Fading Away

It can't hurt to send an email once a week or so for awhile. Have you searched their names on news sites or in their local newspapers online? Sometimes friends just fade away and it is sad when one side is not done with the relationship. I hope that's not the case with your friends. I also hope they are doing well.

One or two more tries can't hurt. On the other hand, they know how to get hold of you. Perhaps when life gets a bit less crazy they will get back in touch.

You sparked me to go and check how long I've been here...I've been here six years! I think friendships are similar to the ocean. I have spells where I haven't heard from someone, then they come swinging by. A couple of our 'gang' a few years back are still here, some active, some not. Some have even changed their identity here. I have two that I've grown close to over the years, enough to have even shared my real identity by exchanging on Facebook. I went through a very down time in my life-I had a relapse with my MS in 08 (and lost my internet a number of times), along with a host of medical issues. In 09, I lost my father and moved. In 10, I moved twice, and started moving away from myLot (though never long enough to forfeit earnings) more. I've moved AGAIN this year, quit multiple jobs (turned out to not be what I thought they'd be), but have yet to turn away from myLot for any real length of time. I sometimes go incognito if things aren't going well-let's just say that the majority of my face-to-face friends have turned out to be less than stellar listeners. And being a Scorpio, I often take it to heart. But some diehards keep at it because they understand it's only temporary. I think your friends aren't sure that you're ok again. It could be that they've both suffered a terrible time. I'd keep up those little notes to them-it might be the bright spot in their day, but they might not yet be strong enough to write back.

What's that stupid email that is constantly being forwarded about people coming into your life for a reason, a season, or whatever the other thing is? Perhaps the season is over.

I kind of know the feeling. I have been in similar situations a few times in 'real life' where you feel like you are pushing the friendship by keeping in contact. You find out who your real friends are when you seem to be the only one making contact. That is how I feel on the matter anyway. This was very clear to me when I moved away from the area that I grew up in. While I could chat on the phone and have great conversations with some friends when I rang them after we moved, there were only one or two that would regularly ring me as well. All others ended up being one sided with me calling, so I just gave up in the end. Some of those I am still in contact with these days every six months or year or so just to keep up to speed with what is going on, but the regular contact is long gone. We have moved on, which is what happens. Like you say, friends come and go.

I think that you should continue trying to contact them. After all I think friendships can last a lifetime. Just keep trying. We all tend to get overwhelmed with our life perhaps there is a lot going on in there's right now.

That is a difficult question. I only have that experience with one person. I tried really hard to keep in touch/get back in touch with him with no success. I eventually concluded that he was not interested in keeping in touch although I did wonder whether it was worth pursuing. Does it make us a better friend if we keep trying? Maybe they need such a good friend? Or maybe they really are just fed up with us. It is difficult to know. Maybe you could make one more attempt with them and see what happens.

hi dear P1ke, sorry to hear that your contact to your friends has been infrequent. You are right, sometimes the friendships we make just fade away with time passing but I hope this is not the case with your friends. You say you even sent them mails and they havent answered yet. Maybe they are busy this time of the year (I also spent the two weeks off with not only clearing out online a bit but starting to wrap presents now I should start writing the mail.....)

Thanks a ton for sharing this discussion. Well i can understand your situation and i know the fact that this is life and many people will come and go and we have to keep them intact so that with passage of time we do not leave their touch and contact. Now since u are back u have to make all efforts to know about them and their whereabouts and rekindle the old relationship that u had with them and so that u can renew the bond and relationship with them. Go ahead! What say?

Hi friend, good to hear that you had phone and skype contact with mylot friends. Day by day a lot of persons joining here and some of them are leaving from this site, it is really hard to see an active person for a long time here, don't worry about the missing friends and find new friends to compensate the loss

maybe they have faded. why take the closed doors when you have a lot of openned doors just infront of you. Let them go, they are not responding because they are busy or dont like to be in contact anymore. So take it easy. You may also ask people you know in common about them. if there is no one. it is not work pursuing. you still have lots of friends aside from them for sure.

Sometimes just happens... friends lose their interest or maybe they become too busy with something else. It is hard to mantain friendships with people who were your class mates, your neighbours, or even your best friends sice childhood. I don't say it is necesarly your case, but you have to be prepared if you'll see they give no sign of life.