Advice from someone other than parents....
By ParaTed2k
@ParaTed2k (22940)
Sheboygan, Wisconsin
November 15, 2010 8:14pm CST
Sunday, one of the teenagers at church came to me for advice on something. It wasn't the first time (for her, or most of the youth there), and the problem wasn't earth shattering, but I have to admit, it felt pretty good.
When this happens, it reminds me of the adults who helped me out when I was growing up. None of them took the place of my own parents (who were great!), but there are just times a teenager wants advice or guidance from someone else.
There are times the problem is big enough that I include the parents, but usually it isn't. When it has been, I have either advised the kid to bring it to their parents, or talked to them myself (with the knowledge of the kid).
What do you think about teens seeking guidance and advice from other adults? Would you ever establish that kind of relationship with someone else's children?
2 people like this
9 responses
@asyria51 (2861)
• United States
16 Nov 10
I am the go to person for my cousin's children, just like my cousins were my go to people when I was a teenager.
my cousins are all older than me, most about 10 years older. When I was a teenager, they were clearly adults, someone I could go to, but they were young enough to still remember what it was like.
I made a pact with my cousins, that I would call if i was in trouble, or drunk and could not drive, and they would get someone to pick me up and drop me off somewhere. I have made the same pact with their children. If they call, there are no reprecussions short of a discussion about it. No getting grounded, no getting the phone taken away.
1 person likes this
@shia88 (4571)
• Malaysia
16 Nov 10
Hi,
SOmetimes, it is more convenience to talk about our
problem with friends rather than with our parents.
Because friends are almost the same aged with us and their
thinking may be different with what our parents due to age and
experiences.
So not all the time, I will refer to my parents for advice.
It is solely depend on what situation,then only I will look
for the best person to give me an advice.
@ganeshprabhuk (1722)
• India
16 Nov 10
Yes we can establish a kind of relationship with someone else's children also. When a child is going in a wrong route, we can show right path. That would be greatly help and the kid will stop doing. Child may not accept but still will make an effort to understand. Thats great right. We can always establish a relation. We are all human beings.
@camposkat (306)
•
16 Nov 10
I have been involved in the youth group of the church where I go to in my home country and I must admit I did experience these things. We had what we call a bible study group that meets once every week and apart from studying and reading the bible, we also pray for each other and give each other advice if needed. Some of these teens have very small problems, some have really big ones that even I haven't encountered. I try to give them the best guidance and advice I could think of and just encourage them to pray about it as I pray for them too. :) If given the chance to do it again, I would love to do it especially to have another youth group to get involved in. They look up to you like an older sister or just a friend that they can talk to and it is great, I guess it motivates you to be more attentive and be a good listener.
@RoyWebb (28)
•
16 Nov 10
This is very difficult in this day and age, a member of my family was accused of abuse and it was a terrible time for the family, so when dealing with young children you must always be careful not to put yourself in a position where these type of accusation can be made. Thankfully all was well in the end. My own children have always known and been comfortable to talk to their parents about anything and I think that this is the way to be,
@ElicBxn (63594)
• United States
16 Nov 10
No, I'm not the kind of gal kids confide in.
Honestly, the only time I ever found myself in the position to do so I actually could make an explanation and recommendation that helped.
Unfortunately, I had also kind of caused the problem in the first place tho I had been told my name would stay out of it.
@JudgeIronFist (2472)
• Singapore
16 Nov 10
Sometimes kids get sick of their parents' naggings and just want to have a silent moment and then get advice from other people. To them, other peoples' advice seemed working out for this kids and they do better and can even communicate better with their parents.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
16 Nov 10
It is okay for my kids to asks and seek advice from other adult people aside from me.
It is a normal process of developing youths that they want to hear other people's opinion,not only from their friends and relatives,but with other people really.
It's like out of curiosity or just need to know other's opinion for comparison.
My kids are young teeners and i am their friend not just a mother.
So,i am sure that my kids listens to me,thu they asks advice from others too.
Like how other youngsters asked advice from me,and i always told them to listen to their parents before making their decision.
Have a good day always
