If you break up with me, I will kill myself!!
By Aja103654
@Aja103654 (5646)
Philippines
December 12, 2011 9:26am CST
Yes, that annoying and dramatic misguided kind of love is a classic blackmailing method for those crazy lovers to use when they're partners decides to leave them. I find this very annoying.
a part of me wants to tell that blackmailing person, 'go ahead, kill yourself. the world would be a far better place without you, anyway. don't you have something better to do?'
but another part of me wants to say, 'don't do this to yourself. i don't want to be blamed for your death'
If i were the one blackmailed, i would stay with the crazy lover temporarily until i can get help from professionals who can handle this situation. when this has been accomplished, i will leave that partner for good. because if i keep staying with that kind of person, that person will think that his blackmail is working thereby making him worse.
how would you react when you are threatened like this by a lover you don't want to be with anymore? are you the kind of lover who would resort to this method so that your partner would not leave you?
NOTE: I have never encountered this situation in my life. But if it does happen(i sure hope not) i want to be prepared and do the right thing for that person and for myself. there are news stating teenage suicides lately, and the cause of their depression are sometimes because of their sad love life.
2 people like this
15 responses
@SpikeTheLobster (6403)
•
12 Dec 11
The only response I could give would be something like:
"I don't respond to blackmail. I'm not responsible for your actions, only for mine."
@SpikeTheLobster (6403)
•
14 Dec 11
My lady has actually had that said to her in the past (the one about "if you leave me, I'll kill myself"). She was so fed up with the loony who said it that she just told him to go ahead, it wasn't her problem. He didn't, of course. But he did turn up on MY doorstep several years later, innocent as anything, asking if I had her address... to which I just laughed and closed the door.
The "I don't respond to blackmail" part is brilliant. I've used it several times myself, in a variety of situations, and it's a great way to stop someone babbling on or to show them that you're aware of what they're trying to do. It's not the gentlest line in the world but it works.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Haha, that's cool, spike! 
I bet that would shut the blackmailer up!
I bet that would shut the blackmailer up!1 person likes this
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
15 Dec 11
That's an interesting story, spike. I'll keep that 'i don't respond to blackmail' in mind as a default response to anyone who tries to blackmail me, in the future.
that loony guy who turned up on your doorstep's scary. was he not arrested for that?
that loony guy who turned up on your doorstep's scary. was he not arrested for that?1 person likes this
@thugstyle21 (419)
• India
13 Dec 11
I do not understand why people do such kind of ridiculous things when their heart is broken. Don't they see this is a everyday story. And nothing is going to change if you try to kill yourself. Don't they realize this can hurt their families too. If your love is so strong then there's no possibility of doing such a shameful act.
I can understand that it takes lot of courage and time to handle such situations and come back to normal life but killing yourself is what cowards do. And it would really don't bother to your gone ex. Sooner or later everybody moves on.
The best thing is to live a better life and one fine day when the person who left you sees you, will realize what they have lost. I also believe that the one who breaks heart always get punished in the end.
Love is a miracle to be happened in one's life and only deserving ones get love of their life. Plus love can only satisfy your life beside other materialistic things.
So better not to waste your precious life for someone who never deserved you. Let the sucker go.!!!!
Happy Mylotting
@thugstyle21 (419)
• India
14 Dec 11
Yes you are right. There are are always plus and minus of broken relationships. Human nature is always demanding.
Are you in a relationship with someone? :)
@thugstyle21 (419)
• India
6 Apr 12
lolz... yes broken relationships always teach a good lesson in life and makes you stronger. Plus it makes you understand what you are looking in a relationship.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
15 Dec 11
yes, i am. 
Been with him for 4 years
That's why i never regretted leaving my ex, if i had not, i would never have found this guy i am with now. I thank my ex, jerk though he was, for turning me to the person I am now, much tougher and brutal LOL. just kidding
Been with him for 4 years
That's why i never regretted leaving my ex, if i had not, i would never have found this guy i am with now. I thank my ex, jerk though he was, for turning me to the person I am now, much tougher and brutal LOL. just kidding
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
15 Dec 11
he was trying to date another girl behind my back, he even lied that he wasn't. eventually he admitted, i was so mad.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
umm, adhyz, this has never happened to me which i am thank God for.
When it comes to forgiveness, I don't think it's easy but I'll try me best.
my ex did not leave me, I LEFT HIM. so I pray he is somewhere better off, maybe even in the arms of another one of his victims... i mean, in the arms of a girl who would truly love him. The last time i heard from him, he doesn't believe in LOVE anymore, it's like he has lost hope in love.
my ex did not leave me, I LEFT HIM. so I pray he is somewhere better off, maybe even in the arms of another one of his victims... i mean, in the arms of a girl who would truly love him. The last time i heard from him, he doesn't believe in LOVE anymore, it's like he has lost hope in love.
@cearn25 (3456)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
That is a very popular line not just in a movies but also in reality. I haven't encountered such act yet. Hoping that will not happen in my relationship with my boyfriend. I think if that happens, I will not continue with my decision to leave him. But soon I will be able to do it and soon also he will accept the fact of me leaving.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
argh 
I hate those movies! It makes people melodramatic and think it's okay. There are people out there who I have heard about doing things in relation to these, it pisses me off... why do they have to be so unnecessarily over emotional all the time? their a public disturbance!
-sigh-
sorry.
Good luck on your relationship, by the way.
I hate those movies! It makes people melodramatic and think it's okay. There are people out there who I have heard about doing things in relation to these, it pisses me off... why do they have to be so unnecessarily over emotional all the time? their a public disturbance!
-sigh-
sorry.
Good luck on your relationship, by the way. 
@stuckonu (726)
• Philippines
16 Dec 11
I only heard this line in movies and TV series. I have to break up once with my former fiance and thankfully she never said that line. Although she was very emotional, she found a way to control her emotion (and punch me really hard on the shoulder) OUCH! But that's OK because it was my fault that we have to break up.
I think people who uses this threat as a way of retaining the relationship will soon found out that they should have let the other party go instead of keeping them physically but not emotionally. I mean, if the other party is no longer happy with their relationship, they will find a way to end it no matter what.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
17 Dec 11
I LOVE YOUR L avatar!!! 
Never got over him, sorry.
True, that's why they should break up as soon as they can, prolonging it would only bring more pain.
Aw, your fiance was being kind LOL, if it were me I would punch my ex on the face... well, i actually did punch him in the face.
Never got over him, sorry.
True, that's why they should break up as soon as they can, prolonging it would only bring more pain.
Aw, your fiance was being kind LOL, if it were me I would punch my ex on the face... well, i actually did punch him in the face.
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
12 Dec 11
I am not that kind of lover. I love myself more so I wouldn't resort into doing that or threatening someone just for him to still love me. I think I have encounter one and I have told him to go and do it. He didn't do it Maybe he realized his stupidity.
I have a friend who's boyfriend keeps threatening her and telling her he would kill himself. He actually did hurt himself and have some wound using a knife. She really don't love him anymore, and good thing that eventually the guy stopped. I think he's still alive until now
Maybe he realized his stupidity.
I have a friend who's boyfriend keeps threatening her and telling her he would kill himself. He actually did hurt himself and have some wound using a knife. She really don't love him anymore, and good thing that eventually the guy stopped. I think he's still alive until now@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Way to go, enelym! I think the reason why people resort to this is because they think it will work. If we show them that it is not working out for them, they would realize their stupidity and move on, hopefully.
Aw, that's awful for your friend's boyfriend. Do you think he will do it again when he gets a new lover?
Aw, that's awful for your friend's boyfriend. Do you think he will do it again when he gets a new lover?@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Not sure, I hope not. And hope he already got married so he won't do that again.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
15 Dec 11
I don't think marriage will totally help him. marriages can end, too. just hope he is stronger now.
@meljessxena (2315)
• Australia
13 Dec 11
its hard to say what to do or say in this situation without being in it and experiencing something like this. but there is no way anyone should ever black mail anyone especially into this sort of relationship.
from what i think i would do i would seek some sort of councelling as an individual as well as the couple should get help as well.
then i would go from there as getting help may help the situation and well the person might realise that black mailing isnt the way to go about it.
they cant force you to be with them.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Yes, mel. People who have gone through this need all the help they can get. A life is at stake here.
We can't be too sure of ourselves here, for people who have not gone through this kind of encounter. We might do something unexpected because we are frightened as well.
@maximax8 (31046)
• United Kingdom
12 Dec 11
That would be terrible blackmail in a relationship of two that are splitting up. The crazy lover would be depressed and would require professional help. A person saying that sort of thing would be very unfair and unreasonable to the other person.
I got married when I was twenty two years old and we got divorced six years later. The lady that dated him before me had found it very difficult to split up from him. She did that by joining a cult. My ex-husband is Australian and I am English. After his and my marriage ended he dated a girl and she ended up killing herself. I believe it strongly affected him for years afterwards.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Oh my... she really killed herself then, that's awful. Your ex-husband, did he feel guilty about it afterwards? I hope not, it wasn't his fault, but people tend to blame themselves when it comes to situations like this.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
12 Dec 11
i have had them do that many many times. but like you said, they dont actually do as they threaten. i think if someone does it, its not the leavers fault. its something already sick in their head and they would do it eventually even if you stayed. 
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
not entirely the leavers fault, i agree with that. but i don't think the leaver should leave this crazy lovers as they are. they need to help their crazy lover in some way, like seek professional help for them, to avoid problems in the future.
@wadabski (761)
• Philippines
13 Dec 11
Ohhh... calm down... It's not the end of the world. Not to be harsh to yourself. There's a lot of fish in the sea my friend as they say. Stop all this cursing and hate. Let them free if they wish and you will find someone who comes to you. Best of luck, cheers
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
15 Dec 11
haha, wadabski. Thanks for that, but i think you did not read my entire post.
Though I agree, there are plenty of fish in the sea. we have to be careful which fish we choose. We can't simply select one after another without taking a good look at them first
@hnaboro (113)
• Uganda
13 Dec 11
Kill your self? Before anyone says these words, they should think twice. they say alot about you as a person
That you have very low self esteem, instead to making this person feel so important, try to make yourself better by investing in things that make you feel good.
if i received those words? Honestly i rarely take people of that nature seriously, i would laugh at them and wait to see if they carryout their threat.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
I suspect that you did not read my entire post. but anyway...
I agree with you that people who do it lack self esteem, self respect and personal integrity. That they should invest in things that will enable them to grow these things they lack in themselves.
A part of us would want to be cruel to those people, but it's not a wise thing to do, especially if the person who threatened to kill himself is rather serious about what his threats, let's be careful with our words when speaking to this person.
@fantabulus (4000)
• India
13 Dec 11
I also hate this type of persons who told if you will not get me then I will kill myself why you should end of life for those persons who not like you. Life is the best gift of God. Everyone should take care of this.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Right, they have clouded judgments that they could not see things in that light. They fear rejection and abandonment, it's not love i think, it's attachment, that's different.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
12 Dec 11
It's not always said to blackmail someone. I think it's a panic respons most of the time.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Hmm. yes. Some say this out of panic but could not really bring themselves to do it.
@umesh9889 (201)
• India
13 Dec 11
Come on man there are more important things in world then love. There are your parents, your family and companions who love and raspect you more then anythoing else..and lastlt love is mostly painful.... so be ready for it..
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
Some people rely on their lovers too much, growing too attached to them, making them think that nothing in the world matters. That's why I find it annoying for those movie dramas who portray that kind of impression on love. -sigh-
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
12 Dec 11
I cannot judge those who commit such act.
It's hard to measure their feelings and emotions.
That is why we do not think same way and we do not feel same emotions either.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
14 Dec 11
I see. I might have been judgmental there in my post, but I still stick to the belief that it's blackmail that should not be tolerated. Tolerating it will only make the situation and problem worse.
