Lending Money

Whenever someone borrows money from me, I consider it to be gone. I do not expect it to be coming back to me. When the debtor pays the money back, I will be thankful. If not, then it's okay. Next time s/he attempts to borrow money from me again, I will make up excuses and say no. You need to make a stand. It is your money anyway. If you still tolerate your colleagues' attitude, they would continue to abuse your kindness. However, if you are too shy to ask for their payments, then maybe do not allow them to borrw money from you next time.

Yes, it is indeed a dilemma. Although it is your money, it is never easy to ask them back as we Asians are always careful of preserving other people's face(pride). I would have used the technique below: I will not ask for it on the day it is due. I will wait for another week. Then if no action is seen, I will bring the matter up when we have conversations. ..."what about the money now? Will you pay me tomorrow as I need to use that to buy something"... But make sure that you won't lend again whether the old debts are collected or not.

When people know you have a savings and you have a soft heart they'll turn to you and later on abuse it. They will keep coming back even if borrowing money is no longer important as before. It become a routine. For some it's easy to borrow someones money and when it comes to paying as if they don't owe you something. If you remind them they get mad and start saying bad things about you.

I find it hard as well especially when it is a friend who has borrowed money from me. There was even a time when I really don't have any money left, I really wished to ask the money borrowed from me from a friend but I really can't ask for it because I am too shy to ask. I know it's my money, but I am also thinking maybe she also doesn't have the money to pay yet because she hasn't talked to me about it. I also have a small business that I am having a hard time asking for the payment for those who ask that the payment will be done on the payday. Payday came, but still now money. It's a good thing I am a little patient with these people. If not, I could have ask for it already in a bad way..lol!

It is messed up because you should not have to hunt them down to collect your money. I have learned that lesson a long time ago. That is why I stopped lending money to people. If I can afford it, I just give it to them because it stops the hassle. They really have to show me they deserve it and be there for me when I need them.

In all truth, I would just stop lending it all together!! Just ensure that each time they ask to say that you are not having a good month and you really do not have much to spare. I think after a while, they will get the point and not come to you when asking for money anymore!!

Lending money should be done within your discretion. I have been asked for money before, and I have lended more. Usually the more you lend, the more you seek to collect it. I don't usually ask for petty cash back which is usually under $5.00. I am not a bank and when people always ask me for money; I can almost say they don't respect me. Don't be shy about collecting your money. It is yours to collect. Helping people out is honorable, enabling them to use you is out of the question.

I never lend money out to anybody because I am always afraid that it will ruin our friendship. In most cases people never pay others back and I do not have the money to lend to others.

I find it hard as well especially when it is a friend who has borrowed money from me. There was even a time when I really don't have any money left, I really wished to ask the money borrowed from me from a friend but I really can't ask for it because I am too shy to ask. I know it's my money, but I am also thinking maybe she also doesn't have the money to pay yet because she hasn't talked to me about it. I also have a small business that I am having a hard time asking for the payment for those who ask that the payment will be done on the payday. Payday came, but still now money. It's a good thing I am a little patient with these people. If not, I could have ask for it already in a bad way..lol!

Yup, and that's the problem. It's actually funny isn't it? You were not that one who borrowed yet you are the one who's shy to collect when it should be the other way around. We are on the same boat, but luckily, I don't lend money anymore, since I seldomly went outside the house. Anyway, why not just deposit it in a bank? if you just want to save it? at least you'll get interest from it. Or you can even invest it somewhere safe and get profit out of it?

you just need to speak to them frankly that they owe you something. I think you're a shy type of person and i'm a bit like that too.

Hi there! You should definitely collect your money. Being shy won't really help you. And it's not savings at all if they don't pay you. It would be better if you just put it in the bank since it has interest...that way, you can definitely save. Hopefully those friends/colleagues of yours will pay you back as soon as possible. Have a good day!

Hi,girl_thinking, I have the same experience as you have. When I was in junior middle school, I lent money to my two dear friends because of they want to buy gifts to their bf. But until, they don't contact with me any more. I am so dissatisfied with them whenever I think of this.

i'm like that as well. I often lend money to my friends especially when they need it. But sometimes they forget to pay me especially when they borrowed a small amount! And it takes really long. But what I do is, every payday, I ask them if they can pay me on that date. It's hard if you don't keep up with the people you lend money to. It's okay to lend money because you're helping them, but if you're going to be in need, it should only be fair that you ask for your money back. When they borrowed money, it was given to them easily. Payment shouldn't be as hard. I don't mind if the person tells me that they can't pay just yet. But they don't have to run or hide from me, and they can tell me straight up if they can't pay it yet. I am an easy person to talk to. I don't mind if you really can't pay because we always have trouble sometimes. But I appreciate people who are honest, than those who I have to chase all over the place just to find out if they can pay or not.

with some people if you don't ask you will never get it back, You just have to ask them it is your money they owe you so get up the courage and do it.

I guess you should be more strict on collecting to them and don't be shy cause it will benefit them for sure.There are some people you used to borrow something but still the one who get angry when you have to get the things that you lend to them.

You shouldn't be shy to collect your own money. Next time instead of letting your money be borrowed just save it in your bank. That way your money is safe and you also earn interest from it. Some people are just a great debtor, once they get the money they forget to pay it or the worst thing is have no plan in mind to pay it. I'm done with people like that, who owed me money and never pay back.. I never asked them coz I know that they knew it for sure and for me it's not that biggie.. the good thing is they can never borrow money from me again.

It is really hard to lend a money. In your state you should stop lending your money since in that way you are really not saving money at all and you're being shy to collect your own money. It'll be a problem if they don't pay you. If you really love lending money you should think first if that person is reliable (he/she will still pay you).

collect money from friends, you can simply tell them that you need something, for holiday, gift for someone, for investment...and stop giving money..there are people who never return money

you could try borrowing the money you leaded to them back.and then remind them that they owed you that money and never payed you back.