Would you marry a man shorter than you?
By mizzty82
@mizzty82 (40)
United States
December 4, 2012 11:01am CST
On average, women seek men who are physically stronger and taller than them. I always questioned if this was because we tend to look for men like our fathers. When we think back to when we were little girls Daddy looked huge in our eyes and he was our protector. We felt so safe in his arms. So is this why we tend to seek tall men as mates? My fiance is slightly shorter(He's 5'6 1/2, I'm 5'8) and I used to be very self-conscious about it. I felt it was very shallow of me but I worried about how we'd be perceived from outsiders and if I would be less physically attracted to him in the long run because he would appear less masculine. I've come to mature a lot since then and I love my man a lot. I still tend to avoid wearing high heels sometimes when we go out, but, overall, I feel much better about it. On the other hand, I still get comments that I'm too tall for my man.
Any opinions? Do you think this is superficial or should height be a criteria for marraige?
4 people like this
14 responses
@angelkarah050182 (4980)
• Philippines
4 Dec 12
Oh, height is not a criteria of marriage but for some women when you ask them of their ideal man they usually answer "tall, dark and handsome." Ooops, I don't know if only here in my country but we usually like taller men. My husband is 5'9" and I'm 5'2." Our heights are really far. I look so short when I'm with him. I guess height doesn't matter if you really love the person. Don't wear heels so that his height won't be emphasized. Don't mind what other people say. Thanks for sharing and happy mylotting.
@angelkarah050182 (4980)
• Philippines
5 Dec 12
Yes, he's overprotective. LOL. I guess being overprotective doesn't have something to do with the height. It has something to do with their attitude. Oh, I hope you can wear heels on your wedding day. Some people though still wear high heels even their partners are kinda short. They don't care about their height differences. It's my pleasure to respond here. Are you getting married? I wish both of you happiness in life. :)
@mizzty82 (40)
• United States
4 Dec 12
Wow...that's definitely a big height difference but it's to your advantage because I'm sure he feels very protective of you. At least you can wear heels so it's less noticeable. I'd really love to wear heels on our wedding day but i suppose i'll stick to a kitten heel if possible. I know he's a little self-conscious about so im sensitive about it but, overall, he knows he's a great catch and he doesnt let it consume him. Thanks for your feedback!!!!
@allyoftherain (7208)
• United States
4 Dec 12
Personally, I've never been attracted to a man shorter than me. I very much like the idea of having a tall, strong man being my protector, but when I stop to think about it... it's really not that important to me. If a shorter man has what I consider the more important qualities in a mate, like honesty, integrity, loyalty, etc. and so forth, then it doesn't matter what his height is.
I think it's kind of superficial, but I also think that superficial things are a little important. 
Let me explain myself, I don't think you should marry someone you find completely physically unattractive for one reason or another because you have to live with that person the rest of your life. If you don't find anything about them physically attractive, that could be miserable. But if you do like things about their appearance, like the color of their eyes, their height, their build, then it just adds to whatever you find attractive about their character.
Let me explain myself, I don't think you should marry someone you find completely physically unattractive for one reason or another because you have to live with that person the rest of your life. If you don't find anything about them physically attractive, that could be miserable. But if you do like things about their appearance, like the color of their eyes, their height, their build, then it just adds to whatever you find attractive about their character.@allyoftherain (7208)
• United States
5 Dec 12
I also think that when some people who aren't initially physically attracted to each other get to know each other and discover an emotional attraction, they might also develop a physical attraction. Like, traits they didn't care about or think of before that they see in their partner they might suddenly find endearing. Or maybe not so suddenly... it's different for everyone and every relationship.
If you've met the man of your dreams and he happens to be shorter than you, then forget the nay-sayers. 
@mizzty82 (40)
• United States
4 Dec 12
I definitely know what you mean. Even though everyone tries to say that superficial things like looks, height etc. don't matter, they can impact how physically attracted you are to your partner.Although physical attraction isn't everything, it is a big component in maintaining a healthy relationship. I've always liked the idea of a tall, strong man too. But, like I always say, love comes in unexpected places.
1 person likes this
@watchamacallitz (1171)
• Philippines
4 Dec 12
I only stand at 5'1 and one of the main qualities I look for in a man is that h e should be taller than me! and thank god, my partner is! And, I can say that i can never fall for someone shorter than me, much more marry one!
Am i being so bully here? 
Am i being so bully here? @mizzty82 (40)
• United States
4 Dec 12
You are definitely not alone. Most women would never date a guy shorter than them. I used to be the same way (secretly I still am) but it's so difficult when literally my guy is my best friend. You're lucky. If i was 5'1 I wouldn't have this problem!!!!! lol
@Shavkat (140097)
• Philippines
7 Dec 12
If you love someone, it doesn't need to have a set of standard for not marrying a person who is shorter tan you. If you do consider the physical attributes, then you should not be involve with that person in the first place. It will definitely unfair in his part.
@betty1989 (751)
• China
4 Dec 12
height should not be a criteria for marriage if you really love your boyfriend. As you said, you prefer to sacrify yourself like do not wear high heels when your are out with him. Maybe you cannot bear people gossip about you and your boyfriend. Anyway, if you really love him, you can ignore this. My ideal boyfriend is also strong and tall. It can give me a sense of safety. Good luck for you and your boyfriend.
@anklesmash (1412)
•
4 Dec 12
Im a lad and today I was having a very similar chat with the lads that I live in.But our discussion was basically whether we would go out with a girl who was taller than them.Most of them said that they wouldnt want a girlfriend taller than them especially if it was by a significant amount.I was one of the few people that wouldnt mind having a taller girlfriend actually i may have been the only one. Personally i don't really have a preference over a girls height it wouldnt really have an affect over whether or not I went out with a girl.If i really liked a girl i wouldnt care about her height.Though it probably wont be an issue as i am at least average height and girls on average tend to be short than guys.
@ybarradotcom (84)
• Philippines
5 Dec 12
Actually, not at all. Since to marry is for love and for any reason, like height. Its just that, its not the two persons married are the only persons in the world. There will always be the times people criticize the marriage happen ..
@choybel (5042)
• Philippines
4 Dec 12
I believe everybody has their own personal preferences regarding the person they choose to marry or be in a relationship with. Physical appearance is not everything although I must admit though that to many it is the first thing and probably the priority, but in choosing the person to spend your entire life with, that would probably not matter at all. I am a tall guy and my girlfriend is of normal height in our country but our height gap is somewhat big, but it has never bothered me once.
@youless (112562)
• Guangzhou, China
5 Dec 12
In fact sometimes the age, height etc. does matter to a relationship. But as long as you love your man very much, it will be OK. As to me, I would mind if my man who is shorter than me. As I hoped to find a taller man and it seemed that he could protect me well. I like the feeling to be taken good care of.
@silverfox09 (4708)
• United States
4 Dec 12
Its true what you say , men normally go for shorter woman and woman for taller men . I dont think it should matter when you love the person , you dont have to care what others think . My fiance is only 3 inches taller than me and when I wear heels we on the same height but we love that we are like that , I think its perfect because we are so similar in body type .
My 16 year old brother is taller than both of us , he is 5'11 . My aunt is 5'11 and she feel self conscious as you , because she want a person taller than her so she never wear heels . I think its normal to feel that way because of how we are raise but if you love your guy marry him and dont care and I dont think only 2 inches is much difference any ways . Height should not be a criteria for a marriage .
, he is 5'11 . My aunt is 5'11 and she feel self conscious as you , because she want a person taller than her so she never wear heels . I think its normal to feel that way because of how we are raise but if you love your guy marry him and dont care and I dont think only 2 inches is much difference any ways . Height should not be a criteria for a marriage . 
@jswindell10 (417)
• United States
5 Dec 12
Marriage is pretty serious and should be built on a foundation that can withstand naysayers. In fact, they shouldn't even be a factor in a serious relationship.
As far as I go, I'm almost 5'9 and live in a community with a strong Hispanic/Latino population. I've only met one over 6 feet tall and he was my co-worker.
I think what you may be getting at is the short man stereotype (a.k.a. Napoleon complex, George Jefferson type).
My ex is slightly shorter than me and yes, the stereotype did apply to him. He was super-insecure, bossy and took joy in poking fun at others. However, I've dated guys over 6 feet with less-than-endearing qualities about them also.
So when it comes to marriage and someone shorter than me, I hope that height is only a physical trait and not a mental defense against the world.
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
4 Dec 12
My husband is a little shorter than I am and it doesn't bother me at all. It never did though. I also never looked at my father like a protector though, he was more of an enemy to me when I was a kid. Maybe that's why it doesn't bother me with my husband being shorter. He might be short but he is strong! He could take on people twice his size and be fine so I know he can definitely keep me safe and protect me.
I think its a little silly for others to judge based on height. To me, that is of no importance. I do know people do look at others funny when the woman is taller than the man though. I just don't know why, especially todays day and age there are far more weird things in relationships than height. Lol!
@somupriti (353)
•
4 Dec 12
I think you need to think lot with your heart not with your mind. The latter is very confusing in nature where as the former is very stable to that respect because it deal every thing with sentiment not by calculation.
@farid_lmu (70)
• Bangladesh
5 Dec 12
first of all appreciate to express your feelings frankly. I know its embarrassing situation and it will not a fact if you truely love and respect your fiance. So no worry about that.
