Appearance VS Reality
@WumpyPPancakes (117)
United States
July 5, 2012 10:02am CST
When we get into relationships, we have this illusion of expectations that we want a mate to be. We find these qualities within a person, but we continue for them to solely act like these qualities--overlooking, sometimes, that a person doesn't only possess these qualities. What tends to happen is one or the other: we are able to really unconditionally accept this person for who they are, OR we drift apart from them...leading to the relationship ending at some point.
Why do you think that relationships end? Is it the person? Is it both persons in the relationship? Does it have to do with maturing? Does it have to do with age? Does it have to do with the direction each person is going in their lives?
2 responses
@PhillyDreamer (3039)
• United States
5 Jul 12
Relationships end because people can think of a million things they want their ideal mate to be, but they have no clue who they are. I always had this image of the perfect woman and I chased after it for a long time, but the fact was I was looking for someone to give me happiness, when the happiness had to come from me. Looking for someone to make you happy leads you to start having unreasonable expectations in a relationship, and when your mate is unable to meet those expectations resentment starts to set in. It's best to take care of your own happiness and share that happiness with your mate, but they should also be able to share their happiness with you. This leads to the ideal relationship.
@WumpyPPancakes (117)
• United States
5 Jul 12
I agree with you. I've been in a relationship for seven years. As most, if not all know, it has been difficult. Yet, what makes it work is that we try to make ourselves happy--and not happy for each other. I believe that you, whether in a relationship or not, should come first with regards of being who you are and being accepting towards who you are. You are the one with the power to make yourself happy--not the other person. I think that you should always remain true to yourself. And people do mature and change in a relationship individually when they first start the relationship. Both people could have gotten together because they had a lot in common, but over the years, both people's perspectives could have changed throughout that time. Sadly, those two people may not have the same thing in common anymore and drifted apart.
@choybel (5042)
• Philippines
5 Jul 12
I think it has to do with contentment and the attitude towards compromise. Some people seek things and when they do not get contented they seek compromise, while others just ditch whatever makes them unhappy. Relationship is about being able to accept some things and work somethings out, give some and take some, and to some it's all about whatever works.
