Looking for a way out of an argument

Hello neiyarg, It is a tough situation for a mother to witness her daughter to become a mother at a wrong time. Though your a mother now but still you are your mother's daughter. Nothing has change. Eventually, obliviously you two can get along together in time and parenting is not a one night sleep obligation. Just remember a mother is always a mother. I could sense she knew you more than enough.

My daughter and I are going through this, and while I don't want to get into what is causing it, it is causing me a great deal of grief. She is doing great with her son, with whom is younger and she is with his father, her little girl, not so much :(

Hmmm! That would be a tough one especially when the argument is between a mother and a daughter. I am not a mother yet, so I cannot fully describe what you feel when your mom don't see you as a mother material or devoted mother. Arguing with your mother about "parenting" issues would be a never ending one. Hence, you cannot lengthen the argument because it would sound disrespect to her. I cannot really think of a way how to end an argument with your mom when the issue is your being a mother. It will appear as if she is always seeing your flaws. Mothers are like that. I think, the only way is just listen and do not argue. She will stop when you tend to keep quiet. Of course it would be irritating because our mothers tend to be so talkative when they scold us. Just show her that you have your ways to take care of your kids. Show her that you can make it and apply what you have learned from her. To stop an argument is never argue.

This has happened to some of my friends...and my mother and I even went through some problems for a while. It's an adjustment for a mother...to see her daughter as a mother herself and harder if there are conflicting parenting ideas. Whether your mother agrees with the way that you are raising your child or not, as long as you are doing what is best for your child, you're doing fine so don't let her views drive a wedge between the two of you. Go back to being mother and daughter. Let her advise you...and then you decide for yourself.

Hi! I'm not a mom yet, but I think that you should try looking at it through your mom's perspective. She loves you, and probably still thinks you're her baby so it's kinda hard for her to accept that you're gonna be a mom too. Try to talk to her to see if there's anyway you could patch things up and make your relationship better. Best of luck to all of you!

I am still not a mother but I know this kind of situation. My friends keep on sharing their experiences with their in-laws or their parents during and after pregnancy. I guess they really want to help. Parents think you need to learn more about parenting that's why they like to help so that you can't do mistakes that they already knew might happen. But in your part, you want to learn firsthand of being a parent too. That's what creates the conflict between you/everyone else with their mothers/fathers.' I hope you and your mom are OK. Tell her that you have your instincts and it's your baby. The baby should bond with you. It's your decision. So that your mom wont be offended, ask her questions if she's in the mood. In that way, you can share ideas and fix some conflicting decisions.