Breaking Up Due to Emotion

Yanza, in our daily life it is usual that there is ups and downs. What we should practice is, patience and always deals any problem with the best solution. When there are too many problems cramps together, we should always take time to solve one by one. In the end you will discovered that the problem is not as serious as it was first appeared. It is pity that nowadays, many couple don't have the patience to solve their problems and resulted having to split up. Indeed, having too much emotional feeling when dealing any problem is not the correct way. It is always better to stay calm when want to settle any problem.

thats right...emotions influence them and killing their brain..

Hi Yanzalong, Well emotions are of course a part of it but they are a part of everything we do pretty much. I mean, lack of emotion will cause a break up also. I think people get under pressure and stress and don't communicate well with each other always. They tend to express their anger very well but are not so comfortable in expressing the positive thoughts that might help them through a tough time. Eventually, harsh, hurtful and angry words creates such a wall that it is almost impossible to even enjoy being around the other person.

well, i don't think so...if both understand and love each other so much, relationship will be stable, but just one is not good enough in love, angry, always ask this and that, don't care a partner, don't know to take responsibility...then for sure the relationship will be broken... I think love/relationship looks like dancing, we need both accompany together, only one person can't dance, right?

I agree with you my friend, emotions are the root cause of many problems, because emotions are at the center of relationships. If you think about it, you get attracted to a person by the first thing they present, their outward appearance. People can disbelieve that all they want, but the fact is first impressions are important, and the first thing you know about any person is what they look like. If you like or are pleased with the way they look, like and pleased are emotions. Then your emotional commitment to a person can grow into more than friends, and then love, which is definitely an emotion. Hate is an emotion, and unless you witness an infidelity, trust is a feeling, and the way you feel about something is based on emotion. Then there is the circle of life; all things that are repeating can be graphed as a sinusoidal wave (a line curved to show repetitive peaks), or a circle, because they can all represent phases. If two people stand on a line, and that line represents a growing relationship, you each start toward the middle, and walk to the positive end, the other opposing end represents the pinnacle of negative feelings; hate and loathe. Now roll that line into a circle, so that love and hate are at the greatest distance apart, so love would be at 360 degrees, and hate would be at 359 degrees. The greatest distance is not at 180 degrees, because that is only half way around the circle. Look around the circle the long way, and hate seems far away, but in reality 359 degrees is right behind you. So you can take the long walk and let love grow slowly to hate, or simply turn around, so it's no wonder that lovers can turn to haters so easily. To marry someone you usually love them, loss of love, or introduction of hate lead to divorce, both of which are emotional in nature.

Well yeah it's always the emotions that cause such things but also it's the types of actions people take which causes these emotions. As an example cheating on your partner. No one told them to take this action yet they did and of course that causes an emotional response. Also I think people just jump into arguements and are quick to anger. Rather than taking some time to calm down and have a conversation they just blow up or keep it inside until they decide to blow up!

I think, it's really not wise to make decisions when you're filled with emotions. Like what the quote says, "do not make decisions when you're angry and do not make promises when you're happy". It's true because the heart is deceitful. It changes from time to time. Not even us can understand ourselves sometimes. When we're angry, we have the tendency to just quit and forget about everything. Then, when anger subsides, that's the only time we realize that we were just driven by our anger. And, when we're overly happy, we easily make promises. And when that happiness is replaced with disappointed caused by the other, the promise remains a promise. Only now it's a broken one. Good point and good topic indeed!

Emotion is what brought this two person together in the first place unless it's a fixed marriage or something else, so it is natural that emotion could make the bond stronger or ruin it. Uncontrolled emotion is the problem and I believe it is easier said than than. People going through a lot of stress can easily be emotional and actions can really be either extremely immature/irresponsible or nearly illogical, thus creating problems of their own. Learning to control intense emotion is definitely not easy but probably doable.

Uncontrolled emotions of anger and hatred can lead to any destruction. Some marriages ended into separation and divorce due to many reason and emotion is one of it. Once the couple feels that love is not already there and there is no more respect in between- maybe divorce or separation is the best solution to avoid more complication or damaged. In this situation, kids are the most affected, unless both parent keep a good relationship with the kids after separation.

I think that if you cannot control your own emotions, you lack maturity. Because a matured person knows how to delay his emotions, it means he pause and think first before speaking or acting. My father told me long time ago that being too sensitive will not help strenthen every marriage. Marriage is a union of two different individuals. They were raised differently and have different personalities. It is normal that during the early stage of their marriage, they would find it hard to deal with each other. It will be harder if we always use our pride. We should always remember that we married this person because we love them so when difficulties arise, we should use that love and not pride to overcome that situation. About what happened to your friend, we were always told by elderly that marriage is not like a rice that we can spit out if we found it hot or spoiled. I think that they were not able to strengthen their commitment with each other and to their marriage that is why they end up divorcing each other. Commitment is necessary to every marriage but we don't just learn it over night. That is why courtship period is important. Our experiences during those times would help us strengthen our commitment with our partner. And once we knew for ourselves that we trully love and respect this person, that is the time that we go on to marriage. It is more like a preparation. Like if we have plans of building a house, we don't just build it right away, we prepare and plan for it. The same goes with marriage. We should be fully equip so that when problems arise, we would not be easily discourage and give up our marriage.

Hello yanzalong, I have to agree with you. I believe emotions have a lot to do with realationships for good and bad. When we get angry or hurt we tend to lash out on people we love. We say hurtful things that we do not mean and in time that can affect any relationship. It is hard to control ones emotions. Emotions can also build relationships too.

I think that it is more than just emotions that break up relationships. Emotions can be talked out but if the two involved are not right for each other, no amount of talking will help. I come from a large family. My mother has 11 brothers and sisters. All of them are divorced at least once. The main pattern to this is the fact that all of them got married at an early age. With most of them rushing into the marriage before they got to know the person. While emotions did have an impact, good and bad, that was not the only reason. Some people just grow apart over time.