Do you access your husband's email or social website accounts?
By jureathome
@jureathome (5361)
Philippines
July 18, 2012 3:04pm CST
My husband and I share passwords, not intentionally trading it, but there was one situation before that I had to let him access my online banking account so I gave him my user log in info. Similarly, he had to let me get into his email to check on something so he gave me his information. From then on, we never changed our passwords, so I can still open his accounts. He seems ok with it.
Once in awhile, I access his YM and check on conversation history. Im glad I don't see any monkey business going on there (and, he doesn't know im still opening it). I even see some girls trying to reach him, but he ignored all those. I hope it stays that way, forever.
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1 person likes this
9 responses
@petersum (4522)
• United States
18 Jul 12
So you both use the same password for several accounts and never change them.
I'm sure all the hackers out there will be pleased to hear this and no doubt they would thank you for making their work so easy!
Do I have to spell it out? F o o l i s h.
1 person likes this
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
18 Jul 12
We don't share the same password. We have our own which we have used since then. Of course its not as stupidly made as you thought.
1 person likes this
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
18 Jul 12
My partner and I also knew every information that is going on specially in the internet, but despite of knowing all of that, never did I open her conversation in any social networking sites.. Maybe even if I know all of it, I still respects her boundaries.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
18 Jul 12
I used to think that way, until something happened in the past. It wasn;t that serious but it could lead to something if left unattended.
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
26 Jul 12
My husband and I know eachother's passwords. We don't have any secrets, and I am not afraid to give him my passwords. He doesn't hide any passwords from me either and I have access to his bank account, his emails and his social networking sites. I don't usually visit his social networking sites or the other sites that he is a member of, but I sometimes use his netbanking because we share the money that we have. Sometimes my husband asks me to check his bank account for instance if I am online while my husband is doing something else. If he wants to check my bank account and any other account that I have he is welcome to do that, because I don't have anything to hide.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
Good for you. It's about the same set up we have here. Either of us can access the other's accounts. Even before we got married, we have access to each other's accounts. It didn't happen because we were doubtful of each other, but due to urgent matters that we had to give each other's passwords at different occasions.
@ShyBear88 (59304)
• Sterling, Virginia
20 Jul 12
No I don't know my husbands password to anything and he doesn't know mine. But if one of us has there stuff up we both no we are equally free to look at what we are doing. Its not like we are trying to keep things from each other it's just that is how we have our stuff set up in case our daughter touches the computer. But if I need him to check something for me or me for him we will tell each other the password.
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@ShyBear88 (59304)
• Sterling, Virginia
23 Jul 12
You can have a lot of privacy as a married person or not as married person. It all depends on the relationship that you have with your partner. My husband doesn't look at my cell phone we don't check each others emails or facebook stuff. I don't got go digging for trouble or anything just because I know my husband. I have less privacy with the fact that I have a 1 year that fallows me to the bathroom where I can pee and be alone for 5 minutes till my husband gets home from work.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
24 Jul 12
I guess it does depend on the kind of relationship you have, and the type of character you each have, and the environment you dwell in.
My husband works in a contact center where most of the population are people in their 20's-late 30's. There are a lot of issues with couples infidelity, having extramarital affairs, and all those hokey pokey. Even if I give him 200% of my trust and faith, its his environment that I am not comfortable entrusting him to. So, Im just doing what I can to prevent things from happening, and then being a sorry wife too late.
I've once saved us from a possible marital problem with my control on our personal accounts and investigations.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
Right. If there's nothing fishy going on, there's nothing to hide. When you're married, you have limited privacy. Unlike other people would say, I don't think a spouse should feel bad if the other wants to see what's in their tanks.
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@shahamed (92)
• Singapore
20 Jul 12
Even though you are just trying to keep your spouse away from trouble, you must still place some trust in him. Relationships are built on trust and a slight smear on that trust could break the bond. If your husband actually finds out you have been checking his email, he will be very heartbroken. It is best for the both of you that you let him have some of his privacy.
That said, i am very happy for you that your husband actually rejects the girls that are hitting on him. It is very hard to get such a trustworthy spouse who is so firm on his decisions to not cheat on his significant other. I hope both of you will lead a happy married life.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
I do hope Id get to that point, where Id be more comfortable living a life with no insecurities and no suspicions. Who wouldn't, right? Im sure time will heal. ![](/Content/images/emotes/happy.gif)
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@katcarneo (1433)
• Philippines
18 Jul 12
There have been instances when my partner and I had to access each other's emails or online bank accounts--always with each other's permission. However, we never look into each other's personal messages, not even our cell phones. I can't imagine looking into his conversation history. I wouldn't want anyone to check mine, so why would I want to see anyone else's? We have a couple friend who's the exact opposite of us---she checks his everything! When his phone beeps, she will be the first to check the message. She goes through his social networking account and looks at all his friends and deletes those she is suspicious of. It's a crazy way to live and we are surprised he still hasn't left her. I think you should stop checking his messages once in a while. Surely he will not like it. If you do something that you cannot tell your partner about, chances are it's wrong.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
It really is not a healthy way of living with your partner. I did not want to be in this situation, but Im the type who doesn't easily give my trust and all the more not easy to trust again. Well, im not losing hope, Im sure one day, someday, all these suspicions will go away and I will live a happy and secure life again with my husband.
Don't get me wrong, we are happy and I trust that this relationship will get stronger over the years.
I just can't trust the world today. So many people don't acknowledge and respect marriage anymore.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
18 Jul 12
jureathome I trusted my husband and never looked at his mail unless he wished me to read it. while I was married we did not even
have a computer. I trusted him and he =rusted me and we neither'of u s ever broke that trust![](/Content/images/emotes/thumbdown.gif)
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@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
More important than trusting each other is not breaking that trust. Once its broken, it'll be hard to mend.
@sbucu57 (55)
• Philippines
18 Jul 12
I cannot see anything wrong in visiting the sites your husband went to, but sharing the same passwords, though not intentionally trading so you can check on him now and then because something happened in the past, though not a major one gives a little bit of a hint.
You've mentioned until now he does not know your accessing some of his accounts. What if one day you find out he changed his password and you can no longer access it, what then. Will it bother you that much ? Some people say old habits die hard.
What if for some unknown reason, he suddenly become interested on the sites you visit, the comments and discussion you join and all of a sudden read this particular discussion, what would you feel then if he founds out ?
Trust have so many colors and definitions depending on the parties concern. More often than not, we really do not like it when we are given our own dose of medicine.
That is just a friendly tip.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
My husband actually knew and Im sure he knows I check on his email once in awhile. One time, he even ask me for his password because he forgot.
Im sure he wouldn't mind. We even share the same cellphone right now, because his got broken. Since Im not working and dont go out a lot, we dont see the need of buying another one, at the moment. I read his messages, he reads mine.
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