my 3 year old daughter talks back at me!

I have a three year old and a total of five children. I make sure that my child knows that what we a speaking about or what I am telling her is serious and she has to rememeber to show the proper respect. Children at that age learn through repetition. Now, you will hav eto start off at zero, so first sit her down and talk to her this is the teaching phase. Do this for about three days, consistantly, everytime she talks back, calmly and lovingly remind her of what you two spoke about. Then tell her that she continues to be disrespectful she will recieve a displine. It can be whatever you choose, shildren that age normally have a favorite something. My daughter simply loves Dora, so a displine for her is she isn't able to watch Dora. It straightens her right up and teaches her to put importance on what her mother is teaching her. I am not too sure I would reward her right now for not being disrespectful, you don't want to teach her that she should get rewarded for not doing right. First establish the base and then if you want to reward her for her progress after a while go for it! Well, I hope this helps and good luck!

Have you tried rewarding her and praising her when she doesn't talk back? If my kids get lippy I ignore them. I only respond or give them what they want if they talk to me in a nice way. They know that they will get nothing special if they don't act right. Of course that hasn't stopped them for talking back and mouthing off at each other lol. But at least they do okay with me (knock on wood).

Start by learning how and where she learned to speak to you that way. Do others speak like that? Keep her away from them. Does she hear it on TV? Turn the stupid thing off. You have to find the source of a problem before you can be sucessful at solving it. IF she sees others being this way...of course..human nature and her ever learning mind will learn what it is taught/sees. TV today for kids is pathetic. I'd start there!

Hi desertsong, 3 year olds are inclined to mimic the behavior that they are exposed to. Perhaps she is acting as she had seen someone else act. Perhaps you could pay attention to the behavior that she sees in other people and correct that person if possible.

What I would do is to try to use positive reinforcement when she doesn't backtalk. On the other hand, when she is talking to you in a way that is really not appropriate, I would try to ignore her because sometimes children just want attention and negative attention works as well for them as positive attention. If the child is receiving any kind of attention at all it can work as reinforcement. This is a stage and it will pass.

Reverse the process, try to talk to her as calmly as you can. And have a heart to heart talk w/ her. Tell her not to hesitate and tell you everything that she has to say. Then ensure her that you understand the point, but talking back to you is not right. Healthy conversation w/ kids will help them grow into beautiful individuals. Good luck :)

Hi desertsong, I know what are you going throu! Well, you have to be firm. You have to punish her priving her from a candy, a cartoon show, a walk in the park, a toy. Something that she likes. So each time she talks back to you, you have to private her of it. When she is calm, you can price her back. Blessings! ... Dainy

Everybody has given you some good advice here. The important thing is that you have to be consistent. If you don't she will go right back to what she was doing and it will be harder the next time around as she will have the idea that you are not serious so she can get away with the behaviour. Scolding doesn't work as you are doing to her what she was doing to you. Always remember they learn by example, so if you scold her that means that she can scold you too. So it follows that the punishment can only be something that mummy can do and she can't do to mummy. Depriving her of something she loves to do as the other moms said.

A three year old? That surprised me a bit. I'm not really sure how you could control her behavior but I don't think scolding her would help. You might create a rift between the two of you. Why not try a different approach by talking to her calmly but but firm enough to let her know you're serious? Try to resist flaring up. Maybe a calm approach would rub off on her and she might eventually respond also in a calm manner.

I am not sure you can control her at that age. My daughter can be very stubborn. But she does not like to be punished. Whenever she does something naughty, I told her that if she does not act like a good girl, she will need to be punished. That usually stops her whining and small stuff like that. She does need to take time out sometimes, like when she push her little sister. She kicks and screams when she is punished. It breaks my heart, but I cannot let her continue to misbehave.

As a mom of three girls, I can tell you that scolding doesn't work. It just seems to make them understand that if they do it, then they get more attention. For my girls, when they talked back to me, I would simply tell them that it was rude for them to do it and put them in time-out. We also had a reward system where they had a certain amount of time that they got a day for TV and such. And everytime, they would misbehave, then I would take time away from it. So, while their sisters are enjoying watching their favorite show, the misbehaved child is sitting in their room. But my children started talking back around 5-6 yrs old because they learned it in daycare. It all stopped within a month or so. But as a 3 year old, they are "testing the waters" to see what they can and cannot get away with. So, I would just explain to her why it is wrong and why we shouldn't talk back.