Happiness is much about a choice than anything else
By katie0
@katie0 (5203)
Japan
April 28, 2012 9:28am CST
We can change our day if we decide to. I don't know if we all tested ourselves but I did in different fases, good and bad things happening outside and how this bothered and made me happy.
When very young I think most of us think that happiness comes from that guy/girl we so wanted to date, that the guy/girl also felt something for us, that they admired us. Maybe it's to expect our parents aproval, or to finally find the career of our lives and of course we expect to be wealthy and happy.
It takes a long time to realize that a man/woman of our dreams, the career many admire or that we really wanted, money, material possesions can bring pleasure and satisfaction but not happiness. It feels good to the ego to be admired and rsepected but happy people be like that for their own and not because what others think about them. We can make our life easier with money, we can travel and throw the stress away but happiness is a state of spirit, it can be created.
It's very easy to be sad, to fall and just leave it like that and blame the whole world, God knows how many times I did it, specially as a teenager and saw many people do it. The truth is it takes work, a real hard work to be a happy person because it's all inside, there's no one to aplaud us, no one to salute us, no one to admire our hard work so there's less impulse in the seek of that. People get desperate to find a marriage, a better job but there's no passion (usually) in finding self esteem, to study something daily so we can know more and more, to build self confidence. Most parents don't even teach us that.
A research showed until the age of 5 a child already heard 60% of negativity, and that's coming from those who most love them in the whole world. They heard 'no', 'you can't' and paralizing phrases like that. Maybe that's why we grow up and as soon as we get out of the comfort zone our mind amazingly creates 5000 excuses in one minute! I'm amazed on how of a genious my brain looks when it's creating excuses, it can come up with a lot of them and it doesn't gets tired. Courage is not having no fear but moving or reacting in spite of these excuses. And if we wait too much, it's a snow ball that it just keeps growing.
Happiness is so hard. But at the same time is the only choice possible.
Even when we are alone, let's try to smile more. Don't you feel the action already starts to change the mood?
Wish happiness to everyone. 
Wish happiness to everyone. 7 people like this
7 responses
@kareng (61746)
• United States
28 Apr 12
What you say is so true but sometimes it is hard to do with so many bad things happening to you, your family, friends and in the world in general. I always try to be positive and I put on a positive front, but I'm very sad some days when things are going all wrong.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
28 Apr 12
kareng dear those are the days when you really need some positive
thinking as I have been in some bad bad situations and even living here is not jumping for joy what I wanted to do but being happy puts a good spin on it even here in G old crest retirement center..
2 people like this
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
29 Apr 12
Hi kareng , oh couldn't agree more.
Problems that bothers me the most? I can believe sometimes I live in a world with pedophilism, animal killing, just to mention the worst. People, well there are people that can abandon kids, there are murderers and even adult rapers, these are soooo wrong and what makes me even angrier is that the government could put more efforst in stopping these things than making wars.
I'm not happy all day and not everyday, but I learned and for 4 or 5 years I know it's about a choice and try you know to make the best of a day , that's all we can do really. But after maturing a little (still a big child LOLOLOL) I don't blame people, not even some that done real bad things to me like even taking all my money away for example, I don't hold anger anymore, I realize many things like because of certain paths I became more spiritual and if I had that money I would go in another way, I'm sure I wouldn't have time and think about career but now I get the feeling this reincarnation it's not at all about that.
Something hurts and I realize that in 3 to 5 years I got the meaning of it. Maybe I even deserved? Not in a bad way, I don't feel God punishes us but I realize there's a law of karma, it comes back naturally like gravity, it happens and to good, bad or even horrible people. But it's no punishment, just so we can learn.
But changing our thoughts for example, we can always tell ourselves (like Chandler in F.R.I.E.N.D.S.) 'Don't open that door' you know, we can change our thoughts. To hold anger and not just explode over someone we love because they are close, just calm down and wait a little. With one anger explosion we can really mess our day, and if we hurt someone we can mess a week 
, that's all we can do really. But after maturing a little (still a big child LOLOLOL) I don't blame people, not even some that done real bad things to me like even taking all my money away for example, I don't hold anger anymore, I realize many things like because of certain paths I became more spiritual and if I had that money I would go in another way, I'm sure I wouldn't have time and think about career but now I get the feeling this reincarnation it's not at all about that.
Something hurts and I realize that in 3 to 5 years I got the meaning of it. Maybe I even deserved? Not in a bad way, I don't feel God punishes us but I realize there's a law of karma, it comes back naturally like gravity, it happens and to good, bad or even horrible people. But it's no punishment, just so we can learn.
But changing our thoughts for example, we can always tell ourselves (like Chandler in F.R.I.E.N.D.S.) 'Don't open that door' you know, we can change our thoughts. To hold anger and not just explode over someone we love because they are close, just calm down and wait a little. With one anger explosion we can really mess our day, and if we hurt someone we can mess a week 
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
29 Apr 12
Hi katie: I agree with you. Even if I don't have all that I want for my life I chose to be happy and I'm working for it day after day. My happiness doesn't depend on the things I get or what the people think about me, it's all about myself.
ALVARO
2 people like this
. Even through the internet we can feel when someone have a good vibe, keep smiling!
@sukumar794 (5040)
• Thiruvananthapuram, India
29 Apr 12
Yes! it is your choice.Happiness in fact is what you make it. You can transform your days to one of extreme happiness or alternatively make it end in utter penury and suffering. In that sense ,happiness is relative. Happiness or Sadness..it all depends on how you view things from different perspectives. Once you choose to remain happy and joyful all the time, nothing could forbid you from preserving it in all earnestness.
@roberten (3128)
• United States
28 Apr 12
Ditto, katie0, happiness is not external, it comes from within and we can choose to embrace it or cling to misery. It is fairly difficult to love someone who does not love themselves, and they cannot love others completely either. If you're looking to be a happier you, look inward.
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
30 Apr 12
What a complicated discussion my friend huh!!!same thing also as to our lives. Life is really super doper complicated. You would get crazy if you would really go deeper on analyzing it.Our world we live today is not really the same as we were still young; as we first open our eyes and having a conscious mind.
Though our world is climbing fast on its progress (high technology), characters and attitudes of our new generations become unbelievably horrible;their respects generally gone to our elders;immoralities,family values are already gone;heinous crimes, government corruptions and different kinds of satanic deeds.
To make the long story short - our world is like a drunkard swaying on his feet that almost to be fallen down, and mind you, once it will fall down it won't and it can stand anymore. But, there are few people who already knew this would really happen that's why they never worried but instead of being afraid they turn this situation into their "winnings" because they have already peace of mind in spite of what are the worst happening around us these days.
I can't elaborate well to you what is it because this space is too short to do some discussions if you're interested to know. What can I say my friend is,we could not really find solution this global (worst) situation. Why? If you can notice it, there were so many great leaders who hold the reigns on our government from the past years til now, is there any constructive global changes? Nothing but it worsen. The only thing we can still live peacefully in the midst of this wild wild world is to have peace of mind. How To Have It is a lot of explanation to let anyone who are interested to understand.
Have a nice and peaceful life my friend...
Mobhomeir here
043012 0829
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Good day katie - I deeply understand what you mean and I am glad you saw "the secret". I've seen it also and I learned a lot from that secret. We will just try apply and share to some one what we've learned on that scene.
Peaceful day ahead of us my friend...
Mobhomeir here
050212 0507
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
2 May 12
I saw that movie too Kat..and honestly I am trying still to apply those all of that secrets. Thanks for that BR...its early morning here yet, I hope I could pass the day peacefully in the midst of my paucity....
Nice day ahead my friend..
Mobhomeir here
050312 0455
@Suebee (2013)
• Canada
29 Apr 12
I too strongly believe that happiness is a choice. People are as happy as they make up their minds to be. One can choose to be miserable, unhappy, sad or whatever. Lord knows there are enough things in life that could make people become bitter or respond negatively. But one can also choose to be happy and respond positively to those very same things that could make them bitter. It's all in what you decide to do, how you wish to respond. No one else can make you happy. Some people might try extremely hard to make you happy but if it's not in you, it just ain't happening. Happiness doesn't have to be hard. In fact, choosing happiness is not hard at all. It's all a mindset.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
1 May 12
I'm glad you got there. I'm understanding lately, I'd say the past 2 years that things might be different at least inside, that I could make the choice to stay in a thought or just let it go if it's not good.
It requires some effort I think, it might be easy to those who are used to. To be unhappy, unsuccessful we just need to let go and not try to reach anything in life, now to get happiness, satisfaction, all the good things we must work for 
It's a good thing to watch happy people, in time we get them and how they got there.
I find it amazing that Louise Hay says she has her bad moments. So it is really about every moment. She could master happiness like a pro, one might think but she's human and sometimes bad thoughts wonders around her.
It's a good thing to watch happy people, in time we get them and how they got there.
I find it amazing that Louise Hay says she has her bad moments. So it is really about every moment. She could master happiness like a pro, one might think but she's human and sometimes bad thoughts wonders around her.
@kylegwapo (12)
• Philippines
2 May 12
Yes, I totally agree that happiness is a person's choice. It roots from one's intention of what one wants to be.
For me, our emotions affect a lot on how we deal with life. But then again, whatever emotion we want to dominate from the moment we open our eyes and start our day, to the feelings we keep before we sleep is a product of our choice.
It's my philosophy and belief that although it is common that we hear from anybody saying that, "I'm not in the MOOD"; but think about it, it should have been, "I'm not in the (proper) MODE". Again, emotions (and that includes happiness) is a product of our active participation -- our CHOICE. Hence, it should have been proper to call it mode since we can always choose the emotion that we want to be in.
We can be free from the slavery of any unwanted emotion. All we need to do is to choose to be happy.
:D
