When is the right time for a woman to move out of her parent's house?

Hahaha... It is somehow right. He really wants me to get married. However, it seems not the direction for me. I have no luck in that department. Anyway, he said sorry already and that he said those things because he's not feeling well. But this gets me to thinking and planning for my future. I really ought to grow and learn to be independent. Because there will come a time that I have to be stronger. Thanks for your input. See you around mylot.

Oh,another wonder here.... i got bunch of female friends who are still single. the youngest is 26 and the rest on their late 30's now. not to mention that they are pretty and sexy huh. what's happening with you girls?...are you too choosy? or...guys are too shy and intimidated..since you're professionals (ugh ugh)

LOL! Actually, both may apply. I am too choosy and I think they get intimidated as well (which I think works for me... if not for all, the majority. Hehehe). But I guess it's just not the right time.

Hi maximax8. Thanks for your suggestions and it does help me with my plans and decisions. I tried to assess myself if I am actually ready to move out. Financially, I believe I can do so. It would be easy to rent a room or a unit. But then I think it would be better if I buy a house so that it can be a more stable move for me. I would just need to save for the down payment and from there I can just get a loan. Thanks again and happy mylotting.

Hi. Thanks for commenting. Actually, I'm old enough to leave my parent's abode. I have a job a regular job that pays well. I even helped my siblings finished their studies. It's just that I feel obligated to help in the family. But right now, since both of my siblings have finished their studies, I believe I can already leave home. Happy mylotting.

Good plan.

If I stay on the same street, it would be too near for my mother and I'm sure she will visit my house often and wash all my dirty clothes and clean my room. I intend to use my transpo expense daily and convert it to rental expense. So my plan is to find a place near work. That way, my mother will be discourage to visit me daily. I'll just visit her maybe twice a week. But before I do that, I have to save first. Thanks.

Thanks for your input suggar. It is very exact with my situation. My father is getting old and he has lots of concerns and issues. I just hope that he'll be able to overcome this phase in his life. I still intend to find my own place. I believe I would really feel good when I get to stand on my own two feet. Happy mylotting.

I'm happy for you and for your boyfriend. People are like that... they don't see the value of the people around them when they are still around. But when they don't see friends and family members anymore, they began to realize that they had taken their love ones for granted. I hope I would not commit the same mistake. I intend to give just some space to breath between my father and I but I also intend not to break our relationship. Thanks again for your sharing.

Hello again hun, i can say that for men it's really hard when they can't do their normal life as it was before. You know, there are that kind of men who are extra responsible and were very active in their life and when some health problems knock on their own door, it's making them nerve and pissed off of everything. I got the right example, who is the father of my boyfriend. He was businessman before and he has so active and nice life, doing money, walking our with friends, he was a hunter with so many hobbies. Last years he received one illness and now he can't move one of his hands and one of his legs. He is not paralyzed, but he is not like before. His social life ended, most of his friends went away and don't look for him anymore, he just can't live so active and he can't earn money, so he is closed in his little box at home, lost hope that he will live as it was before, he just gave up. And i can see him, he is so nerve at himself, but because he got nothing to do about it, all the time my boyfriend and his mother are victim of his murmur. Most of the time he is not pleased by anything, everything is done wrong about him. It was that way before we move - we lived with my boyfriend's parents around half an year. And now when we moved, he loves us more than everything. He understood how much we care about him and that we are worried, so now my boyfriend and his father got great talks and good relations.

Thanks EdnaReyes. I intend to do that and I am now planning either to rent, or buy a unit/house. However, I would need time to save for down payment. With my father saying sorry, that gives me enough time to do these. I would just have to be more patient and understanding towards my parents. They are not getting any younger. But still, I have to find my own place and create a home for my own. We usually clash because of our different values. My father would need his space and I think it would be hard for him to accept my belief. Thanks for sharing. And see you around mylot.

Thanks andy77e. I have thought about it. Perhaps when I've saved enough to pay for the two months rental deposit and 1 month advance. Getting married may not be the right solution. That entails more responsibility compared to being independent. Also, if one gets married, he/she should live on their own and not with parents... yes I agree with that. But as for my case, it is not a likely option. Anyway, thanks. Happy mylotting.

Hahaha. That is very true for me. I remember when I was still working in Dunkin Doughnuts (food chain) for part-time, while finishing my studies, my parents agreed that I can work provided that they will pick me up from work. I told them that I would feel ashamed if they do that. We met half-way and they get to meet me at the corners of the street near our house. But they visited me at stores when they got a chance (which was sooo frequent). I remembered too that my father used to tell me that he worry for me because I am too spirited and adventurous for a girl. He said it was okay if I was a boy or I'm ugly. But it happens that I have (not to boast) likable appearance.

Thanks jennbart. Honestly, I seldom gets to see my father because I spend long hours at work. I see him during the evening, when I am all exhausted already. I usually watch tv or just lay down while waiting for dinner when I arrive home to get a few hours rest. However, my father thinks that I am just bumming around. Hopefully that changed after our discussion. I told him that I want peace and quiet after work and I don't need all the bickering. I told my mother that I usually have to settle problems at work, counseling my co-employees and resolving of other people's issues in life. It seems that my mother relayed this to my father. And now, he is extra careful. Right now, my father behaves well. I just hope that he will always have a good mood. My mother derives her happiness from us, her children. She got used to my father's moods already but I know that she will be very lonely when we leave home. I would aspire to find a place for my own but I guess I would have more time to prepare for it. I would also need to find a place near home and work so that it will not be very difficult for me to visit my family. I've grown to love my niece so much and I will surely be unhappy if I don't get to see her. Right now, my niece and my mom are the big factors that keeps me from staying at home.

Thanks rainbowink. :) It's nice to know that we share the same experience. I hope this discussion helps you. Our fellow mylotters gave good opinions that would help us in our decisions. Next to that is to pray that we make the right decision and that God helps us to face this new adventure in our life. Happy mylotting.

Hi mingviva03. Thanks for your suggestion. It is motivating and inspiring. Hearing or learning experience of others gives me more conviction that I may be making the right decision.

You are correct pipayful. I've stayed so long with my family that I forgot already my dream when I was still a teenager. I used to dream of being independent. But now, I've made my family so dependent of me and I in turn became too attached. I would just have to start saving and start learning new habits like washing my clothes, going out for groceries, and everything that has something to do with taking care of myself. Thanks for your input.

Hi klarian. I think, financially, I just have to settle a few bills. Mentally and spiritually, I believe I am ready as well. With physically, I think I need to wait until I get clearance for my injured foot. But all in all, I am almost ready. I can rent a house with my current income but I need a friend to stay with me. Also, I've been thinking, if I rent room or a house, it would be temporary. I am now thinking of saving for a property. Wish me luck!

Thanks for the vote of confidence klarian. I hope that it is indeed a wise decision for me that I won't regret someday. For the meantime, I'll take it easy with my parents since they are both getting old. I will leave them softly so that they will understand the reason for my leaving. That it is not because that I don't love them but because I need to learn how to take care of myself so that I can take care of others (specially them).

It's a different way around. I give money to my mother every pay day... I pay the bills for the telephone and cable tv... and I helped my brother finish his studies. I lend money most of the time to my mother when needed and I buy my mother things that she needs when able to. The very reason of my dad's insecurities are because of the fact that I am totally independent with my decisions and he can't take that. He has no work and he feels that the only authority that he has was the fact that we are living under his roof. Don't get me wrong. I don't lose respect towards my dad. In fact, I love him and I want to help him. He may just need space and chance to feel that he's in-charge. By moving out of our house, it would give him chance to feel free. Thanks for your comment. See you around.

Hi shaggin. When I was younger, I really wanted to move out. But since our culture was a close-knit family, it was not feasible during that time. I admire you for having the strength to move out at such a young age. Now, I somehow felt that I became emotionally dependent towards my mother. Anyway,this is somehow a good opportunity for me to grow. Happy mylotting.

Amen. Totally agree!!!

You have a good point. As I said to the other respondents, it was a reversed situation. Actually, I am more of the bread winner in the family. My father may be losing his securities now that we, his children decide for ourselves. He wanted us to just follow what he would say but that cannot be the case since we are all old enough. My father said sorry to me this morning. According to him, he did not intended to say those words and that he was just not feeling well. I forgive him but I still would want to transfer. I will now start saving for my future. I will not just leave them immediately. I would just have to take a step at a time. Happy mylotting.

Same here. Actually, I have my own small room. I now have so many things that won't fit in my room. I really want to have my own space or house to groom and design. I don't have this opportunity at home because my mother does the cleaning and decision for the furniture arrangements. If I'm able to buy my own house, then that would give me chance to design the way I want my home to be.