My boyfriend's ex kept on calling him.
By chicgale
@chicgale (2982)
Philippines
November 12, 2012 5:36pm CST
My boyfriend's ex girlfriend kept on calling him. He got irritated but he didn't tell her to stop calling him coz he just wanted to be a gentleman. He told me that their friend told him that she still have feelings for him. I am afraid that he will go back to him, but he told me that he don't have feelings for her anymore. He said, if ever our relationship won't work, he will never still gonna go back with her coz he knew about her attitude already and he will just prefer to find another one. Do you think when a man says "No, I don't want her anymore" is true? OMG, I think I am paranoid.. :-(
3 people like this
18 responses
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
He was honest enough to tell you that she has been calling him. So maybe he was telling the truth of not wanting her back in his life. I know that even if we have been re-assured about our partner's love, but when a third party is involved, it becomes a different story. If I were in your place, I will call the girl and tell her to quit calling coz she is wasting her time.
2 people like this
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
Well, I think he still needs to put closure on this silly fantasy of her ex. He needs to tell her to stop calling him as it doesn't look good that way. Besides, it is making you uncomfortable. That is how I think your boyfriend must do to end those unwanted calls.
1 person likes this
@chicgale (2982)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
I don't wanna call the girl coz my bf don't want me to get involve. When he sleeps over at my house, she called him a lot of times and he didn't wanna pick up the phone. But he is just too nice. He said he will never gonna go back to her as a love, but he just want to be friends with her coz he is friends with his other ex.
1 person likes this
@lizlee (208)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
Hi there! I think the mere fact that your boyfriend told you about his ex still calling him proves that he really mean what he said to you. That he don't want her anymore. You're lucky with your guy. I mean most guys won't tell their current girlfriends about their ex's and how their ex's keep calling them.
Believe him, he has given you his assurance :)
The best of luck to the both of you. Cheers!!! :)
2 people like this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
I think you do have a basis when you are feeling like that. the fact that he is unable to gtell her straight that he does not want her to call him is a sign i saw in my ex too before that he is unable to talk harshly in front o fme and i learned that he appeases her behind my back only saying he does not want me to be angry etc...
2 people like this
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
Hi chicgale, i know how you feel and it's natural. I think you should trust him especially if he's faithful to you but still need some extra precautions. When my husband and I were dating his ex girlfriend always calling and text him but my husband never entertained her. I am glad that after a few months she stop calling him and i think she got tired too. Hope your boyfriend's ex will stop bothering you and your boyfriend too so that you have a peace of mind.
2 people like this
@missjahn (4574)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
do not be afraid of things. in a relationship, trust is needed to keep it more stronger than ever. have faith in what he'd say to you. just let him feel that you care for him and you understand him the most. enjoy in his company and that if something bad will happened to your relationship, you will not going to regret anything for at least you give the best you have within you and not your lost but his. but for now, do not give yourself too much worries, just do your part and love him as you love yourself. :) so thanks for this discussion :)
2 people like this
@passion4fassion (996)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
oh i know what you feel that's exactly what i feel my boyfriend ex keep annoying me and my boyfriend but i believe my boyfriend that he wont go back with her. your not paranoid we always feel fear but we should know how to manage and just put a trust on him that's how your relation will be more stronger
@shaggin (72141)
• United States
13 Nov 12
Trust is so important in a relationship. You need to trust him if you are going to be with him or it will ruin the relationship. If he says he doesnt want her then you have to just believe him. Hopefully he will eventually tell her to leave him alone.
1 person likes this
@wilsongoddard (7291)
• United States
20 Nov 12
He should not be taking calls from her. He is in a relationship with you. Out of respect to you, he should not be taking these calls.
They don't have a child together, so there is no legitimate reason for them to continue to have ongoing communications. Taking these calls is not a matter of being a gentleman.
1 person likes this
@beamer88 (4259)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
Mariaperalta is right. You should ask your boyfriend to tell her ex not to call him anymore. He's actually being a gentleman in doing so. Not telling his ex not to call is not a gentlemanly act. He's not being straightforward and honest to his ex. I don't think that's what we consider a gentleman. You're not paranoid, just concerned, and that's really very normal in any relationship 
2 people like this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
hi chic,
I think its natural to get paranoid cause you love your guy well I think you should tell your boyfriend to change numbers or maybe you both two can talk to the ex that she should not do such things. Just trust him cause that is important one besides he already told you what he felt about it.
happy mylotting
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
13 Nov 12
If he has always been faithful to you than try to trust him. =) If not, I cannot blame you for being worried at all.
Even if he has been faithful to you if it bothers you as it would me too, I would talk to him and tell him to tell her to stop calling. If he is firm about it she might just stop!
2 people like this
@olliekobra1 (1825)
•
14 Nov 12
i suppose its hard for your fella because he does want to be a gentleman and doesnt want to hurt his ex so he doesnt have the heart to tell her to leave you both alone. But this doesnt mean that he wants her back and even has any real feelings for her and i believe that it can be true when he says he doesnt really want her back.
1 person likes this
@CosmoOwl12 (411)
• United States
14 Nov 12
I don't think you're paranoid, but if your boyfriend loves you and has no feelings for his ex like he says, then you should ask him to block her number or tell her to stop contacting him. If he says no, then you have even more reason to be paranoid because if he will not keep her from contacting him then he obviously wants to talk to her. I hope that your boyfriend is telling the truth and he really doesn't want to be with her.
1 person likes this
@CosmoOwl12 (411)
• United States
20 Nov 12
Oh I see. All I need to do to block a number is go onto the cell phone company's site and login to my account there. Then I go to "blocking calls and texts" and enter the number. Or I can go to the cell phone store and have them block the number for me.
I certainly hope your boyfriend is not doing anything wrong, but a woman's intuition is usually always right.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
13 Nov 12
I think yes- once the guy said NO- it means NO.
Unlike with girls- when they say NO- their heart still aches for a YES.
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
13 Nov 12
I think he should ask her nicely not to call him anymore. If he really cares and loves you.. he needs to do that. As it clearly bothers you. Have a talk with him about it.
@friendineed (6)
•
13 Nov 12
Sorry to say. But you are absolutely wrong. Your boy friend doe's not want to be a gentleman. But wants to be over smart. It shows, may be knowingly or unnowingly, he still has some soft corner with her. He still likes her, of course may be he also don't recognise this fact. It is better to make him completly distant from her. It is better for your relationship with your boy friend.
1 person likes this
