selfish people.

That sounds extreme! it can cause a lot of friction when one partner itn't working! I know this from experience. I am not working now. I don't spend much money however. But it is always difficult and i can understand the feeling of the one who doesn't work.

If her boyfriend wants to spoil her then why not?

Well if it's a marriage, and there's enough money, I can see a stay at home spouse spending on stuff that's not a necessity. But a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, no.

I agree with you one hundred percent! I have been out of work since I had got pregnant and now my son is two months and I still don't work. I'm just not ready to put him into daycare as yet and my hubby i the only person who is working. I never ask him for anything that I don't need because I know he has to pay the rent and all of the bills. He always wants to give me money so I can go shopping and I always tell him no I don't need to go shopping I just want all the bills to be paid. When I start to work again thats when i'll go shopping and spoil my son rotten, after all the bills are paid of course.

I agree with you. I get that she doesnt have a job right now and obviously there are things she will need, like clothing and food. But If she's spending someone else's money, I believe she should try to be wise in terms of where she buys stuff (moneywise) and how often she buys them. It's way more important to pay for necessary things than it is to buy stuff she merely wants.

Most defineately! Sounds like this woman needs a real wake up call that hey, you don't need to spend this much per month when you can get the same thing that is just as good for a 1000th of the price. So what if it's a little worn down...big deal! Like the fashion police are going to come straight to your location right away?? Hope she will get the idea soon!

I would be like you in a relationship if I was not working. I work and still I'm very frugal. Still, from the sounds of it, the boyfriend is handing her the money to spend as she pleases so I guess it's not anyone's business but their own.

Yup. A brat too. I guess part of the reason why she is like that is because, as you said, her boyfriend spoils her. However, one of these days, her behavior and his tolerance would catch up with them. He would suddenly realize what is wrong in their relationship.

I know people like this also. It saddens me when people spend money on things they do not need when they cannot pay their bills. I know someone who was behind on their rent and had their heat shut off (in the middle of winter with three small children)but yet when she got her tax return she spent it on a 50 inch big screen tv. I think it is terrible that she wasted her money in a tv when she had so many important bills to pay. My husband and I are remodeling the house. There are things we have to do such as pulling the old floor off at the bathroom to put down new because the floor had weakened so badly that we can get hurt. We also had to redo the back deck because it was weak and we were afraid that we would fall in. I agree that people should buy things that are necessary, however they do need to buy expensive clothes.

Your friend should learn to value the money that his boyfriend is earning. I think your friend is only after for the support that her boyfriend is giving her and that she doesn't really love her partner. If she really love his boyfriend she will learn to appreciate that what his boyfriend is working for is for their future and not for her personal caprices. If she want to buy those costly stuff, she should find ways to earn her own money.

Hi there, I completely agree with you and this reminds me of beggars cannot be choosey. What that basically means is that one should always be grateful when others give forth the money, in which case we really should use it wisely. Besides in these hard economic times why would be be overspending anyways. It would seem to me that not overspending the partners money is part of being in the teamwork relationship.

I agree! And i know a few people who behave that way. It also annoys me especially when they brag about it but actually it's not their own money that they are using. I feel sorry for there partners who have been working so hard and yet living a very simple life, buying necessary stuff.

Hi SomeCowgirl, While I agree with you that most everyone is selfish to an extent, I don’t believe it is selfish to spend money on your spouse or partner if that makes a person happy. My daughter doesn’t work an outside job, but she is a housewife. She knocks down cobwebs, dusts, does dishes, sweeps and mops the floor and vacuums the house and makes the house presentable for when her husband comes home from work. My daughter’s husband works 14 hours a day and he is dog tired when he gets home. He gets a hot meal, or a cold one if it is cold cuts and chips or something. He spends big dollars on her sometimes. He bought her a diamond engagement ring to go with her band for Christmas. He buys her nice bras from Bali and stuff like that. I don’t think my daughter is selfish at all. Now, from what I am reading, your friend must not do anything in the house? I feel a wife that doesn’t work an outside job or a work at home job, should honor her husband or partner by keeping the house clean and doing things around the house so the husband then can relax when he gets home from work, and maybe even spend some quality time with his wife. My son in law would never expect my daughter to go to the good will to get clothes. We have been because it was fun, but it is nothing that we feel we must do. I work at home…. And don’t have a husband to care for… and I like shopping at Target.

I completey agree. I know of a person who is in the same situation and she is just oblivious of the world around her. She makes comments that are unnessecary and at time hurtful when I am struggling to make ends meet and she is buying 5 coffee's a day. I don't know how you knock some sense in to these people when they are in a sense protected by their smothering significant others who let them get away with this behaviour. In my case its 15 years and 2 kids later and he is only now realising this predicament. I could only wish I had a Walmart here. I would love to shop there. They have everything you could possibly need in one store, and its all so cheap too. Heaven!

I think she sounds more immature than plain old selfish. It amounts to the same thing and the same problem, not being able to pay the bills when they are due. I hope she can find a job she can do. If he chooses to spoil her rotten, it is his problem, I guess, but he will probably wake up and smell the coffee one day and either lose his temper or lose the wife. This is probably the same one that always wants you to go shopping, right? Actually, you can find some nice clothes in thrift shops and people should not be too good to go there. I have the thrift shops on my schedule right now, as I need a new dress for a wedding for a friend. I want a certain color.

I don't think she should be going out and spending money like that either if they do not have the money to cover all of their bills first. They are cheaper alternatives like you mentioned and she should only buy what they have to have for now since money is tight.

I completely agree,it is selfish and careless from your friend to buy expensive things when she doesn't work and she lives on her boyfriend's money,but if he's such a kind person to accept this situation,it's their right to do whatever their want.However,I guess that one day her boyfriend will have enough and will no longer be willing to have two jobs and pay for everything and she will have to do some work as well to maintain the relationship,and I hope that will make her a less selfish people.

Well not a bad write-up but I dont think the lady was forced on the guy cos the guy is not coomplaining. as for U & I, we watch before we leap. However, love can be an incutrable feeling. To love goes beyond spending money on someone, it is willing to die for the other party. O.K?