I Hurt Him...

Valdosta, Georgia
January 29, 2013 9:29pm CST
I'm sure we have all hurt someone in the past but I apologized to someone today for hurting them years ago. He apparently had a major thing for me. I didn't know it at the time, just found out today actually. But I was so wrapped up in my own world and everything (immature due to being young) that I didn't know... Anyway I apologized for being so ignorant to this and for hurting him. I brought my husband(he was my boyfriend at the time) to college to meet this guy and all my other friends there too. Guess that added salt to the wound... I just felt it was the right thing to do even though I didn't realize I was hurting anyone. I hate being the reason for a heart break... He said he forgave me a long time ago but I'm glad I apologized anyway...
3 people like this
15 responses
• India
30 Jan 13
Hi friend, sad to know that you hurt him few years back, but he forget about that incident and forgive you for your fault, really it is a great thing, as you mentioned you felt sorry for your mistake, it shows that you realized your fault and don't repeat it again
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Jan 13
Yeah I didn't know I hurt him but I am glad I had the chance to apologize to him. Even if I didn't realize I had hurt him in any way. Now we can have a friendship again!
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
30 Jan 13
It would be awkward to talk about feelings with a guy you don't feel nothing then apologize but still you did apologize. But you did the right thing, it doesn't matter how long it was and whether you don't know it before. At least in this way you showed him you are a kind person and still can be his friend.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Jan 13
Yeah I think it was the right thing to do even if I didn't know I hurt him. I am glad I got the chance to apologize! =) And yes now we can have a friendship again.
• United States
30 Jan 13
It's good you had the chance to apoligize. Sometimes when we're younger we just don't realize how words or actions can inflict pain on people and hurt them so much. But, like you said, you were young and I'm sure just not thinking at that time.
• United States
30 Jan 13
Good grief Charlie Brown, I meant apologize, not apoligize..duh. Not enough coffee yet.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
Yeah I'm glad I got the chance to say sorry to him. Not only for hurting him but also for not knowing he liked me... Yeah I was young and at the time so focused on my boyfriend (My hubby now). I need some coffee too! :)
• Mexico
30 Jan 13
My cafe today... I have 4 coffees from all over the world. Love to have you here for a cup.... take care.
@vandana7 (99920)
• India
30 Jan 13
I am a nasty one, real demon...at times I hate myself. So long ago, this colleague of mine who is married to a drunkard ...asks me to write whatever nest egg I have to her only child...starting with words "SINCE YOU DONT HAVE CHILDREN". After about 50 odd times, whatever was brewing in my mind became so black and ugly that on the 51st time that she asked, I told her, I would have had her child been good looking enough. The instant I uttered it, I knew I had shattered her..but the words cant be retraced. And I am so afraid to apologize lest she takes liberties to resume from where she left.
@vandana7 (99920)
• India
31 Jan 13
No...but out here, people start interpreting apologies to their advantage... I mean, if I apologize for that statement...it would imply I realize my mistake, and my mistake in their mind is not that I hurt them, but my unwillingness to take on the responsibility and part with my retirement nest egg...so they will start tormenting me once more...give that nest egg to my daughter...SINCE YOU DONT HAVE ANY CHILDREN. As if that is justified...lol It does feel below belt when you hurt somebody who is not as educated as you are, or at a disadvantage when compared to you all. But they too do not have right to constantly hurt me with SINCE YOU DONT HAVE ANY CHILDREN, right...either by their words, or their actions. I am absolutely fine with using such words with people who are well off and are trying to ridicule me for my predicament.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
I don't think your that mean vandana and it is never too late to apologize for being hurtful. I apologized 8 years later but he still appreciated the apology and it needed to be said...
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
30 Jan 13
We were all young once. I had my feelings hurt enough to know and learn. I did grow a thick skin. And especially after my marriage broke up, I now trust next to no one. But it is a nice thing you did. Even though he did forgive you years ago. I am sure it brought closure to him for that time in his life. It happens, now move on and don't worry.
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
31 Jan 13
It really is true what they say you know, "hind sight is 20/20." Think about that. We all look back and thing, wow, how did that happen or I should have done this or that differently. But remember, at the time we didn't think as we do now.
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Jan 13
Yeah, I was an pretty selfish back then I think. But now I am a totally different person and I am glad that I am. I am glad I got the chance to apologize it got a friendship restored and I feel better knowing that he forgave me.
1 person likes this
@CarraC (69)
• Canada
30 Jan 13
I'm sure you feel at ease now that you apologized and he accepted. Well, like you said you didn't know he had a thing for you. It's actually his fault that you hurt him innocently, he should have told you this when he had the chance. But I guess he would rather be hurt now than back then. Easier to accept it now.
1 person likes this
• Valdosta, Georgia
31 Jan 13
Yeah I do feel better now that I said sorry. I know I didn't know but I'm glad I got the chance to apologize anyway. I hate hurting anyone, I do my best to not hurt people...
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
30 Jan 13
Hi LovingMyBabies that was really sweet of you and I am sure back in high school and college many of us might have been in the same spot.We did not always know if someone had a crush on us nor did they know if I had a crush on someone. But it takes a special person to really apologize after all this time.I am glad you got the chance to apologize as it did make you feel better.
• Valdosta, Georgia
1 Feb 13
Yes I am sure many people were different back then... I am glad I got to apologize to him even after so many years! It rekindled a friendship again which was nice too. =)
@Archie0 (5653)
30 Jan 13
I am happy that you still took the chance of going after so many years and apologizing to him. I am sure he must be feeling good that at least his feelings were respected and also he came to know that you did not do it purposely. We always tend to apologize and then it is too late to do that. After some years we think it is too late and still we don't walk up to say sorry even when we have that chance. Good you did it. You have a heart of gem LMB :) happy to be your friend.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
I'm glad too. I felt horrible that I hurt him. But I'm so glad I said sorry and he forgave me... Aw thank you Archie! I try to be a good person and do the right things in life. :)
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
31 Jan 13
I did the same thing to someone last year. I got a friend request from somebody I didn't know (she got married so she changed her last name). When I finally realize who it was, I accepted her FR and we got to talking. She then reminded me how rude I was when we were teens. That I broke her heart then. I did apologize to her, and we've become FB friends since.
• India
30 Jan 13
Thanks for this discussion friend. You have done the right thing by apologizing, it works as a wonderful healer too.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
Thank you. I hate hurting people so I'm glad I got the chance to tell him I was sorry.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
30 Jan 13
Some people would not even bother getting back to the person and apologize. I mean, it has been years ago, and maybe it doesn't matter anymore. But if I were put in the same situation, would have just done the same. I think you did great.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
It was 8 years ago. So yes a long time. But once he told me he liked me all those years ago I felt terrible. I knew I had to say sorry to him and I was glad that he forgave me.
• China
30 Jan 13
That is cool for boys,and due to you had apologized to him,so he will forgive you definitely,you know what?Unless you are a tall and handsome and rich boy,otherwise you will be rejected by so many girls untill you find your true love,so that is fine,he not only be hurted by you but also be hurted by other hot girls,and you are doing great at least you had make your apology. And from the boy's point of view,we are cool for this kind of things totally.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
Yeah I'm just glad I could apologize to him and he forgave me. Now we can have a friendship again and move forward with our lives...
• Greece
30 Jan 13
We all look back on things that we wish we had not done or said, but you at least got the chance to undo this particular hurt. Even if you were a little unkind then, although unintentionally, you have matured into a caring and mature adult. The other nice thing about your discussion is that the boy forgave you, he is a nice person too and it must have been a relief for you to know that his hurt was a short one and he did not carry resentment towards you because of it.
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
Yeah that's one thing I'm glad of, that I got the chance to apologize to him. Even though I didn't know I hurt him, I still wanted to say I was sorry because I hate being the reason for anyone's pain. Thank you, I have grown up a lot since then and I try to be careful of other people's feelings always. I'm so glad he forgave me. :)
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
30 Jan 13
Im sure it was a great feeling to to that... Maybe now you guys can become friends again. Good luck. Have a great day...
• Valdosta, Georgia
30 Jan 13
It was nice being able to say sorry. I felt bad for hurting him and I felt bad for not knowing. So I have an old friend back again too now.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
31 Jan 13
You did not do them intentionally, so I didn't think you did anything wrong. Besides, he didn't confess to you earlier, so he is to blame, too.