My husband has chosen to die...

Thank you, hunibani, for letting me know we are moving in the right direction. Hugs, Maggie

My condolences mysticmaggie. I think hunibani is right - your husband is being very brave and the best thing you can do is show him how much you love him and give him support in his time of need.

The same applies with my adult children of 40 and 33. Every phone conversation ends with "I love you" and every visit ends with a hug and love yous. When my daughter goes to pick up the mail on our main street, I make certain, in the event anything should ever happen to her, to say "I love you. Be careful." I end calls with friends and other relatives with love, too. Those are words that can never be said too much. Hugs, Maggie

Aerous, I'm so sorry your wife was so thoughtless as to leave you in your time of need. I can't imagine turning my back on Bruce; he would never have walked away from me. I hope your pain is brought under control, my friend. Your trust in our God is beautiful. Our God will never give us too much to carry although at times we think He does. He is a strong, but merciful God. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you, aerous. Without God, neither of us would be able to handle this time of our lives. We always thought we would grow old together, sitting in rocking chairs out on our lanai, watching fish jump in our Florida canal. Instead, we have been pulled out of our beloved retirement home and brought to a state we do not like, but to relatives, friends and neighbors who can't do enough to help in our time of need. We are truly blessed. Hugs, Maggie

I want to thank also because you appreciate my comments, my friend. I'm so sorry again to hear about your burden but I know all your pain is not being in vain. All of your sorrows in life is tested from God and I know God give you a trials that you can bear with your life. I don't know what religion you have but better to have a religion that really God chosen for us to live and to go. This is a good thing also to find a religion that really for God so that all you sacrifices are not in vain. I appreciate how you really love your husband and I hope and pray that your husband more strength and patient. Because someday he can make it and succeed all the trials he have in these days...because I am one of the example that exist who suffer more than your husband. But I really thank God, because even do I suffer a lot of thing. I am here alive and continue serving... Great to your husband because your are there to support him. Not like me that when I suffer a big trouble my wife left me and instead of giving me hope and strength. She is the first to persecute me and left me at the time of my trouble... Your husband really luck having you because your still there to provide support...

Before he came home from the hospital, we moved his bed from a dark bedroom to the sunny living room so he can look out and see the wildlife that visits our yard. He smiled when he saw it and enjoyed it for the first few days. Then he began to go downhill and his beautiful, comforting smile has been lost in the pain. Thank you for answering my plea. Hugs, Maggie

I'm glad that he enjoyed how you and your family rearranged the room for him. You should ask them about him having more pain medicine. He needs to be the most comfortable that he can be. So they should be giving him more pain medicine if he's still in a lot of pain. I hope that they will attend to that as soon as possible. Because he needs to be comfortable right now. And you are so welcome. Make sure that you get the comfort,encouragement and rest that you need at this time as well. I'm sure that it is all very overwhelming.

Hospice provides a comfort kit, which includes pain meds, as well as meds to calm him at the hardest times. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you, dabie0, for joining the conversation. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you, Hannah75, it helps so much to know what others went through and discover I'm not going nuts or should feel guilty for anger. Hugs, Maggie

I don't think your story was out of line at all. You, too, had to release someone you loved dearly and that is what this is all about - being able to release without regret. Dignity is something we sometimes forget in trying to keep our loved ones near and this is a time when they need it and want it most. Hugs, Maggie

We are coping by prayers, letting our husband and dad know how precious he is and has always been to us, and by taking the many offers of help from family, friends and neighbors. If any of these did not exist, we could not make it through this time of trial. Hugs, Maggie

It is amazing how something so appreciated, can be forgotten in times of sorrow and intense emotional pain. How are you and your family coping @mysticmaggie?

yes dear I share your grief and sorrow and pray to GOD to give a workable solution to your serious problem ........... Take Care ..... Hugs, Hare Krishna Ganesh

Our God is great and we worship Him with joy. The one thing that keeps us going is knowing Bruce will be with our Lord when his journey here is done. His great love of God has led him through so many rough spots. There is no way I could turn my back on our Lord and Christ. He has brought so many miracles into our lives that I know He is real. Thank you, Ganesh44, for keeping us true in our faith. Hugs, Maggie

There is the resurrection to look forward to.

Thank you, jdyrj777 for joining this discussion. We are definitely going by his wishes and trying to stay relatively cheerful in his presence. His passing will be a blessing for him, but so difficult for his family. He is loved so very much; the world will be empty without him. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you for a beautiful testimony. I will keep it to give our family strength at the final laying down of my husband's head. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you for words we need to hear. It is, indeed, hard to accept, but it seems my husband has made the transition. It is his family that finds it difficult to imagine being without him. Hugs, Maggie

He is probably to beautiful for this world, that is why he is needed up in heaven. I remember all my most beautiful family would pass on, and I questioned God once, and he reminded me that to be absent in our physical bodies is to be present with the Lord. He is probably so ready to meet with his maker, the time that you have left with Him, only show him photos, and share the memories of the times that you and the family had with him. Like the previous guy said , you will see him again one day, and it will be in Heaven, where God wants all his children to be, it's going to be beautiful place, no more heart ache , no more suffering, definately no more illness, we going to be in our different mansions that the the Lord Jesus went to prepare for us, for those that feared Him. So be of good cheer for He has overcome, he has run the race and fought the good fight of faith. He will be leaving your children a good legacy as you say he is an outstanding man. The scripture says a good man leaves a legacy for his children's, children. Not necessary money, but a wealth of wisdom, and faith, and love, and the will to conquer life that is, the most important legacy of all. Stay strong God will never leave you nor forsake you.

ALS is such a horrible disease, taking away life bit by bit. I'm so glad you ironed things out with your dad. That is the most beautiful gift you could have given him. One thing my son always says about his dad is "Even if I knew there would be punishment later, I always knew if I called him for help, he would be there asap." What a beautiful tribute to his dad. Hugs, Maggie

Hi! Yes it is a horrible one and I do not wish it on anyone. You hit it right on the head; seeing someone go bit by bit and there is nothing you can do about it except make their life as comfortable as possible. I remember when I saw my Dad for the last moment; a former 160 lb man age 56 and in one year was bedridden, unable to talk, and lost half of the weight! Talk about WOW! That IS a great way to remember Dad. We may get angry with them, we may not agree with everything they said but we know that they are there in every sense that is possible. Be well--he will be with you. :-)

Flashpointer, we could do no less than give him our love and care during this time. He is a man like no other I have met with his strong family bond. He has done everything humanly possible to be husband, father, and protector of his wife and children. In return, we go to all possible lengths to protect him. Hugs, Maggie

Your husband is also a fighter just like my dad who is fighting his diabetic condition. My dad is struggling to live for me and have attended graduation with a medical doctor escort with him though he is not well walking out to the hospital in his dialysis treatment until after 2 days he never told me he passed out returning home and for few months he was not able to make it and he never told us. Maybe a good father don't like telling their kids about the days he will pass away just to as not getting pressured and worried too much.

Financially, myzhian, you are giving very sound advice. Thank you for joining the conversation. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you, Jenn88. I know he loves us and that is why he has chosen this time to go. He's afraid the bills will be too high or he will be too much trouble. He has never been too much trouble in the many years he's been ill. Hugs, Maggie

He is asked every day if he has made the final decision or if he wants to change his mind. Every day he nods that he is ready to meet his heavenly Father. Should he ever give a different answer, hospice will be terminated and his total care will be back with the family. We are waiting for either instance. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you, 2SnuggleBunnies. A counselor is supposed to come next week. She offered to come as often as needed. I told her about every two weeks, I feel the need to talk to someone who can understand and guide me through the process. Thank you for the suggestion. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you, sjvg1976, for your insightful words. Unfortunately, that's one reason he wants to leave us. He is totally disabled and can no longer do the things he loved. He used to read extensively and loved to talk or debate with people. He was a man who never stopped learning. Within his last two years, he got his real estate license, his mortgage broker license, and his tax preparer's license. With that being just two years, you can imagine what the other sixty years have held. The stroke he had took away his ability to read or talk. He can't concentrate long enough to study another subject. He sleeps most of the day, waking only for meals he might or might not eat. His quality of life is nil. I bought a Wii set and he tried bowling. Being in bed, he can no longer do even that. He has been so brave throughout everything; I don't know if I could have survived as he has done. Hugs, Maggie

Whatever it takes to make him comfortable and happy the last few days will be done. He's that special. Thank you for your kindness. Hugs, Maggie

Thank you for your kind words, harkamaljotsingh1996. He knows his days are numbered; it was his decision. Hugs, Maggie

He's not looking forward to a good life because he would be on dialysis, which is living hell, and possibly a feeding tube, and the full possibility that if he has stints and a pacemaker put in it will destroy his kidneys anyway. Normally life is beautiful, but when pain is all you have to look forward to the beauty fades in the face of agony. Hugs, Maggie