An Internet friend Tells Me He Loves Me Everyday
By NailTech
@NailTech (6874)
United States
March 12, 2012 8:53pm CST
I don't really think this is love though, maybe lust. He knows what I really look like as I post real photos of myself on the site we found each other one. He is 64 or thereabouts, while I'm 48. Do you think thats too big of an age gap in there or does age matter? I don't love him (yet anyways), as I have never met him. But I do like him. I'm not sure what to think of it when he says he loves me?? We will probably never meet as we live indifferent states.
2 people like this
17 responses
@Orson_Kart (6776)
• United Kingdom
14 Mar 12
I would tell you I loved you too if you kept sending me naked pictures. Lucky guy!
P.S. I am also 64.....ish
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
13 Mar 12
I think it's possible that he loves you not mainly because of how you look. Maybe he loves you for your brain too. Men get physically attracted easily, but what really makes them fall for the girl is their brain.
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
14 Mar 12
Maybe in time you will know. It's definitely not love on first sight.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
I hope it is, but we haven't really chatted for very long AT A TIME. Sometimes i don't even message him, but he says he misses me, etc. I miss him too, but there is just so much to talk about right now and the convo usually right away goes to how he loves me, but I just don't know why exactly he loves me, already--LOL.
@nanayangel (7879)
• Philippines
13 Mar 12
Hi there NailTech!
I think that you're right. It would be very hard to identify emotions as love when you are dating or in a relationship with someone and it's even harder to be sure if it's love when you have not even me the person yet. I don't really believe in age gap especially when both are in legal age.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
I seem to be in agreement with the age thing, it doesn't matter. I just worry about what would happen if he were to die before me though, then I'd be all alone again.
Yea, I don't think it is love either, he might just want to be in love but isn't, truely. I really expected it to happen, especially online. But there are some out there that are not online who do the same as well, fall "in love" so fast. I had that happen before as well.
@success1625 (533)
• Trinidad And Tobago
13 Mar 12
I'm in agreement with the both of you, once it's legal, age is nothing but a number but I definitely don't think it's love. I agree with you it is hard enough to identify if two people love each other on a face to face basis, much more when they've never even met each other. That's sound advice
@yanzalong (18988)
• Indonesia
14 Mar 12
Photos often make people start loving. If you two have never met in person, right?It was probably you two were on video chatting, and by the time he saw you, he soon got the hot for you. That's first sight impression, isn't it.He may change his mind later on. Physical appearance is always the cause for someone to start liking, so if he said he loved you everyday, well it all depends on you how you will react to it.
@constancenunn (72)
• United States
14 Mar 12
Hello!
Well, age sometimes does not matter as long as you two ar mature adults. My boyfirend is 60 and I'm 46. But, as for the internet sometimes it can be infatuation or lust. He tells you he loves you everyday and have not yet met you. Are you both planning on meeting soon? if you don't love him make sure you be honest with him if he decides to meet. Things can get DEEPER than you think.
Have a blessed day!
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
14 Mar 12
We have not planned to meet just yet. I am rather slow with things of that nature and like to wait awhile. I have actually never met anyone online for that purpose but almost did once. I found out something about him that made me glad I never did end up with him! He blurted it out one day while we were using yahoo chat. I almost dropped the mouse and shut off my pc after that, for good, ugh.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
We have only been cooresponding perhaps 3 1/2 months. I think he is very lonely though, he only lives with his hamster. Yea, I don't believe age is a big hue matter in the form of relationships, I tend to go for either much older or somewhat younger men, myslef.
@choybel (5042)
• Philippines
13 Mar 12
Some men will say anything to get into some ladies' pants, but I'm not saying this is the case here because I know nothing of him, you, and the background of your relationship. I would say it's really hard to know from words alone and perhaps only time can tell. They say age is not a problem but for some people it is. As you grow older the needs and wants becomes different and I have heard of stories where they just can't stand taking care of a very old partner. I guess it all just comes down to how we handle things when the situation arises, our attitude towards certain conditions and how much we love and care for that person. I do hope you get to know this person well enough and see for yourself the truth behind the words.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
Thanks choybel, your words mean alot. The biggest thing that stood out was about the fact you mentioned stories about how some can't stand taking care of an older partner. I have thought of that. I have taken care of my grandmother for 9 years and it wasn't pretty. I now have parents to take care of but not in the same way (yet anyways) and it does get to be a stressful situation. :(
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
13 Mar 12
I think the best thing for you to do is express how you feel when he says that. Maybe just ask him if he "loves you" or means it as a friendly expression. Some people are very much emotional and friendly, and while they do "adore" you, they use "Love" and love can be and is such a strong word.
Maybe you will fall in love with him, but the best thing to do is be honest.
This reminds me of my ex and I, he told me he loved me and I told him honestly I didn't love him yet, he said I would and he was right. I still do.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
14 Mar 12
I have thought of that and have actually told some others that when they seemed to be moving rather fast, in person as well. I'm not sure whats holding me back from saying it this time.
Thats a sweet story about you and your ex. I hope you two end up together again one day unless it's too unrepairable now.
@TrvlArrngr (4045)
• United States
13 Mar 12
He might be lonely and possibly he doesn't get out much. Encourage him to get out with his friends or to join clubs where he lives. If you do not have feelings for him just gently let him know.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
I do have some feelings for him, and yes i do believe he is lonely. I am too but I still know that over the Internet you have to be even more cautious. I only joined that site to become friends with people, to be honest, nothing more at least for right now. I'm sure they think of thats what they SAY but then they try to make you fall in love, etc.
@fantasticbabe (981)
• Philippines
13 Mar 12
when t come to love age does;t matter. every one comes to a different age, t just that his is way too ahead of his time. if you look back at his age before he may look so handsome than his actual face now. the age may be a gap but the feeling never change. so it is up to your decision if you would like to meet each other and you never know the side of the cons. if you never try to meet you might realize you could be compatible with each other. so there is no harm in knowing if both fit.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
Well, actually he showed me a picture of himself as a teenager, and he looked about the same as he does now, just lots heavier. Hehehe.
Who knows maybe one day we will meet, I'm usually pretty wary of that as the last time I almost met someone, I found out he mistreats animals in a way (I won't go into vivid details but he 'takes it into his own hands' when one of his animals gets too sick to live anymore when he could just take the animal in to get euthanized, and is too cheap to do it) ) That just 'threw' me, and after that I never wanted to chat with him ever again.
@tiffnkeat (1673)
• Singapore
13 Mar 12
So what is it that you like about him? How much do you really know him?
It may be he is lonely, not necessarily lust, but you are right not to rule out that possibility.
Age is a only a number. The older you get, the less important it becomes because the fraction of your age against his age gets closer.
So he knows how you look like. Do you know how he looks like? And does it matter?
There are many questions you should ask and answer yourself. The rest of us really can only offer pointers for thought.
All the best.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
I like that he is still in touch with me when half of the guys on there either got bored or tired of me, wether it be for not giving them enough attention (I get so busy here and other places), and I like his overall personality of how he thinks sometimes (loves animals and defends me if someone happens to be mean or what not, for just a few examples). Lust is a factor, yes. I know, age is only a number, but how many times have you heard of an older gentleman taking care of a sick younger girlfriend, it never happens...I do know what he looks like, he has several photos of him on his page, he is not the most handsome man around and is even a little heavier than I usually like my meant to be as well, but it doesn't matter that much to me as I get older. Thanks tiffnkeat, for the insight.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
13 Mar 12
I think age should not matter if it's about liking, loving or feeling comfortable with someone. The attraction is based on something else as age, in this case also something else since you did not meet in real life. I think it's nice to hear someone loves you, but if you should take it seriously before you met is hard to say. Frequently in person people are completely different as on the internet. I don't mean the inside or what you talk about but the outside. First visual impression and also our nose will tell us if we like that person.
I would never ignore that (my first impression/instinct/feelings).
I have someone too who tells me he loves me. I did met him in person, and we said we would try to be friends and years will tell if we will. But now he is showing different behaviour (ignores I am married, my husband lives abroad so is he) seems to me as if he is building a future for the two of us. So I ignore this at the moment (it just started 3 days ago) and will see if it rings a bell with him. Only time can tell, but I think if you both like eachother it's a pity to throw away this friendship.
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
14 Mar 12
Yes, it is nice to hear that someone loves you especially since there aren't to many people in my life that do say it on a daily basis. But at the same time, I realize that people are alot different on the Internet than in person, and you can't really tell if you love the person or not, yet. I won't throw the friendship away over this unless it gets really creepy. I'm curious to know how the relationship you and your friend are having, did he let go any or is he still in a state of obsession with you? :-)
I do have a few female friends who say it but they say it in a different way and I know how they mean it,as a friendly thing.
@Mashnn (4501)
•
13 Mar 12
Did you ask him whether he is married or not? That would be the first question that I would ask anyone that I meet online. It is very hard to judge whether he is seriously falling in love or not, some men at that age are just driven by weird imaginations and lust. I think the age gap is not that big and is acceptable.
@obe212003 (2299)
• Philippines
13 Mar 12
Same here, lol! i had a chat mate from a different country, we've been exchanging sweet nothings knowing that we would never meet physically, lol! The mwah's, the tsup tsup, luvyah are the usual exchanges, and it felt good having a cyberlover, lol! But seriously, the relationship is far more than friendship, and it will remain an online affair, no more than that.
@luisaR (452)
• Philippines
13 Mar 12
It is not love. Those men who can easily say they love someone in just a span of short meetings moreover just on web cams and chat sites, they are men who basically PRO in line of womanizing. I will believe if they say, I like you very much rather than the oh God, I do love you but is not doing anything YET to meet you and take effort to get to know you in real. I am 33 and you are 48, you probably know better way than that. age does not matter for sure and it's just state distance not country but some men really go fly on the other side of the world to be with the one they really like so much. ;-)
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
13 Mar 12
More than likely that is somewhat true here ( I don't use a web cam anymore for anything and never did before for anything other than that, just chatting...), cause he did ask me for "personal pictures" recently and offered me his. I never did answer that response, as I do not exchange photos in that way, I have much more self respect than that. He does often tell me that he wishes we lived closer, it's the distance I assume thats a problem as well.
@Marvz18 (106)
• Philippines
23 Mar 12
I don't think age matters, as both of you are Free from other commitments, why not? With regards to distance, that would depend on how he loves you (hehehe), why not ask him to come, maybe you will like him also when you meet him... Good Luck and God Bless... :D