are tired and who knows that one day we woke up in different moods saying that "i am free" means you feel that you did not loving him anymore. And that is the good for you now. I can say this because even I have been there and always fall in that situation every now and then. How nice to be inlove but really hurt to be broken heart.

Let's see, he breaks up with you and changes his phone number without giving you the new one, but calls right away when HE needs something. When you said "I love you", he said "I love you more" while he's still in the process of getting you to give him whatever he needs to succeed. Then the first thing you do, he gets mad and leaves saying he wants YOU to change so he can love you. Dear one, you have a grade A jerk dangling a line at you whenever he is in need, but who doesn't give a rat's fanny about what you might need. Forget the louse, give him a great rating to a potential employer and then tell the nice employer to be, "Did I get it right? I'm his girlfriend, you know, and I think that's all he told me to tell you." Let's see how ticked he gets then! He ain't worth the time and effort. Any 'love' you give him will end up with you being verbally, psychologically, or physically abused at every turn. Turn your back and don't think twice about moving on with your life.

After reading this discussion that I can say that you loved him truly. And still loves him. I think there are very fewer persons who always love their someone special even they know the other persons are not like him/her. So I think the situation is also this type with you. I think you may continue to still love him and one day comes then your boyfriends also realize that only you made for him.

You really loved him. But as others advised you don't be in a hurry. take time to enjoy. Maybe you will think that you can't enjoy because he is not with you. No that is not true. just open your eyes and learn to appreciate all the good things around you. It isn't easy to just forget the one you truly love but you have to at least give love to yourself too.

Hi Monmon, I know the feeling and how hard it is trying to get over of someone who just left us especially for someone else. I dunno what advise to give, I can only share, because my break up was for forever, and that will be no coming back anymore. Maybe now you should stand up and forget it for a while. Look ahead and you will realise that the journey is still far. If he was really meant for you, then he won't wait too long till he wants to contact you again like the first time he did. And if you were meant for him, I'm sure he will sees that someday, no one can tells when..just let the nature takes its place.

mon :) you should send him a message saying i love you^^ if you love me too answer to it^^ and wait his answer^^ if he doesnt answer is bcs he really doesnt love you. its the only way for you to know or to forget him or to be with him. he said for you to call when you changed right? so send him a message and wait for his answer. if he answers it you should call him and speak to each other^^ if he doesnt answer is bcs he doesnt love you. is only way for you to find out^^ just try this now and tell me how things went^^ im here to help you^^

I could say that you are truly in love with him. Forgetting the person you've love is a very difficult to make. If you really want to forget him, I think you better concentrate your self to work. And then think that he is not just the man your going to meet in life there are still many. But if you could not do that then may be just accept the consequence, because when we are in love we are willing to be hurt.

talking about love which happens to anyone, there is no end as i read your article, i found the same condition between you and me the different is, i have been single for almost 11 months. My ex would have a new boyfriend rather than waiting or being alone. i know you miss him a lot, that hurt your heart and kills you slowly but that is something that you have go through! you must be strong and face it! i know you can do it .. i pray for you! be better and strong!