Is it impossible to change a person's perspective on things?

It has all got to do with society norms. Nonconformists have no qualms about accepting whatever they fancy disregarding what society approves or disapproves of. Most as you know follow society norms and to change their thinking is quite a task. Finally it is what she thinks that matters and not how you feel about her. She is fortunate really that she has someone who accepts her the way she is. You will have to have some patience and slowly get her to accept her 'fate'!

Now that she too has grown fat, perhaps her perception of fat people will change. She too will understand now how it is to be one. And now is the time for you to show to her, that no matter how she appears, you still like her.

Maybe you both need to change your way of thinking. People discriminate usually because of their up bringing, people they hang around with, and the media. I wouldn't try to change her. I would try to be her friend and be happy with that. You said she is shallow and it is very hard to change a shallow person.

We should always be careful on what we do and we should not perceive other people differently since they look different from ous or their imperfections. The reality is you can also find yourself faced with the same problem. I just hope that your friend will realize that now that she if facing the same problem. It is good that you are there for her despite the way she treated you.

My guess is that your friend does not like herself. You said that she discriminated against fat people. If she doesn't like fat people and she has gained 100 lbs, then she has become the very thing that she does not like. She needs to learn to love herself. You know how hard it is to change your own perspective, so think of how hard it is to change someone else's! I wouldn't say that you are wasting your time exactly, but she isn't going to change her way of thinking until she is ready to. It's like getting someone to quit smoking. It just ain't gonna happen unless they want it to happen. As for discriminating against overweight people, well, it's just something that some people do. Personally, I don't...my own husband is overweight (I am not) and even his doctor has told him that he has to lose weight. I know it's not going to happen until he decides he wants to lose weight so I don't say anything at all to him about it. However I do wish he would exercise more just for health reasons, as we all know being overweight contributes to a multitude of health problems. Some people see overweight people as being lazy or lacking in self respect hence the discrimination. We all know that that is not necessarily the case but those are labels that society in general has attached to "fat" people.

If you try, you can change her but try to tell in a very loving and understandable way. Some people are stubborn and think they are always right. Friend, I suggest you to reduce weight as overweight can cause lot of health problems at a later stage and you have to spend a lot of money in the hospital.

It is possible, but with lots of effort. It took years before we could even get my mom not to eat a full course meal. We always worry about her because she too is overweight... It took her own will and when she feels that sshe is too heavy to walk longer hours in the mall, she realized she has to do something about it, and that is when we told her what she can do to lose some weight gradually... now she even volunteered to use the thread mill and walk a few minutes each day. I think people when it comes to things - we always have our reasons, and our ideas are fixed on one thing - one idea- and our mind is shut on other things and options... sometimes we would even formulate our own reasons and stick to it as if our life depends on it and we become hard headed... right? I think maybe what you can do is to offer her company, like you might also want to do the change about yourself too, when people see that others have embraced new things and accept to change, they see an inspiration... and with this you would not even need to like force her to diet, etc... you get the benefit to be with her at the same time as well... =)

To change how someone thinks prove the execption! She's fat now. Ok but what was it she hated fat people for to begin with? I am of a hefty nature and I would swear people think I am lazy. Until they watch me work. Of course my brother is bigger than I and far lazier. Not the point, the point is what does she hate fat people for? Is she those things? Prove to her she's not! I personally don't know what she could have against fat people other than consumption issues and lazy. In this situation the man she is married to seems to be the complete problem. Being a victim of verbal abuse once the attacker is removed things can and will get better.