if you were in my place, what would you do?
By monmon20
@monmon20 (58)
Philippines
September 22, 2011 4:35am CST
it has been over already since my break up with my ex. it was not a good year for me. i practically did everything to destroy myself so that he would notice me and hopefully get back with me. but unfortunately it didn't happen. i even tried suicide but that didn't do any good. how i came to this point? someome helped me.and he introduced me to that ONE person that finally made me whole. since the time i have known HIM, He has been testing me and i have been doing His will obediently. and i finally got to this point. few months back i started working and that made me really happy because i am able to interact with other people and meet other people. then few months later my ex also started working in the same company i am working. like in the movies there was a moment where we just stared at each other. i had to break the stare because i want to prove that im a different person he have known. that moment made my heart race so fast like i was actually running and out of breath. coworkers started to ask why we broke up and why he left and etc. and now hhe wants to be friends and that is according to my friend.
i really don't know what to do or say. i don't know if how i should start forgiving him.. i am scared to be his friend again but my Lord is telling me to forgive me but where to start?
1 person likes this
8 responses
@befrindwithme26 (5805)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
Oh ........Well, just to be friends is nothing wrong but if you and him will back again it is your choices..
i know its hurts you,but if he is not God's will for you meaning is not..so just pray the right person fr you,and forgive him..
@monmon20 (58)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
thank you for your comment. i know it is just being friends but i might still have feelings for him that makes it difficult to decide if i should still be friends with him. it is God's will that I forgive him and i am trying to do that by forgetting everything he has done and putting into the past what we had.
@befrindwithme26 (5805)
• Philippines
23 Sep 11
Thank you too...You can forgive what has done for you,because even Christ forgive our horrible sin,and how much more us we are just human same to others who have sin against God..and we should forgive..Sometimes it takes time to forget the pass bad happening,just think positive looks around,and smile think those things that there is purpose and accept all..
@waflay (2737)
• Nairobi, Kenya
22 Sep 11
I think that if you have been able to move on without him then you can be friends again though you don't know his intentions.Being nervous is an obvious thing especially if there was no closure in your break up with him.So I think that forgiveness is the first step and avoid as much as possible talking about your ex with your coworkers because this will always make you drift back to the memories of the time you were together.Focus on the present,you already have one who makes you feel special and gave you a new meaning in life.
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
hi. you still sound so vulnerable and that is dangerous. it felt as if you are still in love with your ex.
i suggest not to welcome the idea of being 'friends' again in the truest sense. you said you had forgiven but that must not mean you will gladly accept him back, even as a friend. all of us, you and me, should allow the heart to heal, take time to ponder, to search. being heartbroken is always heartbreaking and the wounds it leaves do not heal at once. give time for yourself to gather the strength, teach your heart to be strong.
i hope everything will be well with you. bear in mind that the guy is not the only guy in this world. happiness is always a choice therefore you can be happy even without him. there are a lot of fishes in the sea. though most girls or women insists that nothing could replace someone, you have to change this mindset. it is not true. 
@sachinkukale (108)
• Bangalore, India
22 Sep 11
It normally happens to boys yar!Normally i think today's girls are not we see in our Bollywood movies.They break up very quickly and start new affair quicker than that.I also went through same situation buti dont care for her!Just we broke then broke up!There is no matter of testing the same person for same reason again and again.
@shyrine (3)
• Philippines
24 Sep 11
,it is true that forgiving is the hardest thing to do...because of the pain that causes you...at least you make some improvement to yourself showing that you are a different person now and you overcome all the pains that your ex-boyfriend caused to you...in time you will know if you can really forgive this person whom you hated most in the past,,i know it because like you i already encountered this same situation of yours...the pain just healed when we talked after seven years,,and i forgave him because what he did brought to me a better person and i met my true love..forgiveness brings to us peace of mind and acceptance for all the bad things happened to us before,,,if you are really not sure that you really wanted to forgive him, let the time do it for you...i know that in the end fate has its own way...and in that time you will know if both of you meant for each other or not...
there's a lot of reason why all this things happened to the life of people....God has already planned our destiny..
Good luck and God bless...
@Andyvil (793)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
If I were in your place I will forgive my ex. I went through a difficult break up a couple of years ago and it took me a while to get over her. Although I already forgave her I decided to move on remove her from my life. There was no point in being friends with her since I no longer enjoy her company. We became two different people since we broke up and hanging around with each other was already pointless since we both have our separate lives. Forgiving is one thing but being friends with someone you no longer like is another. My advice to you is be civil with him. If you really are over him then don't mind him if he makes any attempts to be with you again.
@imliability (6)
• Philippines
22 Sep 11
There is nothing to be friend with you EX but if you still have feeling for him that is other issue and yes friendship is the beginning of all relationship.
Dont lie with yourself be true if you have feeling with your EX then face it don't face back like you deny it, it will haunt you and it will broke you again.
