Husbands always take the favour of Mother

Hello Ms. Rathi, Sorry, I am not in agreement. I have seen many mothers stating that their son is always taking favor of his wife. I have heard from many mothers saying that their son's wife has done some magic on him. He is not listening to the mother and doing whatever his wife is telling him to do. I think this is the most seen case. Nowadays, husbands are taking favor of their wives and not of their mother. I am married, and like every household there are often small conflicts between my wife and my mother. I have adopted the golden rule -- never interfere unless they start fighting, which has never happened till date. Another point I am following is -- whenever I am talking to my wife about my mother, I always pay good respect to my mother so that my wife will also give respect to her. If I am not giving respect to my mother, how can my wife will give respect to my mother. She will do as I do. She will follow my path always and develops attitude after seeing my attitude towards my family. If I am respecting my family, she will respect. If I am not respecting my family, she will never respect. So, my golden rules are: 1. Do not interfere. 2. Give respect to your family (mother in this case) so that your wife will do the same.

Hi dear, Read full, what I have written here… In fact it is a talent and a technique that each and every housewives should learn and understand. For each h/b if his mother is alongwith him, both mother and wife has equal importance. Just think of a 3-5 years of a child, how important is a mother? A child require the support of mother and children always deserve it. Similarly, a man, who is in whatever age, his mother is always his mother and he should treat her as mother. For him, in the earlier years, she have given love and protection, care and attention. All these things we all know better. If he is a good son, this REAL FACT would be always lay behind in his mind and heart for ever. As being a wife, you should realize this fact and give freedom and importance to his mother also. If she realize that you also loving her, his mother’s view on you will get changed. Try to love her and when he also realize that you love his mother, his attitude towards you also will get changed slowly. You should have a mind to accept her minor mistakes and treat her as your own mother, though for many people it is hard to accept. Also, don’t consider his mother as a separate person and treat her also as an important person in your family and give her respects, which will force her to love you also. Even now also you can do it and she will identify your change and in a later stage, she will definitely love you. Also, if there is a special affection between mother and son, it is their privilege and you need to understand the fact. You also have as much freedom and love to you husband and whenever you both are together, speak about his mother good qualities and which will make him proud of you and his mother also. When you appreciate her good things and correct nicely with her faults, they will recognize you as a good daughter-in-law. Also, understand that they all are old aged and they will thing little conservative. I think you are from North India and our cultural faiths and traditional beliefs are all related to older styles and life patterns. So, understand all such things and be cooperative with others also. You will find good. We cannot blame anyone who loves their mother. Even I am married and I love my children, wife and mother also. All has their own relevance and positions in our life and if we give their respect in their positions, we will get the love from all and we should realize who they are, so you can love everyone equally. Have a nice day, Thank-s

Dear friend, In a family if anyone is better mediator it could be the mother, husband or wife. The problems could be solved by that mediator. May be mother loves his son, a son love his mother, a wife love her husband - all are interrelated and it is values in relationship. A wife today could become a mother tomorrow, a husband today could become a father of his daughter. I feel some of thing are liberal and flexible. Sometimes some anticipations or prediction may not occurred as desired. We have got a husband at least who do not beat or drink and also a wife at least who is loving her husband. Still I feel human wants goes on.

In my opinion, that is the fault of the son/husband. If he is acting as the mediator, he should not take sides. He should listened to both sides and tell whoever is at fault where the fault lies. Just blindly taking the side of the mother is not the right way to go. If my husband takes his mother's side without hearing my side of the story (If we ever get into that kind of situation), I would definitely make him hear my side of the story. If I am at fault, I will apologize to him and to my mother-in-law. I would not want my husband to blindly take my side either.

Thank God i was never in that situation. I have a good relationship with my mother-in-law and never did we fight or argue about anything. My in laws never meddled with our affairs and i'm very lucky to have independence from them. I don't know what i would do if i were in that situation, i would never try to argue with my in laws and i would never let my husband choose. It's really difficult to say when i am not in that situation. My mother never got along with my grandma but she was a very good daughter in law. The only reason why my grandma hated her was because of my mom's parents. My mom, never tried to argue with her in laws and in fact she became a slave until she and my father decided to move out and have their own house.

Hi Surekhaji, I am not married yet but I can guess the situation of husband as mediator between mother and wife.If I have to face such a situation in future,I will favour the right side.Fortunately I have very nice mother and I don't think she will create unnecessary problems with my wife in future.Sometime I am really worried about the nature of my future life partner.Does she will manage with my family? I don't know what will happen in future but right now I am enjoying my batchlor life. Happy mylotting.

A husband should be able to act wisely. Impartial anyone. A husband should ask his mother and his wife, a problem that makes his wife and mother arguing. Who is wrong, given the right to counsel, and tried to not make a wrong does not feel cornered.

hello dear, The son/husband should not interfere with the issue between mother and wife. He has to set aside his feeling between this two woman in his life. What he needs to do is talk with them separately and clear the issue without giving any final words (not blaming either one). Happy weekdays

hi, It happens in every house ., in my home me and father stays., My father does the same he goes on side of his sister or else some one else .It is not in only married life it is in every where.A man or a women dont wish to have any bad response or impression on him or her by judging one is right and one to be wrong.He or she wants life to be calm going.So after a particular time the quarrel will finish it by itself., Some way or the other some will say sorry and other forgives.It s life.Should not take anything that serious and make a small issue of the family to be a big one . Let it go , no one on the world is forever living , we live we should live happily together if not individually just respecting each others privacy.Adjust if not independently live.Living is important not quarelling amongst.

surekharathi, I am so lucky and blessed! Even though I am not married my boyfriend will not behave as a mediator. His mother and I get along beautifully but I can see if we were to have an issue he would be so objective with the both of us. Which for the sake of peace and harmony the way it should be. A husband/son should not have to take sides when his loved ones are at odds. He can objectively give advice to both as a whole but not take sides. Although his mother and wife both would be considered his priority he needs to remember that for the sake of harmony and love he cannot favor one over the other. His primary duty in my opinion is always for his own immediate family however the mother should not be ruled out as priority.

Yeah actually this is a tough situation. I think the husband should take side of who is right. Actually there is this funny saying here in my country "Never marry a mama's boy" lol. But actually that's just a joke or is it??? LOL

i guess the husband will choose her mom for a simple reason that her mom knows him well and mom always know the best for him, but in this kind of situation mom won't understand if the son will favored his wife, on the other hand the wife can understand why the husband chooses his mom, maybe when his mom left they could both talk about the situation, you know just to pleased his mom thing and work it out with his wife.

Maybe its a case-to-case basis or it depends on the relationship between mother, son & wife. Take my case for example, we live with my mother-in-law and we have no problems regarding who's in favor with whom. We respect each others' opinion and we get along just fine.

It's hard to get well with the mother-in-law.Most times,husbands always become sandwich biscuit.I think every husband's mother is not easy,they doesn't want their sons to worry about the relationship between daughter in laws and mother in laws.Respect the old,and make her laugh,happy as if as you can.Make her feel u love her son and contribute ur heart to this family.Ur mother in laws will also love u.Love the person u should love is the most important.

Hi surekha, I think the husband can take the part where justice belongs. He can easily make his wife/mother understand who did the mistake and how to compromise. Since he is close to both people it is very easy to handle. However, he deliberately takes the mother’s part then it creates troubles in the family. This is my views on your question. However, I wish to add that my mother in law is great and we never made any troubles to hubby/son. I think the credit goes to my mother in law, she is so great and well adjusting with all of her DILs and treating them as her own daughters. Naturally we also felt the same on her, like our own mother.

For me, as for many people around the world, Elizabeth Taylor, will always be "Cleopatra", she was a beautiful woman, that´s out of the question, but now, there are many beautiful women as well, but that´s not enough to become an Elizabeth Taylor, it was not only her beauty, but her energy, her personality, her attitude that made her unique.

I make it a point not to anger my mother-in-law because i know if i do, it will also anger my husband.