I could use a little parenting advice here....

Tweet

Okay, here's the situation. Last June I moved from Colorado to Delaware because my (now ex) husband and I were seperating. He was seeing another women, so I brought myself and our two children to Delaware to rebuild a life without him. Our divorce was finally this past May. I am in another relationship now, and the kids father remarried in August and he is expecting his first child with his new wife. My kids do like his wife, and they seem to get along, they are happy about the new baby brother that is coming. I thought they were adjusting pretty well. However a few nights ago, my son told me that he still blames himself for the divorce because he is the one who told me that his dad had a girlfriend. (their father brought them around her, before I knew of her, and told them not to tell. He taught them to call her Jack, so that should they slip up, it would just sound like dads guy friend- my son spilled the beans about Jack being a girl when their dad brought them home from her house where he saw a picture of her and his dad holding hands and was confused.) Then tonight, my son flew into this HORRIFIC tantrum, even going so far as to hang up on my dad who I called in for reinforcement when he became so out of control. He was screaming and crying and just generally wild. All because I told him to take a shower. When my father sat him down to talk, my sons explanation of his actions was to break down and sob over how he isn't okay with me and their father being together. My question now is this.... The kids father seriously hates me. I'm not sure why. I bowed out and took absolutely nothing but mine and the kids clothes. He wanted the divorce and I gave it to him without fighting him over it. But he can not stand me. He is constantly trying to threaten me with him taking the kids, telling me the kids deserve better than, and how I use them against him. However, whenever he is in town, I hand the kids over. I make them call him twice a week (I was making them call every night until he didn't return them from their visit with him this summer, and wouldn't or me speak to them while they were with him). I even ensure they see the family he has living here in Delaware. So, I just don't know what to do... Should I attempt to tell his father about his behavior and let him know how much my son is struggling with this? Or is that going to make me look like I am just "using the kids". He has never been all that good about talking to them. But, this is becoming real issue. What should I do here? Thanks!