To get married with a foreigner means....

@pinetree (218)
China
December 15, 2010 7:49am CST
as for me ,to get married with a foreigner means culture shock, means sometimes it's hard for your kids to get used of the main culture of the mother or father, they might be the third culture kids... I just imagine it's tired to communicate with non-native speakers...no matter how deep you understand the other's culture , there is still gap..
11 responses
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
To get married with a foreigner means... JUST THE SAME THING! they are humans and they eat the same thing and need the same thing like I do. Culture shock is just a way of adjusting but this will not be the biggest shock of your life not unless you totally don't know the person before you marry him/her. In every relationship there will always be adjustments, not just culture and beliefs. But you may get used to it as time passes by and as you develop your relationship to deeper and both of you become more mature. Love needs to be nurture in every relationship, no matter what the nationality may be. I don't see any difference marrying my husband who is a foreigner. But I see people of the same nationality still having the same problems and this has nothing to do on marrying a race who is different from yours. I take it as an advantage that we spoke different language, because if I get angry I can say it on own language he would not understand and later on we will laugh about it. Your kids will just adopt what both of you speak. But this depends on the way you bring your child. So I don't see any gap with our relationship as what you said that "there is still gap???". I speak this because I for one am married to the person I love who is a foreigner and I don't see anything difference that will make it a problem with regards to keeping our relationship and our marriage solid.
15 Dec 10
You are right and me and my foriegn husband are exactly the same!
• United States
16 Dec 10
me too..
@pinetree (218)
• China
16 Dec 10
thanks , this is really a good answer to my question, and in every relationship is like this, and we will finally find out a harmonious way to solve the problems. Have a marvelous day , and a wonderful family!
@CJscott (4187)
• Portage La Prairie, Manitoba
15 Dec 10
I think my dear beautiful friend you are most correct. It is always a shock and a trial in understanding each other when we are from different countries, especially when we speak a different language. However, sometimes the challenges are well worth the company. Also, for the kids, just move to a country, where you are both foreigners and neither of you speaks the native tongue, just to keep things even and interesting. Sincerely and With Appreciation.
@pinetree (218)
• China
17 Dec 10
Hello, Dear Scott, thanks for your sincere reply yes, the challenges are well worth the company, but sometimes I just think of if it's so hard, so tired I'd rather get married with a man from my motherland.then we will have less trouble, and live a peaceful life... But I also know true love has many ways, if two people really love each other,If it is really from God, they can pass all the challenges,even though all of them may feel hard and tired, God will give them joy from what they've experienced... warmly. with best regards, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
@madteaparty (2748)
• Japan
16 Dec 10
Well, when you marry with someone usually is because you have a deep bond with that person, and in order to accomplish that you need to be able to communicate. Also, if you marry with a person who comes from a country in which the national language is the same as yours, there's no language problem at all. If both are from different native laguages, there's something called "learning a foreign language", and it's not that difficult Of course there's a cultural gap, but I think that the differences between people make the relationship more interesting
@sanjay91422 (2725)
• India
16 Dec 10
I like to communicate with others even if they use different verbal language. I am not married yet and have no plans that whether I will marry a native or a foreigner. I still single and I don't have problem if we like each other. I think all the cultural and language problems will stay only for a short span. They will not be there after some time, that is what I think.
@camposkat (306)
15 Dec 10
To get married to a foreigner means being able to break down barriers in almost a lot of areas such as communication, financial, cultural and others. It isn't as bad as you think. I have met a lot of people, Asians mostly, who have been married to foreigners and most of them have a stable married relationship. Yes there are some challenges especially when it comes to cultural backgrounds but if you can both cope with it, understand each other and try to balance things, then it will work out no matter what. Take me and my fiance for example. I am from the Philippines, my fiance is British. Yes, I speak English fluently but he himself is trying to learn my culture especially my language. It's not a problem if both parties will cooperate to make the relationship work. It's only when either one would be selfish enough to say "I want to have it my own way" will it be a really awful relationship, then there will be problems.
@visavis (5934)
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
I agree with you that "FEW" are stable and lucky I can tell but more are struggling and sufferring because wrong decision. Anyway we cannot force them to stop because they have freedom and feelings of their own... see you around
• Philippines
16 Dec 10
Communication is really a big factor in marriage.Even how much two people love each other, you will still find couples fighting over their differences.How much more if they cannot understand each other because of language barrier. I have a friend who marry a foreigner.She shared to me one instance when she and her husband had a fight. Her husband was very angry her husband was talking fast but when she uttered in her own language the she doesn't understand what he is saying(which the husband understood), both of them kept quite. Her husband calm down and hugged her. That moment turned into a sweet one but this not happens to all couple all the time plus another factor is the culture of both parties.
@ShepherdSpy (8544)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
15 Dec 10
If there is a Language barrier,there are bound to be some comunication issues...It also means there are now issues of naturalisation and immigration to contend with as a result of where the couple are planning on Living following the wedding ceremony..
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
Yes Exactly when you had an affair with the foreigner automatic the difference between you will surely rise. First the adjustment to their culture, language, customary way of living and many more. Only the love to each other will hold the relationship. There is one thing i would like to share having n affair with the foreign man. Mostly they are caring and loving and they show their respect to a woman they love but once they hate you and said she don't like you... that is true. This is according to what i observe to them.
@angelsmummy (1696)
15 Dec 10
I am married to a foriegner but that doesnt mean we love each other any less! Marriage is about the important things like LOVE. My children are lucky enough to speak 2 languages because of our decision, it doesnt matter in the slightest if you are married to someone who is foriegn or who is native.
@visavis (5934)
• Philippines
15 Dec 10
Marrying a foreigner is a choice but you must prepare what are the side effect to you and your future including your family. I don't know others woman/man how they handle such case, is it loved is blind or security or true love... the best is to marry same culture.... see you around
@ivancdp (73)
• Brazil
15 Dec 10
I see no barrier for this problem. I'd marry a foreign woman without a doubt if I really loved her. Besides, try to look on the bright side: you can teach 2 languages to your kids while they're growing up, haha.