WHY are people ditching me?
By bonnie
@bunnybon7 (50973)
Holiday, Florida
May 9, 2011 2:06pm CST
i had one friend on here for a long time. she left once, then came back and sent me a friends request. i promptly accepted. I even had her email addy and we emailed back and forth a while. now i just get spam things from her once a month and when i tried to email her back to ask her why, it was blocked?
I saw her answer a discussion on here last week. asked her then why when i looked, id been taken off her friends here. then on FB, shes no longer a friend. Ive been wracking my brain as to why shes doing this but, she wont even tell me. Wouldnt you tell someone if something made you upset at them? Then just now, i looked for another friend that seems to still be here but is no longer my friend. even though i took her side in a dispute. Of course ive made a few new friends here that i have their email. or we are on FB together to. But for some crazy reason, it bothers me if someone dont like me for some unknown reason. Does that bother you? I just wish they'd tell me why instead of just going away. id except it. 
but id also like to be able to work on my bad people skills if i knew why. So, if you ditch me, will you at least let me know why? i wont stalk you, i promise. lol.7 people like this
24 responses
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
9 May 11
First of all bunnybon you and I are friends and I can not imagine that you have any bad people skills. Seriously you have been so sweet all the time and I have gone as far as asked you for contact information because not only I but many care a great deal about you here.
So leave it be at the fact that whomever the member is, perhaps has her own reasons but surely nothing you have done wrong. I can't see that having happened as not only do you comment back nicely on all your discussions, I have seen your caring ways in responses to others.
I would not ditch you, after you you have my telephone number. lol
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
9 May 11
Ha ha! I love it. yoyo knows exactly how to get a hold of me too. I do enjoy the many of us that look out for one another, when one senses something is wrong with one, someone will network and we find out what if anything is wrong.
Hi yoyo
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
9 May 11
HI BON, if u can figure out why people act the way they do let me know.They can just get their tail up in the air & u have no idea why. Don't worry about it. I'm sure u have done nothing, Bon.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
thanks friend. glad you are still with me. i dont even know if shes mad or just not getting any of my messages any where. but im sure im not going to concern myself any longer. i still have so many here. 
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (160483)
• United States
9 May 11
'If ever I would leave you... It wouldn't be in spring time, knowing you in spring I'm da da da dahhhh. Oh no not in spring time, summer, winter or fall' forgive my bad singing, but I do not foresee leaving our friendship. I have left one or two, when they just spam my pm. I have a couple of blocked family members, and they know why. On here, if I am deleting a friendship, I tell them exactly why. I am sorry that this is happening to you.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160483)
• United States
9 May 11
I thought that was sung by Richard Burton,in Camelot. 
Guess I will look it up on swag bucks.
Guess I will look it up on swag bucks.@GardenGerty (160483)
• United States
9 May 11
Richard Harris was Arthur, Franco Nero was the singer, as Lancelot. I missed it all the way around, and I did not earn swag either. Darn.
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
10 May 11
people do that for no reason online all the time,i'd try not to take it to heart too much.i've had people kick me off friends lists for the simple offense of "not being on every waking moment" like they are.
if she's blocked you but still sends you spam,she doesn't sound like much of a friend.
if she's blocked you but still sends you spam,she doesn't sound like much of a friend.1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 May 11
im still hoping her email was hacked. sorry, that sounds bad but to me its better to not think badly of her. she was always so nice. but im leaving after this last atempt . we will see. 
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
9 May 11
Don't let it bother you. Internet friendships, most of them, are temporary. Some people want to "friend" you to use you for spam and referrals while others just drift away. Don't let it bother you.
2 people like this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
you are right. but some just become more dear to me if they have tried to help me with things, like you for instance. if you were to drop me from emails, and places we are on together and be like that with no explaination, i would wonder. like at least you have ask me not to send you links and stuff so i try to remember that. at least you tell me what you dont like and i appreciate it. hugs.
hugs.1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
exactly. me to. here you dont even have to face the person
you can just say i dont like your attitude, beliefs, whatever and that i can understand and deal with. 
@Christmas2006 (1661)
• United States
9 May 11
Hi bunny
I so agree with you. I would want to know why some one was upset with me. Of course sometimes I think they are reasons that are beyond our controll. Not sure I can explain what I mean but the way we look at something may not be the way some one else looks at it and that's why they are upset. Kind of like is the cup 1/2 full or 1/2 empty. Anyway, I haven't ditched you. Just trying to do my assignments! Like the one I am doing now, I am having such a hard time with it and I have a zillion other things that are upsetting me on my mind so I can't even concentrate on the assignment! But I am still your friend even though I haven't been here much at all!
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
thank you honey. i know, cause you are still on my friends list. im not worried that ive done something wrong to someone when they are still on my list and havent dumped me. although i may worry if they are ok. i dont expect all my friends to answer all my discussions here either. i mean, i dont get around to all theirs. but if i had your email, and you emailed me with a link about once or twice a month, id want something from you saying why the spam, if you are taking me off all your sites as a friend and also, blocking replies to the email, when i have no other way of finding out whats the problem. hope you get caught up before long sweetie. its not you.1 person likes this
@buenavida (9984)
• Sweden
16 May 11
Hi, bunnybon I hope you can deal with this without taking it too hard, as we don´t always know what happens to people.
One of my friends got her email hacked and I got emails from someone that I thought was her. That person pretended to have been robbed of all money and was stuck in London and asked me to borrow her some money so that she could get home.
I thought it was true and sent her money, £70 - could not send more as I have a low income - Later I found out that the mails were not from her, so the money was gone.
Things like that can happen to email accounts so who knows if it is some virus or hacker and spammer who is active in your case too..
Other things can also happen, so many suffer of lack of right nutrition and can get depressions and even mental problems from that, so that they cannot communicate properly. Also, what they have been taught at home can affect grown ups during their lifetime..
Wish you a great day..
I hope you can deal with this without taking it too hard, as we don´t always know what happens to people.
One of my friends got her email hacked and I got emails from someone that I thought was her. That person pretended to have been robbed of all money and was stuck in London and asked me to borrow her some money so that she could get home.
I thought it was true and sent her money, £70 - could not send more as I have a low income - Later I found out that the mails were not from her, so the money was gone.
Things like that can happen to email accounts so who knows if it is some virus or hacker and spammer who is active in your case too..
Other things can also happen, so many suffer of lack of right nutrition and can get depressions and even mental problems from that, so that they cannot communicate properly. Also, what they have been taught at home can affect grown ups during their lifetime..
Wish you a great day..
@buenavida (9984)
• Sweden
17 May 11
Well that happened more than a year ago, it made me get rid of some unnecessary expenses I had on the Internet - so in a way I have earned it back. 
It also made me more cautious, so in the long run I can avoid this kind of confidence tricksters and hopefully won´t be scammed again.
It looks like there is something good in everything that happens to us.. I hope there will be someting good in your experience too..
Thanks for accepting me as your friend...
It also made me more cautious, so in the long run I can avoid this kind of confidence tricksters and hopefully won´t be scammed again.
It looks like there is something good in everything that happens to us.. I hope there will be someting good in your experience too..
Thanks for accepting me as your friend...1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
16 May 11
thanks. you are very right and ive concidered all those options. so sorry you lost so much money. thats a hard lesson. 
2 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
10 May 11
Oh sweetie!! I'm really sorry this happened to you! That is SO wrong! I promise to let you know if you upset me in any way shape or form. I doubt you will because you haven't in the past however, if you did, I would let you know. Some people like to use the internet as a way to hide so apparently that's what these people have done. I hate to say this but they weren't a friend to begin with or they'd be willing to talk it out in order to get things on the right track again. I've lost friends too, on here and in real life because they've done something to me that I just cannot tolerate but I let them know about it before I did away with the friendship.
Now you listen to me, ok? There's NOTHING wrong with you! NOTHING! Remember that!!
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
10 May 11
I don't know, maybe..... hard to say. How about answering one of her discussions with a note asking what happened? Maybe then you'll get something from her.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
thanks. you are so sweet. i appreciate people letting me know. maybe her email got hacked and she dont know. im just at a loss. but time will tell i guess. 1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
i guess i could check her profile again and see if shes doing any these days. i saw her answer on one a while back and asked her then but never got a response.
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
9 May 11
Maybe they don't deserve to have you as a friend? 
'Friend' is a big word which sadly has taken on a new meaning since internet arrived and 'friendship' where we could discuss everything and trust those with whom we shared our thoughts and problems is no longer how it was when I was younger.
If I have a friend and something happens that causes a rift between us then if they are really friends as I intend a friend to be, we would talk it over before any deletions took place. If this didn't happen then I would not ask myself too many questions but just get on without them
'Friend' is a big word which sadly has taken on a new meaning since internet arrived and 'friendship' where we could discuss everything and trust those with whom we shared our thoughts and problems is no longer how it was when I was younger.
If I have a friend and something happens that causes a rift between us then if they are really friends as I intend a friend to be, we would talk it over before any deletions took place. If this didn't happen then I would not ask myself too many questions but just get on without them 1 person likes this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
9 May 11
"Never a truer word"
I love that phrase you said to me a while ago and every chance I get I love to use it.
Hi mysd
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
9 May 11
maybe she will see this discussion and come to it. the thing is, she was always the one wanted my friendship. before. so, im just wondering why? thanks mysdian. i guess its her loss if she cant at least tell me whats up.
@yoyo1198 (3641)
• United States
9 May 11
She's probably feeling guilty about spamming you. I agree with mysD and HWG. Apparently she wasn't a 'friend' in the main sense of the word.
I wouldn't do that to you or anyone else I feel I have grown close to here on myLot. I guess friend means more to some of us than to others. I think you should just let it go, Bon.
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
yes im trying to. in fact i did join that place thats about went under from her. but i hope shes not upset about that. i dont blame her a bit. it was a good source for money for a while. you know that sideticks? guess i'll let it go till i can figure whats wrong.1 person likes this
@celticeagle (165922)
• Boise, Idaho
10 May 11
Weren't you gone for a while? Maybe these two members thought they had lost contact with you.
I am a very curious person and, yes, this would really bother me. I wonder pretty much the same things as you are.
BUt you never know. Maybe they are having some problems and just do not feel like explaining right now. And remember alot of times we automatically take it to be our fault instead of realizing that sometimes people just do this sort of thing for no aparent reason and leave caring people wondering WTF?!
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
you are so right. ive been kind of gone for a while. only responding to some of my friends discussions here and there. i try to get at least one of each friend in each day. hugs, bon1 person likes this
@jazel_juan (15746)
• Philippines
10 May 11
Honestly can't find reasons for her actions..maybe she is just too busy? or maybe she might not be a friend at all...or maybe her account got hacked and it was not her? so there are so many possibilities
1 person likes this
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
10 May 11
yes i kind of worried about that with the email. but here, shes being alussive also, so i just dont know what to think. guess i shouldnt take it personally. 
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
9 May 11
Maybe she is with a boyfriend that does not want her talking to other people on the internet. That sort of thing happens all the time. Or maybe she is married and her husband found out and is the jealous type. I wouldn't get worried about it. If she was a friend that you hung out with in your personal life then I could understand you wondering why.
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
9 May 11
"If she was a friend that you hung out with in your personal life then I could understand you wondering why."
That phrase points out perfectly what I was saying above 
'Friendship' has taken on a new meaning
I don't understand the difference between online and offline when we are all real people sitting at a computer and not robots 
'Friendship' has taken on a new meaning
I don't understand the difference between online and offline when we are all real people sitting at a computer and not robots @mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
9 May 11
I agree that there are some who come online and are able to portray themselves differently from how they really are offline. At the same time there are some, many even, who are exactly the same online and offline and treat an online friendship in the same manner as they do offline, even meeting up personally after years of online interaction
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
9 May 11
Yes but if she was an online friend than what I said about a jealous husband or boyfriend makes sense also. I get what you're saying but some people do not look at online friends as they do their real life friends. To some people they are just words on a computer. Some people become something else when they are online, it's like having a split personality.
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
20 May 11
That's a sad story Bon but I'm sure it happens more often than we'd like to think. I've had on-line friends who promised to be friends always and to stay in touch but they disappeared. To me a promise is something important. If I won't keep a promise I won't make a promise.
I've had people here gush all over me in the name of friendship and ask for my email and then some want me to join other things and when I say "no thanks, not interested", they are gone. Sometimes just swapping emails causes people to disappear.
I just don't understand the rules to these games I think.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
20 May 11
i know what you mean.thats happened 2 times from mylot. but then again, ive met people on here, not met in person you know, thats online friends, about 6 people here that has been very good friends to me and never asked for anything but friendship through internet. 1 person likes this
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
10 May 11
Hi. bunnybon7. Don't feel bad, I am sure that this has happened to many people too. Including me. There are many females that are angry with me, but they won't be woman enough about it, to tell me why. This makes me very angry. I think that it is also wrong that I am not given an explanation as to what I have done so wrong that would make them be upset with me. It will leave me in a state of confusion and sadness too. When a person does you like this, all that you can do is to leave them alone. It is quite obvious that they are wrapped up in their own little world and they don't know the true value of friendship at all. I am sorry that this person is acting like this with you.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 May 11
thanks dear. im sure i will soon get over it. just needed the input here. 
@walijo2008 (4644)
• United States
12 May 11
If I was going to ditch you, I'd let you know why for sure..haha. It would probably be the other way around, I'd be the one getting ditched, I'm not real good at keeping up with people, its a bad habit I need to break. Sometimes I just don't have much to say. I read all my friends discussions, but if I don't say anything, I'm just being me, not good on people skills.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
12 May 11
not gonna ditch you either. you cant help being busy. and im sure you'd let me know you was just busy. thats what i was thinking with her for a while. till i kept getting all these, no subject emails with links in them. then no reply by her then i thought id done something made her mad. oh well. we will see i guess.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
10 May 11
But it isnt everyone is it? I think that a few people have ditched me too but it has not bothered me. U am too busy with work etc to get much time t mylot so I wasn't aware f it before, But thinking now, yes, I have been ditched too. I am sure that we are both nice people so it is their loss not ours. Loo at the nice things your friends are saying to you? Don't let t bother you at all. Not wort it. If yo have the time ten expand your friendship list. Blessings
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 May 11
oh yes, im glad people are so nice mostly on here. i just was looking for input on what could be the problem and they have pointed out some things that could have happened. so im ok with it now. have made my final iquiry to her and thats it. may never know what happened.
have made my final iquiry to her and thats it. may never know what happened. 
@pulangpluma (334)
• Philippines
10 May 11
if you have not done anything wrong then just let them go. friends, if they are really your friends, they would have the guts to let you know what you did. i know i would....and yes you are not alone, being given the cold shoulders without even knowing what i did bothers me. i would rather a person be honest, it gives me an insight on how he/she thinks...
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 May 11
exactly. all i wanted was to know if shes mad or just dont have time. 
@chocokreme (319)
• Philippines
11 May 11
Hi! Thats awful. Well you're on the right path to ask them what's the reason behind this. Problem is they wont answer back. Dont waste your time thinking about them. I guess they dont have the qualities of a good friend. There are many people out here whom you cant make friends with.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
11 May 11
well i know. but she was a friend for a long time. then, poof, no more guess i'll leave it go.