Ever had friends who do nothing but compete with you?

I have friends like that , we share the same birthday and it seems we like the same thing , I cant stand her , she is always trying to prove she is better than I am . I would also start to beat her at her own game , I color my hair and she said she dont want to bleach her hair , one month later she did and I just pretend I didnt even notice , she never receive a compliment from me . She then point it out to me " dont you see my hair " I said " I didnt even notice it, when did all that happen" ... She would even try to say I am immature because of the bag pack I wore , and she wore a one strap bag and that makes her more mature . If I happen to get better test score she would just go to the teacher to look over her paper , if we score the time that is fine with her but I should never get more than her . I could go on and on right now about all she did but ill leave it at that . She just cant stand being happy for anyone else , she always have problem .

It is just their pride getting in the way. If they are your real friends they will hopefully realize and care that you are doing well. If they are not happy for you, this is a different submject and they are not being a true friend. I've not had many friends like this but I see it often in the world. Even in family this will happen too but I do hope they care just as much for your sucess as their own.

One of the friends who I have known since I was at school is a little bit like this, and I have to say that he can get incredibly annoying at times. When you tell him something that you're proud of about your life, the only thing that he will ever say back is that he has done something that is even better than the thing that you're proud of. I think that this is very wrong, because you should always allow your friends to tell you about the things that they're proud of, and you should at least make some kind of effort to support them.

Some people are just rather highly competitive, and really it is just the type of people that I don't personally want to be around. I also don't want anyone to change to fit my standards. Yet, I just wonder about some people, where every little thing in their lives has to be a competition. Where they are trying to be the top of the heap no matter what. Regardless, I have known far more people like that than I would care to remember. It is a frustrating existence to live. Eventually, they are going to really just step all over every little bit of your life. Sometimes, you just got to just do things lightly, and do not let the competition get the better of you. Sometimes it is not a happy life to try and be overly competitive.

I remember my husband telling me that Michael Jordan would not be that great if not the help of his team mates including Scottie Pippen. Sorry for the introduction that this is a basketball thing. But I guess that's what I think that best portrays this discussion. Michael's teammates did not compete with him, they allowed Mike to play his game, supported him to get several championships. I have a friend who happens to be my office mate now, that she is always ask for additional work everytime I ask for additionals to my boss. As if she copies every move I make and the worse, she does not share the "blessings" I believe she is not worthy to be called a "friend", right? But the "benefit of the doubt" stays, maybe she is like that since we became friends. I would still continue working hard for that promotion though. Thanks

I don't know what to call them but definitely not in my definition of what a friend is. For me, a friend will be happy for you when you're doing well, will even share your excitement when you have something new and great going on and will even want to share it with you, but never to out-best you or to outshine you in any way. I almost have a friend like that, but good thing for me (bad for her) that her cousin couldn't keep her mouth shut so she spilled everything to me. I couldn't believe it at first but when she showed me their conversation (which I didn't insist on seeing, she just showed me), I finally believed that she's out to make sure she stays ahead of me. Actually I'm not really friends with her to begin with, my husband and I are friends with her husband. And being the wife we just thought it would be nice to befriend her as well. My husband instantly dislike her but he's still civil and polite whenever she's around but of course being a girl, I did my best to be friend's with her because I only have a few. So when we all took a vacation in her hometown, she saw my stuff. Then her husband told my husband she began asking him to give her an iPad, a dslr, a designer bag, this thing, that thing, until her husband noticed that all of these are stuff that I already have. He even joked that I should stay away from her so she wouldn't start having any more ideas. I told him that not all of these are from my husband, some of these I bought way before we're married out of my own salary. I just let it pass but I drew the line when she started some talk about my stuff. Some silly talk on how I was on debt or something just to buy these, when in fact I have a very clean cc bill. And she's the one being stalked by collection agents for unpaid bills. And in her attempt to compete, she was scammed for 10 thousand pesos because she tried to buy an iPhone from an online seller. Sadly I have to say good bye to that toxic "friendship".

I have been with competitive friends.I can say that she is a competitive person because she always wants to be on top and she had that pressure from her parents to shine.Maybe she doesn't really have the intention to compete against me but people were always comparing both of us because we are best friends and shares a lot of similarities.I don't really want to compete against her and just be what I am.She is on top and I want her to be on top,it's just people who loves to compare and that ruined are friendship.

Hi sharkfin, your post was very informative and you should really asked yourself those exsct questions you posted about and I am sure you will come up with the defenitive solutions. You need to get yourself some real friends and not people who are jealeous and give of those competitive vibes...

Hi sharksfin,friends can be divided into several types,maybe she is not a intimate of friend but she can make you competive and jealousy.This kind of friend can give us help on job and study with this compition we will work harder, but not on little things.

Yeah those kind of, like they only want how to get ahead of you while you don't give any importance to this. Make you feel less or trying to get ahead of you if they see something good because except for those things they cannot see anything in you. I think the problem is not being able to connect as fellows beings, having expectations that are set by the norms, society whatever. Not wanting to see what one is really for but what one should be like.