Valentines day more for women?

United States
January 29, 2012 9:58pm CST
I'm not saying that this is true, but Ive noticed that valentines day seems to focus mainly on the girl in a relationship. The guy buys her gifts and then usually takes her on a date somewhere and treats her really nice. And really, girls don't go through as much trouble for their guys and will get them a few small gifts. But really, it's hard to buy for a guy on valentines day and it just seems like they focus on women more. It's nice to do special things with your love on valentines day but I think that you should show your love for them every day of the year and not just once. The same goes for mothers day and fathers day. As nice as it is to have these special days dedicated to them, they should still be treated nicely year round and not just on their one day. I really wonder how valentines day got to be so focused on the woman rather than the couple as a whole.
15 responses
@kedves (728)
30 Jan 12
Men are easy to please :) If you want to thanks him or show him your appreciation just wear something he finds sexy and at the end of the night .. well you know how to please a man i'm sure :) Valentines is a day for retailers NOT for lovers .. true lovers don't need one day ... they have every day :)
@kedves (728)
31 Jan 12
be a bit picky .. wow if i ever heard an understatement :) :) :)
• United States
31 Jan 12
lol too funny!! The other day I saw a statement that perfectly describes women: Women have no idea what they want, and they'll get upset if they don't get it. I try not to fit the usual stereotypes but at times it's hard because it seems so programmed in our blood..not to mention that the guys in our lives can make it very difficult lol
• United States
30 Jan 12
Exactly! I don't need just one day out of the whole year to show my boyfriend how much I love him and care. But I guess it can be nice to have a whole day where you can really focus on your love for one another. Guys are pretty easy to please and maybe that's why stores are filled with stuff for women. I'm not going to lie, but we can definitely be a bit picky sometimes when it comes to certain things lol.
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
2 Feb 12
I guess this is what happens when a greeting card company (and its marketing people) take over a pseudo-holiday. They take it to whatever they want, and I guess sometime back it was decided that it be focused on the women. I agree that it shouldn't just be for the day dedicated for them, like father's day or mother's day. It should always be everyday.
• United States
2 Feb 12
As nice as it is to get gifts and stuff, I do think that this holiday is just one of those "Hallmark holidays" where the greeting card companies profit. Even though it's nice to feel extra loved on this day, you should be able to feel like that every day and not just one.
@tammytwo (4298)
• United States
1 Feb 12
I agree that Valentine's Day does seem more for the woman and I ABSOLUTELY hate this. My husband has actually made rude comments in the past about Valentine's Day and I have told him I prefer he doesn't do anything for me just because he FEELS HE HAS TO on that one day. Instead I would rather him love me deeply and unconditionally every single day of the year.
• United States
1 Feb 12
You're right. V-day definitely puts the guys in the situation where they feel as though they have to get us all these gifts and do all these romantic things. But if they're grumpy about it, it doesn't make the day fun and you feel like he's doing all the nice stuff just because he thinks he has to. I'd much rather have a nice guy year round and not just one day out of the year.
@soulist (2985)
• United States
30 Jan 12
I have always hated Valentine's Day because I think we should show our love for our spouse every day. Last year for Valentine's Day I took my boyfriend out to dinner. I took him to the casino in Pittsburgh for their awesome buffet and then we played some slots. It was nice but normally i don't care about Valentine's day. I love him and regardless of the day I show him how much he means to me.
• United States
31 Jan 12
I know what you mean. I try to do the same with my boyfriend too. Even though we show how much we care everyday we spend together, it can be nice to have a whole day to just be extra nice and loving towards each other. But I do agree, we should show our love year round and not just one day out of the year.
@watergirl (567)
• Philippines
30 Jan 12
Traditionally, men give women gifts in courtship. Women are given flowers, chocolates, favors by enamored men. Personally, I like the thought of having at least one day when a man still pampers his woman even after years of being together.
• United States
30 Jan 12
Lol it definitely is nice to have a day to be pampered!!
• Philippines
30 Jan 12
That is not entirely true courtknee. The way of celebrating Valentine's Day actually depends on the culture of a country. In Japan, for example, women are the ones who go into trouble of looking for gifts for their boyfriends or crushes. They are the ones who ask these men out on a date or something. I have observed this Japanese culture in the books I have read and animes I have watched. Anyway, it does not matter who goes into trouble. The essence of Valentine's Day is to express your love and be happy with your special someone. For me, as long as both are happy in their relationship, the gifts do not matter much.
• United States
30 Jan 12
Wow, that's a really good point. I'm sure there are people who go through a lot of trouble finding stuff for their man. I've just been nothing how stores and stuff mainly have stuff for women and not as much stuff for men. I'm not saying all people are Ike this, but it's just something I've noticed.
• United States
30 Jan 12
In a way you are right but then again it's not necessary all about the girls. At one time I was in love with a man for years and I always thought of him on Valentine's day. And he was a jerk which took me years to realize and I always had to worry if he would get me something for Valentines day. There was many a Valentine's day went by and I didn't get anything from him. What I mostly got from him was allot of pain. It's been years since I had one drop of feeling for him. I'm living proof it's possible to get over someone you love. But like many women I wasted years trying to make something work that wasn't ever going to work.
• United States
30 Jan 12
I see Valentine's day like a time for celebrating love and friendship. Back in the days, when I was single I used to give my friends presents on this day. Later the entire afternoon me and my best friend roamed around the city. It was fun. I also made sure to buy special clothes for Valentine's day. My friends did the same. Now I don't get to see them because I live in a distant city. However, I always make sure to make my boyfriend's day special. I really despise that whole "lets go out on a date" thing. Our way of celebrating is completely different. We make presents and buy candy boxes for each other.
• United States
30 Jan 12
Aww, that seems like such a nice way to celebrate with your friends
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
30 Jan 12
If you not start this discussion, I really not thinking about that. I would 100% agree with you. Valentine's day is more focused on women side rather than on guy's side. When I was with my ex, I have to get her a bouquet of roses, and something nice to make her happy. She probably doesn't need to scratch her head of what I really like. That is the advantage of women I guess.
@deodavid (4150)
• Philippines
30 Jan 12
Hi there courtknee, I think it focused more on women because they are more mushy than men i think in a relationship the man needs to care for the women more than the women should care for the men in material ways like gifts and dates, men tend to be happy knowing that his woman loves her a lot, but we dont mind receiving lots of gifts. so ladies this time make it rain.
• United States
30 Jan 12
I see where you're coming from. I also think that men are happy when they do something for their partner and see how happy they get. But I'm sure guys love presents just as much as girls. I always make sure I have things for my boyfriend on valentines day.
• United States
30 Jan 12
yes i also think that valentines is a special day for couples and your right it does look like valentines is mostly for women because usually the guy buy the girls there teddy bear, flowers and candy if it was the other way around it would be crazy because i doubt a man want some flowers with a teddy bear. also its hard to get something for a man on valentines. thats why valentines seems to be only for women.
@arjunm (439)
• India
30 Jan 12
Your thought was good. Look if we all day think it a party day lets fun then our life cant understand what is fun special day..So one special day is needed.. And if u told about father and mother day.. Then i want to tell u that i celebrate that day very nicely.. Why u wait for whole world just do yourself if u want....
@jessmess (35)
• United States
30 Jan 12
Just take your girl out and make her feel special. It's just a day to show that person how much they mean to you, so stop hating on the day.
• United States
30 Jan 12
Lol I'm a girl and I have a boyfriend. I'm not hating on the day, I was just noticing how it's mostly about women and how it got to be that way
@Heixyin (175)
• Malaysia
30 Jan 12
True. Well, the culture here is more to guys inaction. Guys should be more initiative compared to ladies. Though, sometimes I wish the ladies would take the lead once in a while =0
@mensab (4200)
• Philippines
30 Jan 12
the celebration of valentine's day is the celebration of love and relationships. it may seem directed to women who are in relationships, but they too give something for their loved ones. i like the idea of setting aside one special day to celebrate love. well, like you said, love must be celebrated everyday, but it becomes boring if it is the same everyday. i like this one special day for love.