Which would flatter you more....
By maezee
@maezee (41988)
United States
March 24, 2012 5:24pm CST
By the way, mature content (sort of) warning. I didn't know which interest group to put this in, so I decided that this was going to be the right one - for now. I hung out with a group of my sister's boyfriends friends at the bar about 4 weekends ago (I meant to start this discussion quite some time ago but kept forgetting LOL). We all went out drinking, tipped a few beers back, played some cards, and so on. One of my brother-in-law's friends was flirting with me hardcore. It was cute, but I didn't think much about it. He's a pretty cute guy, although relatively older than I am (I am 21, he is 28) but good looking as all heck, and pretty cool &/or down to earth as well.
Anyway, I left the bar a little early because I had plans later on.
My sister called me up the next day and said that "[J] said he has a crush on you". I got all warm and fuzzy thinking about this! a crush on me?!, until my sister's boyfriend piped in, "Nah, I think he just wants to f--- her".
I went from feeling good about myself to feeling alright about myself. If he had a crush on me, that would mean it was a personality thing as well and not just an attraction. But the last bit, if it is true, would flatter me nonetheless. I was a little disappointed. Guys talk, so I am assuming my brother-in-law is probably correct. Which is too bad.
Which would flatter more: Having someone say that they have a CRUSH on you or that they want to sleep with you?
2 people like this
11 responses
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
30 Mar 12
Not sure for all the guys out there, but I think that if someone wanted to sleep with me, I'd be more flattered than just a regular crush. But that's just guys, I think most guys just want to sleep with first, then maybe crush later (I think). Just like what your sister's boyfriend said.
So, did he make any moves?
@Zer0Stats (1147)
• India
25 Mar 12
It cannot be denied that there must be something special about this guy that his friend knows best.
@Orson_Kart (6850)
• United Kingdom
25 Mar 12
He has a crush on you, but he also wants to f*ck you. But which is best? There's only one way to find out!
FIIIIIIIIIGHT!!! 
@kccrystalsachi (117)
• Philippines
25 Mar 12
I'm not a guy here but I'd respond by saying that you should get to know him more. If you feel you like him too, let friendship develop. A good friendship would a great start for both of you to get to know more, and in the long run, know more deeply about each other as well. This is not teenage years anymore. This is reaching the point of realizing as to whom you might wake up with one day of you life and yes, I know how confusing it could be but as a suggestion, even from others, it wouldn't hurt much to get to know him more "as a friend" for now, I guess.
Just an opinion tho'.... :-)
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
25 Mar 12
I think that to be honest in this point of my life each would probably flatter me about the same. I'd still feel a little deflated after finding out that it was the latter he wanted and not the former (as in a crush) though.
That isn't to say i'd oblige his wants and do anything, but I'd be happy he was attracted to my body in the least.
@grandpa_lash (5225)
• Australia
25 Mar 12
I can't speak for all men, but I'm sure there are many like me who could honestly say that it's a bit of both. I don't find someone sexually attractive if I don't like their personality as much as I fancy their body.
If it makes you feel good, then look at it positively and give him the benefit of the doubt.
By the way, I find myself answering a few of your discussions, I find them interesting, so I've sent a friend request so I can keep up with them.
Lash
@IrishGal77 (260)
• Ireland
24 Mar 12
Hi maezee,
As you've perceived it, either/or is a compliment but both meant in different ways.
If it were me, I'd far rather a guy had a crush on me rather than him wanting a quick fumble. After all, I'm not a piece of meat or something to be used and then discarded at will; I am a person with feelings, a heart and a conscience.
But you know, your sister's boyfriend could be wrong, I'd say play it cool, follow your heart and gut instinct. Do whatever makes you happy :)
IrishGal77 :)
@sherrybelle (707)
• United States
25 Mar 12
Hi maezee,
It could be both. You sister is coming from a female perspective so she might view it as a crush. Her boyfriend is coming from a male perspective so he might think it's about a quick f---.
I'd recommend that you get to know the guy a little bit. Even if he is older that's not a big deal if it means he's mature.
If you get to know him and he's shallow and proves to be a player then you can assume that your sisters' boyfriend is right.
If he is interested in a relationship that includes quality love your sister could be right.
I definitely think the CRUSH is more flattering because the other option can typically leave a woman feeling used.
