Will you compare your BF or GF with your ex one?

I actually never think about what my exes did versus what my partner does though I know it is something many do think about. I guess I always treat the individual as an individual. What I think about in terms of my exes is myself. I think about how I behaved and what worked in the relationship and what didn't and try to apply it to the relationship I am currently in. I know each individual person is unique and so I can only control and change how I behave so that is what I focus on. I've learned a lot from my exes about universal issues including patience, respect, balance, compromise etc. So I use those experiences and apply them to my current situation but I don't tend to compare people because for me, it would be moot. I recognize each person as an individual and treat them as such. Happy New Year!

I sometimes do this from time to time because it is unavoidable at times. I try not to compare them too much though because they are both pretty different and I just see the good things about my current girlfriend and my ex. I am incredibly grateful for the girlfirend that I have and how she feels about me. She makes me feel really confident that she wants to be with me forever. We talk about having kids together and living together which is something my ex wasn't really active in. The way my current girlfriend treats me and loves me is a lot different than my ex and proves to me that she loves me a lot more than my ex ever did.

It is very unfair for your boyfriend if you would constantly be thinking of your ex everytime you are having a fight with him. Both of them have different personalities and that you should respect. We may have some indifference with other persons, but we must strive hard to fix the issue and not to include other people with the problem.

I am single now but when I still have a boyfriend, I can never really denied that sometimes comparing my current and my ex pops into my mind but it was not intended. It just pops out from no where even though I don't mean to think about that. I don't have a feelings for my ex before and I think it is just normal that you can compare them but it doesn't matter because you are now in a new relationship.

We cant stop ourselves to compare what we have before but, it will not help our present relatonship if we will still stick to what we have before, actually i'm suffering from this situation that, I have new girlfriend but I'm still looking forward for my ex, which is wrong, not just wrong but Really really really wrong, because you're already in a situation wherein you are already in relationship with another person, remember, each person has feelings, they might be hurt if you still looking for your ex, it's normal to miss our ex's, but it's a mistakes to compare them from what you have today, than before, so, forgot the past, focus on the present, and make the past as an experience, cos you can't continue your life, if you're still stuck in your past,

That is why people always say we just think of the past when we are not well now.To compare with your ex is quite normal I think,but you should realize if you alway think about the past,you can not let those memories behind,it is unfair to your current boyfriend.If you stay into his shoes,you will not how bad when your boyfriend know about it.So the right way is to have more communcation with your boyfriend and try to avoid some unnecessary quarrel.But a little arguing is good for your relationship.And do remember no one can be exactly the same as another in this world.It makes no sense to compare with the one who already became your ex.Good luck.

Well, 'Version 2.0' CANNOT EXIST without 'Version 1.0'; so I don't consciously compare my current girlfriend to my ex-girlfriend(s), but the past ones DO make up sort of a 'background' for the 'foreground' of my current relationship. But I would be careful to focus on how I reacted to the argument, lifting my reasoning out of the past situation & seeing how I can apply it to the current situation (i.e. most likely seeing 'how I put myself in her shoes' & seeing if I can use that method now). Remembering the ex gives you a chance for a wider perspective.

I don't feel like its a good idea to compare them because it can hurt the relationship your in now. It can make you miss the other person you were with, miss the way things were with them, etc... It's just not a good idea to do that all the time! Maybe sometimes it won't hurt anything but definitely not an all the time thing...

Unfortunately, I've done that. And it doesn't help the new relationship to grow. I've hurt the guy. I've learned my lesson. And I will never ever try to compare the past with the present anymore.

Nope, not ever. It is just not right for you to compare your present partner with your ex. How would you feel if your boyfriend do that to you? Insulted, right? Each person is different and he's an EX for a reason. If you keep comparing them, better yet, pick up the garbage (EX) that you have dumped away. Just saying. Have a great day

It shouldn't be that's the right one but it happens every now and then. It seems difficult also to avoid that kind of situation.However, comparing it face to face in an argument seems to be great insult for your current boyfriend. It's okay if you're just comparing it in your mind!

It is not ethical to compare your exs over your partner now. The love before will never be the same. They will get hurt if you do it.

It’s hard to compare your present relationship to your past relationship but if comparing means a positive way then it is good, such as comparing your past relationship such as bad personality over your present relationship which has a good personality, well that would be acceptable. However if you compare your partner from your ex and say something offensive about him about your present relationship and judging your past relationship comparing it from what you are experiencing, then that’s not a good idea.

I think that we always compare BF and BFF with others. It is human nature. There are certain characteristics that we look for in our friendships with others and a lot of times when we encounter something different our first response is to compare. As long as you are comparing and continuing to move on with your current relationship and not longing to return to the old relationship, you should still have a positive relationship with your new BF. Communication is the key to the success of any relationship and talking things over will be the best practice for handling those small disagreements.

I have had bfs too before my current one, I guess there are times I am able to compare them... what the other does in the same situation... but I do not purposely do that.. no way should i be doing that because I am with the new bf now and as respect for him, i intend to give him that and the benefit of not being compared with another person whom obviously is no better than him, because we have broken off already, in the first place, right? That's just unfair for him to be compared... I am sure you too would not want to be compared to anyone, It is just not appropriate. We have got to learn to appreciate the person we are with, they are different and they will never be the same so we should really not go into that.

I think this situation is just normal. At first you may compare them with what you have observe but I think not to the extent that you will verbally compare the two of them. if you will do this personally then your current will be hurt.

Many tend to do that, and it is so wrong. As no one person is the same. We can expect them to be the same. But thats really unfair. Take care there. See you here soon.

I think everebody compares now and then. As long as you realize that your bf is NOT your ex there's no harm in doing that. Your bf defenitely will handle things in another way. He will take your words in another way. So comparing is basically senseless. That's all you need to remember.

I think I was guilty of that too. Whenever i quarreled or had misunderstanding with him, I aslo think of my ex. I don't know why but I did compare them. I think it is because you see something good to your ex that you don't see to your bf now. Have a nice day!

If there are tow of same nature sometimes comparison is inevitable. For example, like me I am working in two schools at the same time, so I can't help but compare are policies, and people. Relationship is not excuse on this. There will always be a better one over the other or the worst one over the other.