He's pushing my patience to its limit

I am very sorry to hear this. Long distance relationships can be really hard. You don't have the luxury of physical contact and presence. Making time for one another could be very challenging because one wouldn't be obliged to prioritize something that is not there. It really is a test of patience and trust. Unlike other relationships, LDRs only have communication to work their relationships out. So if that part is not working, then you must be bothered. You must talk to him about this but try not to jump into conclusions.

I do not know about guys, there are those who do call and if they are not busy. men should be able to find ways to give their girl's request. i always believe that no matter what, he should be able to at least call and let you know personally what's up with him. My man prefers to call me if i am not responding to his messages. he should be able to know... but ours is different from yours as we are not in a long distance relationship. i believe though that you should be able to find time and tell him about your concerns and he should understand. Do not be bothered yet, you ought to be able to trust him, of course.

Deargaiza, I empathize with your situation. I have been dealing with a long distance relationship for the past 7 years. First of all, I can say that it is not easy at all, and it is very heart wrenching at times. I do not think that you are asking to much for your boyfriend to find the time to call you. This seems fair, but sometimes I do think guys prefer other modes of communication. My boyfriend has gotten to the point that he prefers texting. Well, texting may not be you preferred mode of communication. I understand the desire to really talk things out and have a heart to heart conversation. Texting is still a form of communication. It just depends upon the text messages that he is sending. If he is saying in the texts, that he is too busy to talk when you try to call him. I totally understand your frustration with the situation. My boyfriend right now is acting like a complete jerk, so I really understand you saying that your patience has been pushed to the limit. He will only send me a text to ask questions that further push my buttons and make me cry. Even the other day, I called do not really recall what I was thinking. I had a moment of weakness where I just needing to talk to him and for him to care. Well, I called of course he did not answer. Big surprise seeing as he never answers his phone. As I am in the car leaving to run errand, I start to hear the little dinging sound on my phone saying that I have text messages. When I got to where I was headed, and had a moment to check my cell phone. I noticed that he had text asking why I had called. Part of me almost wanted to say if you wanted to know why I was calling you could have answered the phone. Trying to stem the fighting.. I just said, that I had called to see how he was doing. He said. like normal he was having a bad day. I told him that I was sorry. Later I noticed he text asking if he is going to have to pay money for his cell phone next month. Yes, that is what he all concerned about right now. The fact that after nearly 12 months of me paying my portion and his of the cell phone that since I am going through a really rough patch that I asked him to help with paying the phone bill. What a mistake. That only lead to him being so mean, accusing, and acting even worse t. I han the jerk that he had previously been. Then, the question was do you have a job yet because he figures if I do probably he can get out of having to pay his part of the cell phone bill next month. The contract expires at the end of December. Thank goodness. It is not soon enough. He could not even ask me how I was doing. When I stated this fact, he said well you told me to be nice. He claims that if he asks me how I am doing that he will not be nice. The only thing I could say friend is to try to evaluate what is happening with your long distance relationship, and decide if you are willing to play the games. If he is breaking guidelines that you both agreed upon to find time to communicate. This could be a red flag, but you may want to give him the benefit of the doubt and re-clarify that when you say communicate your mean a phone call not text messaging. Then after you clarify if he still does, the same thing I think you have your answer. The rest is up to you to evaluate what will be your next move to continue to find understanding and patience with a long distance relationship that is not meeting your needs or to walk away from it. In my situation, I have already come to the conclusion that I cannot do this anymore. The new year is going to be a clean break. I am done. 9 years and my patience is gone. Things are not getting better they just continue to get worse. As, I said you have to think about what you want. Evaluate the situation for yourself, and make your own decision of what will make you happy. I can just say it is not good to be in a relationship that makes you miserable. No matter how much you care about the other person.

I know that our initial reaction for an unanswered call or message could frustrate us. But knowing that your partner is doing something important and could not make a call right away, then you should understand. Guys get irritated, too if we keep on bugging them or demanding certain things from them. Just try to understand him and give him support with his job. He would greatly appreciate it.

Men think different as women. You did not ask or request him to call you no matter if he can or not. You said: call me if you can! To men this is something completely different. You gave him the free choice to call or let it be. So why do you complain afterwards he is not interested in you? If you want him to call you or text you, you have to say: call me today or text me. And yes it is normal to men not to think about their gf's or wifes whole day on. What might be important to you, or might be a sign of love in your eyes is not seen to them in the same way. BTW the fact he doesn't call of text you, doesn't mean he is not interested in you or doesn't love you.

Hi friend, sad to hear about this. I wonder why your man don't give importance to you? Really he is a different guy. Most of the guys always gives importance to their beloved person and give proper reply to them. May be he is very much busy with his job. Don't worry, surely he will call you soon and wait for it

hi, that was really so annoying and really end your patience,and being in a long distance relationship is really hard,they always reason is they are busy to their work or something,but of course a questionable for us because they can send text message.

For me as a woman, I would really think something bad because he can't call me but can send me text messages. I feel you my friend. I know how it feels like when your special someone can't able to do our small requests. We then think of questions running in our mind. It would have been understandable if your boyfriend will tell you the reason why he couldn't call you at least. So that your mind would be in peace. Anyway, that will put your trust you have for him to test. It is part of being in a relationship. I have been through a lot of things and I tell you it is not easy. You have to be strong. A relationship needs each other in order to work out. I hope your boyfriend and you will settle it out.

Thanks a ton for sharing this discussion. Well i can understand your situation very well and it is pretty normal to be worried about your partner when you guys are in a distant relationship. I know u must be getting worried and tensed not to see him responding u properly but may be he is stuck in lots of work that he is finding it difficult to reply u back. Just have patience, give him ample time and if do not reply back then, then u can keep your priorities straight and sort out the problem with him. What say?

Well as long as he's still texting you at least he's still staying in touch with you! Sometimes we get busy and really can't talk,but at least he texts you! Long distance relationships can be hard at times. I remember when I was in a long distance relationship. There was one time, I was seeing this guy and he said he was coming down to see me. I kept texting or calling him to see where he was, only out of politeness. It ended up he broke it off because he thought I was being too "needy." I told him that when I person says they're going to do something I expect them to do it or at least tell me that you're going to be late. I waited around for him, but he wasn't polite enough to tell me he had made other plans. So sometimes as woman we expect some one to be as respectful to us as we would be for them.

Yes maybe that is just a test for your patience. Give him more time to prove his love to you after all calling you in mobile or phone is not a bases that he really loves you ,so many ways to express your love to somebody , that is why for now just be patient , one day you'll be shock on how he expresses his love to you.

hi ! thanks for sharing your views. Its your private life, but decided to share your feelings with Mylotters. well I honestly feel that long distance relationships do not work. you guys must really be in love. Well I'm a guy and I would say that, If we do not respond it does not mean that we do not love our girl. love is always there. and we guys are not good in managing love and work at same time. If some thing irritates us, We loose ability to enjoy beautiful things of life. i think you must speak to him about this and get clarification .. all the best.