working moms... would you rather stay at home?

I'm a stay-at-home mom so my answer is really biased :) But given a choice, I'd still choose to stay at home and take care of my daughter. Nowadays, its so hatd to look for nannies who'll genuinely take care of my baby. And if my husband can provide a good life, its okay for me to stay at home. BUT that doesn't mean I'll just rely on him all the time. Even if I'm at home, I still look for ways to earn money for myself.

I can't really give you a woman's perspective on this, but as a stay at home dad, I can say staying home with my kids was very important to me. My fiancee had twins and when we started doing the figures for child care it was more feasible for one of us to stay home and raise our own kids. My fiancee had the higher paying job so she continued to work. She does feel a sense of guilt about leaving the babies, but when she comes back home she gives the babies her full attention. Meanwhile, I do feel too financially dependent on someone else, but the time with my children has been very valuable. I never knew all the things I missed out on because I was a working father before and I was too absorbed with my job that I had very little time for my older kids.

I would rather have my own means too. Though it's essential that mothers be there for the kids, there should also be a venue for her to find her own means and be able to find self-worth in the process. Remember, being a mother is a thankless job and a never-ending job. When a mom has the right venue to earn too, she feels satisfied and motivated in her life. The routine of taking care of the family may dull her excitement, but having sources of income for herself can give her more ideas on how to budget and manage the home well. Further, if the mom is just at home all day, it would take much toll on the relationship between the husband too. She'd be tempted to nag a lot because she will always just keep her eyes on the husband's whereabouts. Further, she's also going to be frustrated because she's depending on her husband and kids for happiness. If they're not home, then she will be bored. All she'll think about the whole day is "when are they coming back?!" ehhehee.. My mom, on the other hand, has a better circumstance (I think). She isn't required to have a job, but she has a flexi-time job. She has a source of fund (though not very big) but she's able to come home earlier than my dad and the children to take care of the domestic duties. She also goes out with friends (recently going to Bangkok for a week) and still has time to keep herself beautiful. My mom isn't insecure. Neither is she giving up family for career. I think all women should work. But also remember their obligations for the family. Therefore, women shouldn't be too focused on work (no overtime, not handle too much responsibilities as well). I guess the problem here is the fact that most of the people these days cannot really choose their jobs. Further, women are becoming more into career and husbands don't compete as much. Which makes the family life threatened, fathers no longer have stable jobs.. Temptation is really massive these days, husbands and wives cheat. Single men and women are no longer afraid to steal married men/women from their families. Homes are broken and all because people no longer value and work hard for the family. It's difficult. But I do hope we'd have stronger family relationships soon.

I'm going to be a working mom, but I don't have kids, and I haven't even graduated :D. But. I don't think I would be a stay at home mom. It just wouldn't be my style. To be honest, I'm pretty sure that I had to go to work for financial reasons even if I didn't want to, but I do want to :P. First of all, I really wanna be independent financially. I mean, I trust my boyfriend, but you never know whether your relationship is going to last forever. Then the wife can be really vulnerable and exposed. No matter how hard raising a child can be, it's not going to be paid... and the guy can be like, I've earned all the money, she just spent the time at home, I'm gonna bring everything with me. I don't want to get into a situation where I have no money, no work experience and no roof over my head. Also, I like mental working, I'd like to find my individual fulfilment, I wanna do something with my skills. Also, for me, it would be really boring to stay at home with the kids, almost every day being the same, not being among adults every single day to talk to :D.

Hi there ! I loved to take care of little children , to nurture them well to the best of my ability but i just too talented to stay in four walls of the house. I have the skill , talent and the profession , i want to use this and to prove my worth to the family. I am working at same time i am managing my family also. It doesn't mean that because i have children then i will be setting aside my profession and skill , i still can perfectly do all my duties and obligations to my kids at same working . It is just a matter of having a systematic system then all will run smoothly without sacrificing the other.

When I had my son, I had to work back then, since I was the only one raising my son, my husband was no where around, and later he ended up in prison, where he is today now my son is older, he has kids of his own I baby sit, for him sometime but I on longer make it a habit like i use to.

I prefer to work than staying home. I would rather be out than be inside all the time. It doesn't mean I dont want to take care of the kids but that can be solve. A working mom can do multiple things. I've seen a lot of them. :] xx

I have been working for several years already and if ever given a chance, I would like to stay at home but of course I still want to work but not the one with a boss anymore. That is why I am trying my best to be successful with my online career so that time will come that I don't have to leave home anymore in order to work. Travelling everyday makes me sick.

I wish they thought lie you. I can see many of such moms are regretting their decision. I know someone special to me who would have been better off if she would stayed home rather than earning millions that she does. She is so sad that her only son is not with her but staying far off, almost 10 k KM. I am so sorry for her because I too am responsible for her suffering. Cheers.

i am a stay at home.. though sometimes we have financial problems but thank God their are people helping us.. i choose to be a stay at home mom because of my son.. i think he is too small to leave him to a nanny which i don't know if he will be going to be taken good care of.. so i decided to be with him for now.. if he is grown up i might consider working to help my husband with our expenses..

I love being a working mom no matter how difficult it may be side by side with my responsibilities as a mother and a wife. Just like one of the discussants said, I also want to have my own means too and find my own individuality as a career woman. Time will come and our kids will become adult and they will need us less and less. They would finally find their own life and interest and when that time comes we will feel alone with nothing to fall back on. Besides it feels better that you are able to fulfill your duties as a mom and a career woman at the same time.