Is it okay for you to accept that your husband had a mistress?

If he cheated on me theres the door by by. In time he will get what he deserves. Once a cheater always a cheater. I think your friend needs to go and see professional help. Maybe the 3 of them are doing a 3sum who knows looks that way to me.

Welcome to Mylot Mariahhh, It was hard but I did forgive my husband (ex husband now for the same reason)... I forgave my then husband for cheating with a woman in the same area. Her husband worked with my husband... he was away at training and she called my husband to get milk. My husband asked if I wanted to go, and I saw no reason to... little did I know that she seduced him into bed and they had an affair after that. I forgave him when I found out, and then things were okay for awhile... but then a few years later he did it again and he got really sneaky about it.. he finally confessed that he loved another woman. He was history after that.

For me, I might forgive but it would be pretty hard. Luckily I haven't had that problem when I was married. My marriage broke up for different reasons but not because either of us cheated. It would be really hard for me to trust again, but I guess after time I could. I've had boyfriends cheat and I just got rid of them. I think that's different than a marriage in that there is a different commitment when you are married. With the boyfriends in my opinion, if they can't commit after a few months into it, then they aren't marriage materials anyway, so why waste my time. But that's just me. I know others don't feel that way.

Hell no! its not acceptable and it is not ok. It will never be ok for my hubby to be to have a mistress at all.

It is never okay to accept your husband's mistress because from a woman's point of view it is akin to saying its okay to share your most treasured property to all who wants it. If it were me I would give the guy an ultimatum. If he loves me then let go of the mistress and if he loves her more than me then let me move on with my life. I am not the martyr type when it comes to love nor do I intend to change my stand. Marriage is suppose to be a sacred vow not taken lightly.

whoa that is pretty brave for your friend to be greeting the mistress. that situation is really difficult to handle but your friend did well and congratulations to her. as for me i think i cannot do the same i would really be upset if that happens to me although i am not married yet but because being married or even having a relationship means they have given to their partner the 100% trust to their partner and that is just a situation of breaking the trust. it would be so hard to mend what was broken but well love has it's own ways if the partner would be sorry for it and that he would never do it again that might be things can be better. but really it's hard i can't imagine myself greeting the mistress.

Acknowledging the existence of a husband's mistress is one thing. Accepting her would yet be another. I believe that everyone deserves a second chance. it would be difficult but i think i could accept it over time. i would not be happy about it but what is done is done.

No I would not be able to forgive. Forgiving and forgetting would be too difficult for me. I could not be-friend a mistress either. I deserve the same loyalty I put forth. Forgiving means that I would have to completely forget and put it behind me and I could no longer trust, which will lead to a very destructive type of relationship. Anyone who loves me needs to respect and value me enough never to put me in this type of situation as I would never do this to someone I love.

No way, I don't play that way! My husband has heard me say it and I mean it. If I ever caught him cheating on me, I would cut it off (and you know what I would cut off). Then let's see if he could use it again.. LOL. And the Mistress (if you want to call her that) would know who I was and she would never forget me. I am not a mean evil person, but I will not stand to be cheated on. They are no excuss for a man or woman to cheat.

well to err is human and to forgive is divine. i will forgive my husband because it can happen to anybody. but where the problem lies is to forget it. because it is a thing of the mind and the mind is very deceptive. whenever he goes out my mind will be telling me he's gone to see her mistress again. its not easy to forget at all

I don't known whether i can forgive him or not but everything will be depended on the situation

It's not ok and definitely it is not alright. I can't forgive and forget. I can no longer trust him. How am I suppose to continue to live with this man when there is no trust and always suspecting or curious over his every moves. Withouth faith and trust, how can 2 person stay together? My mind will also be always boggled with this question, whether he will repent? If there is a first time, will there be 2nd, 3rd and so forth. Love takes time to heal when you hurt it so much. So before any of you guys out there, thinking of doing this behind your wife's back, please think twice whether its viable for you to sacrifice your marriage for a little excitement and thrill with someone else.

Well, i can't trust too. but i can forgive and can't forget...It is hurting i do not know what to do about it... Is the mistress married to the guy still or not..? i do not know how to handle it,but there will be fights against with the husband and the wife because of that..I do not like cheater too, i am also scared and i do not want that the husband hurts me..

by accepting and forgiving what he did, you are only enabling him to do it again. He sees that you love him and no matter how he hurts you he will sooner then later do it again and be back on his knees asking for forgiveness..thinking that its ok.

selfish as it may seem, but i don't know if i would be able to forgive him. the issue isn't just about the mistress, it is mostly on how could he betray me, how could he break the vow we made in front of God, and how could he do such thing that would surely ruin our family and relationship. forgiving is not impossible though but i don't think he would still be able to get my whole trust, brand new as it was. things will never be the same again, and he must suffer for the consequences of his actions. with the woman, i don't think i would befriend her. i don't want a home wrecker on my friend's list, certainly not a woman who would destroy my family. although, i won't show it that i am mad or angry at her, but i would just treat her as she doesn't exist. someone who neither deserve my attention nor my time. i will make her feel the uselessness of her existence.

Well frankly I do not know if I can forgive. Now I can say that I will forgive but do not then I will forgive zanm whether you know that everything depends on the situation in which we put what we have hurt. sometimes a flirt is not something very important is not over. to cherish but do not forget that once you simple can be sown opvtori think the same. nice day!

It depends on the situation. In most cases I would say no, but if my husband wanted to have a mistress or if I found out that he had a mistress, I would go find myself a boyfriend on the side. If my husband has a mistress, it's only fair that I have a side lover too.

My ex had some and it was fine with me in the end. Since in the end I lost all my interest in him. I don't like liars and cheaters. I assume that you don't count a person who is allowed to have more as just one partner? If the man I have now would have a mistress it would be the end of our relationship. This has mainly to do with the fact he strongly believes that is a very bad thing, assures me he is different like other men, etc.