Is it ok for a woman to be friends with her Ex.

Oh ! When I first read the title of your discussion, I was like, "Ofcourse its ok to be freinds with your ex".. But after I read the whole thingf, you say he is abusive... I myself think your friend should maintain her distance from her abusive ex. Only because he was abusive. I don't see any other reason for anyone to be away from their ex just because they broke off or something.. What say ?

That is just wrong what your friend is doing to herself and her new relationship. She in living in denial; she seems to be hoping that the old relationship will resurrect itself into a better one. How can she be willing to continue to have anything to do with a guy who abused her? Women can sometime put the wrong label on abuse. But, "he loves me." wrong! he abused you and you are willing to forgive, that's okay, but you don't have to have anything to do with him. This is actually sending the abuser a wrong message, that the next girlfriend will tolerate the same behavior from him, so he doesn't have to change his behavior, ever. If I were her new boyfriend, I would become her ex, in a heartbeat.

it's ok to be friends with an ex, long as you dont let it get in the way of any other relationships you have. but why would you let your ex take you to work? has he got some kind of hold over her even thou they are not together. but if i was the new b.f. i wouldnt be standing for it, he's an ex for a reason. my ex was abusive and i finally walked away last year, he is not even adult enough to talk to me about our son. ive tried cummincation but his dad says he's the go between.

Why not? There's nothing wrong about it. It's not as if you've haven't shared your time with each other. But that also depends if your current boyfriend is somewhat insecure and immature. They usually think negative and this might cause you some troubles or fights.But for me..that shouldn't be an issue.

I don't see any problem with remaining friendly with an ex. But in the case of your friend, it can be quite confusing. Perhaps your friend enjoys the abuse. In that case, she is right where she wants to be. Or perhaps the abusive ex is manipulating her into getting back together. Bottom line. Many people are drawn to abuse because of their psychological experiences. Many victims of abuse relate abuse to love. I would say, look at the end result and one gets an idea of what motivates individuals. In this case, she continues to pursue and abusive person and will most likely end up being abused. Your friend has issues in my opinion.

I think it is ok to be on good terms with an ex. But in this case since he was abusive it sounds like a bad idea. Maybe she still has feelings for him. Sounds crazy to still have feelings for someone like that but some people do. I agree the new boyfriend should leave her. Having your ex (abusive or not) picking you up and taking you to work everyday is wrong when you have someone new.

I'm still good friends with my ex-husband and we've been divorced for 26 years, but he never was abusive - we parted on good terms and for various non-hostile reasons. I'd guess your friend has a problem with self-esteem in that she seems attracted to the abusive side of what she had with that boyfriend. Assuming the boyfriend she now has treats her well, I'm wondering if she's still linking up with her ex because he excites her in some way? If she is the type who's drawn to abusive relationships, then there must be an underlying reason for it which I'd recommend she seek help for, such as counselling/therapy, as in future if she and her current boyfriend were to part, not dealing with the problem could steer her towards dysfunctional relationships that would be very damaging - maybe also towards any children she may have in the future.

i was going to say the same, im friends with most of my ex's but i was never abusied either so ni would kick him to the curb and move along