have you ever had to lower your standards for love?

I can't say that our relationship is a perfect one nor are we perfect for each other. Sometimes I feel like he doesn't deserve me for being so patient and so loving to him. There are also times that I can say I don't deserve him for not being the most understanding girlfriend he has ever had. But most of the time I feel that with all the bad sides and attitudes we have, that made our relationship last. For me, not being perfect for the other makes the relationship strong and last. Because if both have nothing to say about the other, that would make a relationship a bit boring. Nothing to talk about, nothing to argue with and nothing to say sorry for. Of course there are always times when you wish for your partner to be this and that, but why change him/her when that who he/she really is. You have to accept it and just try to work with it if you really love that person. For me, it's not actually lowering my standards, but it's accepting what the other has and not looking for what he/she doesn't have.

each of us creates an image in their mind of the perfect person. but the thing is there is no prfect person. personally I would like my partner to be someone that I have things to talk about, he must be funny, smart, and he must know how to talk, to adapt to different situations. he doesn;'t have to be prince charming but he has to have a thing to attract me...elswhere I would look at him like my best friend... so I don't consider I'm asking to much...I just want someone that would respect and care for me. I wouldn't lower my standards in this matter...I did it once to a "pretty face" and I totally regret it

yes it hurts but has happend wd me but if one partner keeps him/her self low it does not mean you need to keep pressing them so i think its better to try to compromise as elders say it works.

this is really a good topic. when i read your discussion i remembered the time when i was still younger. back then, i used to had this list of standards that i want from an ideal man. something like he has to be tall, he has to have beautiful eyes, a brown colored hair, white complexion, he has to be neat and clean, and good smelling, good posture, and so on. but what's funnier is that, i did not realize that when we begin to feel real love, all those idealism will disappear like you haven't had one before. even if we set standards, in the back of our minds the one we truly love is an exception. but i never regret it. it came to me that no matter what i do, i can never tell my heart when to love and when to not love. and even if my friends laugh at me, or even if the world laughs at me i'd still love him. and for me, true love accepts everything even your failures and your flaws. so i don't really believe in such a thing as ideal, or perfection. it's love when it's the right person no matter what he does and who he is. and you won't look for something something that he didn't have, instead you'd be happier for all he is coz for you he is at his best! and to me he's really the ONE! happy mylotting!

I have to question as to whether there is such a thing as a "perfect match". I would tend to think there isn't such a thing. There might be a certain percentage of couples, probably small, where it could be close or somewhat close to perfect. Relationships can be difficult; they take work on both parties and they need to be nurtured by both people. The last relationship I had was close on 4 years ago. In that same 10 year period I had a serious of bad boyfriends. My last boyfriend was the best boyfriend, and relationship, I ever had. But with him and those other 3 boyfriends I really lowered my standards. There was a short term relationship that would have been the first before these 3. Now with him I wasn't lowering my standards as I was very much in love with him yet with him, the problem was that he didn't love me back. And the only boyfriend who did love me back was my final (last) boyfriend. He was also a man of God (still is) and a born again Christian. Yet he does have certain problems that he will not, or can not deal with. We are still friends and he still holds out hope for me and him. I don't want a relationship with him anymore; not a romantic one. I kind of lost hope for another love relationship in my old age (50's).

Love is unpredictable. That's why the saying that "love is blind" is a fact. And sometimes, or maybe a lot of times. We love the people out of our standards, people we think not ideal for us. Sometimes what we feel opposes what we think. That's the reason why we choose to love the person we love even if he or she has many faults and flaws.

As they say, "All is fair in love". And i agree hundred percent. I do have a standard but it always get overlooked whenever I fall for someone. There are certain factors in life however, that cannot be overlooked because I am in love. First, he should be God fearing and kind. All other matters such as wealth can be accepted by me.