The nerve of him using my email address!
@shaggin (72288)
United States
March 14, 2011 8:28am CST
Oh boy here I go again. Back about 8 months ago my ex got a new car after he totaled his other one drunk driving. He had to get car insurance on the new vehicle. If he gave them an email address he would save 10% on the cost. Thats awesome but the problem was he used my email address and that was not cool with me. I told him I wasent happy about it but I let it slide.
Yesterday he called me and asked if I got an email from xbox live. I told him no and that he is not to be using my email. He called me today and said that they would just send me an email that I had to confirm so he could get a free game download. I told him I would not confirm it that I would only delete the email if it came. I told him that if he needs an email address he can go down to the library and go to yahoo or hotmail and set up his own free email address. I cant believe he thinks that giving out my email address to save himself money is something I would be ok with. I have enough spam emails without having emails for him coming to my house when he hasent lived here in 13 months and I've always paid for my internet.
Has anything like this ever happened to you? How did it make you feel? If you were in my shoes would you just allow him to use your email address?
1 person likes this
15 responses
@dismalgrin (2604)
• United States
14 Mar 11
Oh my word! That is horrible! My ex still has mail sent to my house and I don't get how this mail is still coming. We were never actually married and I've moved about 5 times since he left me. Every time I fill out a card at the post office I say 'just move single person' so that I don't get his mail, but I still get it. It's stupid too because I'm getting all his child support statements in the mail and I think he needs that to stay out of trouble with the law. Thankfully he doesn't ask me for any sort of favors anymore. I would probably smack him across the face for that one. Lol. Maybe you should consider changing your email address. I know it's a pain in the butt, but if he doesn't know it... he can't really use it.
1 person likes this
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
14 Mar 11
Well he has a Verizon phone and I only have a prepaid tracfone so when he sends a text to my phone I go to my computer if I am home and send him an email from my computer to his phone and then it doesnt cost me anything. Hes just so nervy the things he thinks is acceptable. I get his mail sometimes to from the post office. When he moved out he got his own p.o. box and did the change of address thing but once in awhile I still get his mail. I dont check my mail all the time so if there was something important in there for him he wouldnt get it right away. The child support papers that are coming to you are important I dont know why they send them to you and not him. Why dont you call up his case worker and tell him you keep getting your mail and are tired of it. Your ex should call them himself actually and say this is my address the mail you are sending needs to come here and not keep going to my exes house.
@dismalgrin (2604)
• United States
14 Mar 11
The weird thing is that I do call the case worker... and they are very aware that he doesn't live with me. But they just keep coming anyhow. The paranoid side of me says this is his way of making sure I know he will never really let me go... but the annoyed side of me says that the post office is just way too stupid to get it right around here.
1 person likes this
@dismalgrin (2604)
• United States
14 Mar 11
Oh and does your area have Cricket phones? I have one and it is a life saver! My particular phone is an android and it's prepaid for 55 dollars a month I get ALL smartphone features. But they also have cheaper phones and plans. I know a lot of people that buy the 35 dollar a month plan that is just unlimited talk and text. (Oh yes, mine is unlimited too) It's a really great deal if you have one in your area and it doesn't require a credit check. And if you can't pay one money it doesn't go on your credit score, they don't hound you to make your payment. It's just shut off and you go in and pay again and the same phone with the same number comes back on.
1 person likes this
@moondancer (7431)
• United States
14 Mar 11
NO! NO way, an email is a person thing it's like going into your person drawer with your undies in it. Well to me it is. You know what I mean. He needs to get his own. Everyone in our family has their own.
Even my grandchildren my little grandchildren I have made them an email account on yahoo. If they use the computer even a little bit they have an email. Even if they just play games they have an email account so they can learn to use an email account. I told them to just go into it at least once every 2 or 3 months to keep it active. I make sure it's gone into of course since they are young but they have their own.
Adults are older and they are responsible enough that they can make their own accounts.
1 person likes this
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
14 Mar 11
He called me again and told me that when he called Xbox they said they had sent me three different emails and I havent gotten any of them. A lot of times my emails do not come through and it really makes me angry. I told him I dont care anyway that I dont want the emails coming to my machine and if they do come here I wont tell him what they say they will automatically get deleted. I told him to go to the library and set up the free account then call Xbox and have the email changed. He isnt able to log into my email to see the emails hes just giving out my email address when he wants to ugh.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160996)
• United States
14 Mar 11
Even little kids can do that. He needs to grow up and get it taken care of. Your e mail may be filtering some of the stuff to spam folder anyway.
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
15 Mar 11
I actually dont have a spam folder so it annoys me when I am supposed to get messages and they dont come through. My internet provider blocks out things that they think could be spam and a lot of times its not spam stuff at all so I want all of my emails to come through spam or not drives me nuts becuase I miss out on some important stuff sometimes.
@tarachand (3895)
• India
15 Mar 11
Well, tell him that you have relied to the mail saying that you re not interested in the offer and ask him politely to stop sing your email address for his work or to face the consequences. Also, I am sure that by now you must have changed the password so that he can't access you mails.
If it doesn't work, take legal action against him for attempting identity theft and for so many other things that a lawyer will make stick against him, including harassment. And sue him for damages and charges too. Also, inform your service provider about his actions so that you don't have to face the consequences that arise out of his misuse of your email id.
@tarachand (3895)
• India
15 Mar 11
Incidentally, creating an email account is no big deal and is free with most email service providers. My children - 3 of them, and my wife all have their own email accounts, as does my father - many of them each as a matter of fact, and even if by chance they forget to sign off, I do it for them without even checking to see if everything they do online is kosher or not, and though they know my passwords, they never ever log on to any of my email accounts- we all value privacy - even that of a sub teenager too much to transgress it-just speaking about internet etiquette, no offense or showing off intended.
All the best!
1 person likes this
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
16 Mar 11
Well I dont think I would want to go that far about it by sueing him or anything like that. If I just delete the emails he wont get them or hear about them anyway so giving out my email address wont be working out in his favor anyway. He actually asked me to not delete them and just tell him what they said. Like its my responsilibity or something ugh.
@GardenGerty (160996)
• United States
14 Mar 11
No, I would not let him use my e mail account. I would be afraid of some of the stuff he would send for. You do not even want it to look like you are getting some of the stuff he might send for, based on some of the stuff you have said.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160996)
• United States
15 Mar 11
Definitely a reason for him not to drive the kids around.
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
15 Mar 11
HAHA very true. The first time he used it after we split was to give it to the car insurance place. I kept getting his emails and told him when his bill was due. When I renewed my car insurance policy I got a notice to my email thanking me for being a continued member so when he told me he had to spend a certain amount of money each month on his car insurance I told him he was lying because if he paid the bill I would have gotten a notice to my email. He never paid for car insurance so he drives around illegally not a good idea at all.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
20 Mar 11
First off, I don't get it. Why can't he just have his own email address? It's easy enough to set it up, why can't he do it?
Emails are really a personal thing. That's why we go to great lenghts to make it unique, and private. If he wants to conduct his business that requires email addresses, he should do it with his own. No sense in dragging you in whatever mess that he is in.
1 person likes this
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
21 Mar 11
My thoughts exactly. Its pure lazyness that he doesnt go to the library and set up his own email creating a free one with hotmail or yahoo or something. Instead its easier just to give out my email because he thought incorrectly that I would just help him out. Hes just so nervy.
@toniganzon (72532)
• Philippines
15 Mar 11
Wow that ex-boyfriend of yours really is an ahole i think. Pardon me for that word, but then i cannot help but say it here. Our email address is a part of our personal identity. Nobody is allowed to use if but the person who created it. Using somebody else's email is like stealing that person's identity.
My husband never use my email without my permission and so far i couldn't remember him asking if he can use it for personal use. Sometimes he would just ask his mom to send something to my email for convenience but he would never use my email at all.
What's the use of password anyway when another person can use our email. The password signifies that our email is only for us. If i were you i would cancel my email but it would be too much of a hassle if all your transactions and bills are sent to that mail.
You were right in not opening his message and telling him you're gonna delete it.
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
15 Mar 11
All my online earnings sites are through that email. There is so much that goes to that email to change it would be horrible. I text his cell phone from my email because it doesnt cost me any money to do it that way. So what he needs to do is just not use my email address at all its not his its wrong for him to use it!
@la_chique (1498)
•
14 Mar 11
Just keep telling him no, and delete whatever e-mails you havn't authorised yourself. When he's not getting his stuff he'll stop it. Everytime I read another of your discussions, I understand more and more why he's your Ex!
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
15 Mar 11
I felt lately that I havent had to much to say about him people on mylot must get so sick of hearing the things about what a loser my ex is. Maybe they like having something to relate to though since I know I'm not the only one who goes through this stuff. But this ticked me off knowing he was still trying to use my email address.
@shattered (1728)
• Philippines
15 Mar 11
That's terrible. I keep my email secure and keep spam of it by not signing up on sites using my personal email. I have a separate account for signup emails. It's difficult enough keeping my emails spam free, what with someone else using it would really be terrible.
There's a bunch of free email online why can;t he get one for himself right? I think you are doing the right thing by deleting emails that are not from you or report the abuse to the one sending you the email.
I understand your frustration.
There's a bunch of free email online why can;t he get one for himself right? I think you are doing the right thing by deleting emails that are not from you or report the abuse to the one sending you the email.
I understand your frustration.1 person likes this
@jennyze (7028)
• Indonesia
15 Mar 11
Well, I never experienced this as I would made an account for him in the first place, cause I don't feel secure in giving others access to use my personal email as reference. There are many people who would take advantage of others like a sponge, so better be careful in future.
If he will not set up his own email, I guess you need to close yours and set up a new one to prevent him from using it for bigger cause.
1 person likes this
@goldenkagi (137)
• Philippines
15 Mar 11
If you can, I suggest you delete that email account and open up a new one. And don't talk to that ex of yours again seeing as he's only using you to make his life easier at your own expense. Good luck!
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
16 Mar 11
Haha that would be awesome if I never had to talk to him again but its not possible. We have two kids together. Legally we are still married but havent been together in 13 months and never will be again. I cant afford to pay for a divorce and since it was me who wanted the divorce he refuses to pay for it. He told my kids the other day he had a present for them but then he forgot it at his house so he told them he would bring it tonight after he was done working. Well it was almost bedtime and we hadent heard from him so I sent him a text message saying "the kids want 2 know if ur going 2 b here like u promised?" So then he calls the house and says he totally forgot about it. To make matters worse he was in the middle of getting a tattoo like thats more important then remembering to bring the kids the presents he told them he would bring.
@Zer0Stats (1147)
• India
14 Mar 11
Of course,not!I'll never ever share my e-mail address with anyone,not even with my own shadow.Not only about my e-mail,I just don't like sharing things.
Anyways,what does he have problem to set up his own e-mail address?
Hmmmmm,I think he is trying to save his time and money.He might be doing that because you're always on-line so he doesn't have to be and check e-mails all the time but it's not right.I think he is taking your words so lightly....
1 person likes this
@kwylima (451)
• United States
14 Mar 11
What? It is so stupid! OMG...delete it ...and that is it.You really dont have to give him any information or confirm anything. You did good telling him that you will not do anything to him about it.
sometimes people don't like to take care for they on life and still waiting that somebody else is gonna do that for them. Those kind of people can be 67 years old and never gonna learn anything in the life!
be far from this kind of people.
@shaggin (72288)
• United States
15 Mar 11
He will never grow up he cant do anything by himself. He doesnt even wash his clothes he either buys new ones or just keeps wearing them over and over again spraying them with cologne or febreeze its disgusting. The things that he chooses not to do are so simple that its like seriously when are you going to grow up and just act like a normal adult.
@gorgeousmae (42)
• Philippines
15 Mar 11
If I will be in your shoes , I would do the same thing . I would not let my boyfriend abuse me ,it is so unfair . It would be better if he asks your permission before doing so . I bet you need to do him a little spanking.
